My 16 Month Old Is Ruling the Roost

I think for the wild parts of his behavior, it sounds like he needs an outlet for a lot of energy. Even if you don't have a playground to take him to, he might benefit from some nice long walks outside. Let him stop to explore and experiment. I think that the climbing is just a natural part of him exploring what his body can do and it's not something that he will give up on easily. It would be better to find some things that he can climb on. He may really benefit from something like a toddler gymnastics class.

As for the head butting, what I did with my daughter was to walk away when she hurt me. I would say something like, 'That hurts. I don't want to be with you when you hurt me.' I'd let her get upset and then ask her if she wanted to be nice so that I could play with her again.

Another thought that comes to mind is that my daughters behavior gets really crazy if she feels like she hasn't been getting enough of my attention. She'll do things that she knows always get a reaction, like pulling the cat's tail. Alex may just be saying that he wants you to play with him in the only way that he knows how.

i have an "all-boy" boy who just turned two - we live in an apartment and have the same problems with "space" and room for him to run and kick off some energy. does he enjoy parks when you take the other kids? my son even before he was old enough to really "get it", loved running up and down on the playsets parks have nowdays. he still isn't really big enough to use the regular swings, but he loves the slides. also we take him a couple times a month to run around the great mall, when they first open and aren't as crowded. i also sick daddy on him, and get them to wrestle (safely) in the livingroom, on pillows, couch cushions, even his mattress sometimes. ANYthing just to burn up some energy. i am already thinking about getting him into a martial art or another class to keep him occupied, soon. anyway just my two cents - i hope it helps. keep redirecting him and teaching him to be more gentle (we had to do that BIG TIME with our son, and the cats). and eventually it'll get better, i'm sure.

It sounds to me like maybe Alex is just not finding enough ways to burn off the energy in that little body!! You need to find a way to get him outside and just run him ragged. If he is focusing his energy on play..hopefully he will have less time and energy for climbing and "Bonking". And as to that "bonking"...I would put a stop to that quickly....let him learn that there are consequences to his actions. I dont advocate spanking...how can you teach him not to hit when you are hitting...but there has to be something that will get his attention. Time out in his crib or bed...dont get upset...try to stay as calm as you can ( I know..easier said than done)...explain to him "that hurts Mommy"...and that you don't hurt people you love.
It sounds like Alex is an intelligent little boy...and I applaud you for want to get a handle on this...maybe you should consider putting him into a daycare setting one day a week....good interaction for him....and a break for you to do "adult things" for a few hours!! You might also benefit from some ideas you could pick up from the day care professionals on how to redirect Alex's energy and focus. Good luck

My little girl is now 20 months old and a few months ago she was the exact same! It is not just a boy thing even though boys tend to be worse. It sounds like he is just going through a normal stage where he is beginning to test limits and figure out his world. Welcome to the beginning of the terrible twos! Yes, it can start this early. Just keep doing the redirecting and make sure that you tell him WHY he is not supposed to climb on everything. Maybe find a way to create a safe climbing environment that you can take him to when he gets in the mood. If he is willing to clean up after he dumps the toys then you are doing something right. As for the bonks, tell him soft bonks are ok and show him the difference. Try to be patient. It won't go away over night and it sounds like you are doing all you can. I would not call him a bully, just a fun active kid who just doesn't understand how strong he is.

I know and understand that panicked sound in your words! Don't worry, dumping the toys and picking them up, and dumping them again is how they learn cause and effect. It does get on the nerves, though, having to pick them up all day.
If you're not already involved in something, I recommend finding something like Parents as Teachers to get with. They help me a lot, by doing home visits and giving me information on what's normal at what age. Their web site is parentsasteachers.org, and you can find a group that's near to where you live. Good luck!

I have a daughter who was and still is (she just turned 3) a climber. At about 16 months she learned to climb the child safety gate to her and her brother's room. I found her on her brother's top bunk. Just this last year she got on the top again and fell through the slats that the mattress goes on. I just about had a heart attack. We switched his bed around so the ladder is against the wall, but since his is a full bottom and twin top, she found out how to climb up the pole and get up there anyways. It is definitely not just a boy thing. Our daughter is just very strong willed. She is extremely smart, however, she cannot sit still for lesson time, and learns best when she actively does things. I also babysit in my home so it makes for an interesting day when you have a climber. Just try to stay on top of things, I know that can be hard. We are thinking about letting our daughter play soccer next fall to help her release her built up energy. Maybe if you can, find one of those kiddy tunnels, my kids have a tent and ballpit, and that helps our daughter be crazy with a safe activity. Hope this helps.
J.

I hate to say it, but he is just all boy! I have 2 boys: 7 y/o & a 2 y/o (will be 3 in Dec.). Both are climbers. My oldest has always climbed everything - like a monkey! My youngest is the same - if not worse - He even tries to climb up our front door! We had to put anti-tip brackets on the dresser b/c my youngest uses it pull knobs like the rocks on a climbing wall! I truely empathise with you. You are lucky that he likes to pick up. My youngest also cracked me in between the nose while i was trying to get him out of his carseat. I told him that it hurt (with tears flowing from the pain) & that it is a no no. He has never done it again (but that is just my son).
I'm sure you don't have much space in your house, but we had a toddler climbing cube & a toddler trampoline that has helped our boys. Redirecting has never really worked for our boys either. You might take him to the park & just let him run.
For the head butting/bonking try not to have your head at his level for running hugs. If you are on your knees as his runs to you he would hit your chest instead of your face (he can give you a hug around your chest instead of around your neck). It will still hurt, but not as bad as your face. I hope that makes sence.
For the kicking at diaper changes you can either try pull on diapers & change him staning up (I think Pampers makes them) or we used to pin our boys down. My toddler would lay down on the floor in front of me & I put my ankles/feet on his shoulders/upper arms to hold him down & tell him no kicking. Sometimes I had to hold him there until he stopped kicking to change him.
I hope this helps!

God Bless!

He sounds pretty typical to me. There are some behaviors that need to be stopped, like the head butting. Just like Super Nanny, you need to find a thinking spot and put him there every time. Consistency is the key here. Bed is not recommended as you don't want to associate bed with trouble. A high chair isn't the greatest either because of associating food with trouble. I use a booster high chair on the floor so I can strap the child in and if they rock hard and tip over it won't hurt them. At his age time out should be 1.5 minutes or so. Don't try to break all behaviors at once either. Start one, then the next week start another as he will hopefully have figured out the consequences of the first by that time. Remember he is a wonderful little boy who is learning about his world. The good and the bad!

Good Morning B., Love your name :)
Anyway our 3 1/2 yr old gr son was & is active like your little guy.
His dad plays rough with him and he loves it. BUT he knows now he can't play like that with Momma, Nana or baby brother. Only with Daddy. When your little guy comes at you for a hug get to where you can place his head closer to your shoulder and not close to your face. Then tell him no Bonks. We did the bonks too with kisses after. If Corbin gets to rough I always tell him he hurt Nana and we needed to slow down.

He goes to pre-school twice a week now and we pray with him before he goes in each time, not to throw rocks ( gravel) on playground, be kind to class mates, say nice words, Don't SIT on them, or help them Go down the slide quicker........lol

I've had Calamine lotion poured of the foot stool and carpet, I have had baby powder dumped on him self head to toe before going to Dr. appointment, Had to vac him off :))
All the DVDs removed from cases and 7 of them put in the VCR.
He is quicker then lightening at times. I do watch him closely but sometime Nana has to go weeeeeeeee or put her face on or get dressed to go out somewhere.

Your little guy is to young for time out in a chair, he would be up and moving in a split sec. Putting him in his bed is not a good deterrent either, he could come to hate his bed.

Stopping his behavior, the Bonking, with talking to him might be best at his age. Run that little guy outside around the house, with the kids you watch. Get some bubbles at wally world ( wal-mart ) they have them in long tubes with wand attached for less then 1.00 and let him chase the bubbles for a while. Get some larger balls for outside play with the ones you watch too, they can kick them back and forth or toss to each other. Anything that makes him move and run off energy is great for little fellas like ours.
I have one more gr son who will be 1 the 23rd of this month, and I expect to do the same with him as I am now with his brother. Zane already loves watching bubbles float as Corbin chases them. Makes for Awesome Nap time when they are worn out good!!

Good Luck to you and your little guy B., you will both survive this stage too.
God Bless
K. Nana of 5

Congatultions - You have the "baby of the family". I have one of those also, she's 5 now and I know what her problem is - ME! She's my baby, when she was born I knew that unless God had other plans for me she would be the last and I spoiled her. She has a temper and can bring our whole family to their knees, my dad has always called her "the bulldog" because she just pushes her way though and gets her way. And she knows who is going to give it to her (ME again). I wish I could tell you that it gets better, but the combo of being the baby and stong willed, that is hard to break. Be thankful that's he's sweet that makes things better. My daughter is in school now and I am learning to be firm with her. The doctor told me to stop saying "but she's just a baby" everytime she does something (I also carried her everywhere until she was 4). She is rotten. But she is perfect for her teacher in school and her preschool teachers always talked about how good she was. So go figure, guess she just bullies those that let her. The thing with these guys is not to back down, if you say no mean it and if he's hitting you a firm no and put him down. Also try reading Dr. Dobson's book The Stong Willed Child and Kevin Leman has several good books also. Good luck!

lots of good ideas already posted, & here's some more: he needs to get his energy out & outside is not always an option, sooo get a children's exercise or dance dvd. This works great at focusing & containing extra energy!

Another option would be working fine motor skills...Play-Doh is always a fav with kids. & if you get his mind questing on problem-solving activities (where's the sock? is an example), then he won't focus on destroying the house.

& just as a heads-up, this behavior is just not "boys". In my daycare, I currently have a girl who could match a lot of your son's activities. (& this is not the 1st time I've experienced this with girls!)

From a behavior standpoint, it sounds like you're doing everything you're supposed to! My oldest son was a lot like this, & I used to say that if I survived his childhood then I knew that he'd be one heck of an adult....& I was right. He's 21, & facing more physical adversity than most parents ever have to face....& is determined to beat his physical handicap. We are very proud of his "edge" which carries him through. But from age 18 months to 3 years, I had a facial muscle tic that would NOT go away...he was a challenge!