My 16 Year Old Grandson

Updated on August 09, 2010
P.B. asks from Saint Paul, MN
5 answers

I have legal guardianship of my 16 year old grandson and I am on disability so I had to get some help for him. Well, my daughter got served with child support papers. If she gives me custody of him, will she have to pay child support?

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So What Happened?

She has to go to court in Arizona and she is mad. She is very self centered. My 9 year old granddaughter lives with her. So my grandson has a mother that doesn't want him, and a father that doesn't want him and I have him in therapy three days a week--2 days they come to my house and 1 day a week we go to the therapists' office..J's so messed up..he knows that I love him but, I'm not his mom. She's alrealdy complaining about bying him school clothes and she isn't paying the child support yet and what he wants for school is at Walmart!

More Answers

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J.R.

answers from Davenport on

Kudos to you for taking him in, that has to be a hard decision all around. My In-laws are in the same position with their grandkids form their eldest daughter, but they have had the kids ( now legally adopted) since they were 3 and 6, the kids are special needs and now are 14 and 16! It is emotionally and physically hard, but also very rewarding.

I looked up some links for you on the web about guradianship in your home state of MN:
http://www.mncourts.gov/selfhelp/?page=1207 ( there are sdditional resources linked at the bottom of the page)

http://www.lssmn.org/grandfamilies/default.htm

http://www.mnaging.org/admin/grandparents.htm

http://www.gu.org/Grand###-###-####.asp

http://raisingyourgrandchildren.com/States/Minnesota.htm

http://www.mnadopt.org/Factsheets/Grandparents%20Raising%...

http://www.extension.umn.edu/distribution/familydevelopme...

http://www.grandsplace.org/gp4/mn.html

http://minnesota.publicradio.org/collections/special/colu...

http://www.aaaphx.org/GRANDPARENTS+RAISING+GRANDCHILDREN/...

Hope this helps!

Jessie

1 mom found this helpful
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B.B.

answers from Madison on

Yes she will. He's her son regardless of whether she want him or not. Sorry to hear he's had such a hard time. Hope he's able to move past his bad mother and live a rich happy life.

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L.H.

answers from Milwaukee on

I believe even if she gives you custody she will have to pay child support.
Good luck

A.S.

answers from Davenport on

If her parental rights are legally terminated then she will not have to pay current support (she may still owe back support). Same goes for the father.

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C.A.

answers from Atlanta on

I just wanted to say that this tears my heart apart as I am quite sure as the Grandparent to this child it does yours too. I know this poor child must be really messed up because of his mother's actions but just know even though you can't replace the fact that you aren't his mother he can know that he is still loved and sometimes a Grandmother's love bond is so much stronger than anything else. :)
As a mother myself there is nothing my children could do for me to write them off like that. I might be disappointed in their actions and decisions at times but not enough to ever make them feel "unwanted". He has a purpose here whether he realizes that or not. I'm very glad you have him in counseling hopefully that will help him through this and I hope that it doesn't damage his idea of what a "mother" should be and be disgruntled towards women all together-what a shame that the mom place that stigma. Especially when he has a sister and she seems to be more wanted than him. He must feel like he did something wrong or something is wrong with him. This just breaks my heart and all I can say is I will pray for your family and that God will make all of this alright in the end. I would assume your daughter will have to pay child support whether she likes it or not. It is her child and she is responsible to pay no matter the circumstances. Just as if she decided to keep him and had the father sued for child support as well. He has just as much of a responsability to pay for the child as does she. Any judge would see that. A co-worker of mine went through something sort of similiar the child was a lot younger but her daughter was strung out on drugs and she ended up having the Grandson for quite sometime. During that time she got approved for several diffrent things like reduced daycare cost, food stamps, etc. Make sure you get all that you are entitled too and give that boy lots and lots of hugs and kisses. I know he is 16 and probably doesn't care too much about that kind of stuff but I just hope she hasn't tarnished this poor boy for life. I hope one day he realizes it wasn't him but HER and I wish she would wake up because one of these days she is going to wake up and realize and regret what she has done and when that day comes your Grandson is going to have a big decision to make whether he wants to accept her or not and why on earth should ANY child no matter the age be forced to make that decision -very sad sad thing.

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