My 16 Month Old Is Having Awful Tantrums....

The best advice I've ever gotten for tantrums is to put the child in their room or crib and pack and play and walk away. Once the audience is gone, they tend to wear themselves out and tire of putting on a show. You can tell him he can cry and scream as long as he wants and then you will come and get him out when he is all finished. 16 months might be a little young to understand what you're telling him but he'll get it when he realizes you only pick him up when he stops crying. This can be really trying for you in the beginning but it works ! Good luck with whatever you decide :)

Let him be! It's all an attention thing and if you give it to him he is going to keep doing it. Make sure he can't hurt himself and let him go.
My now 12yo DD once threw one of these at the store, I walked out with her and strapped her in the car seat and then I sat on the hood of the car where she could see me. She would stop crying for a second, I would open the door and ask her if she was finished and she would start screaming again, this went on probably 3-4 times then finally she stopped. I got her out and finished our shopping. You could use his crib when your at home or a playpen if you have one. But the big thing is to only speak to him when he is not crying or screaming and if he starts again just walk away. Make sure you say things to him like "let me know when your all done" "I would like my little boy back please" They really do understand.

As for the hitting, the Super Nanny time out or Naughty Chair REALLY works if you have the patience for it. If you have watched that show you'll know what I mean, it's amazing how well that works.

Good Luck!
K.

I have an 18 month old who also throws tantrums. I've also tried lots of different coping strategies, but the best I've found is to completely ignore it--no matter where we are. She started with the tantrums at about 15 months, but I'm happy to report they have lessened in frequency and severity since I started ignoring her. Then, when she's done with it, I go on like it never happened so she can see that it didn't affect me in the least and she still didn't get her way.

My kids went through the same thing. I would attempt to comfort them - offer a hug, talk in a calm manner, use words to describe how I thought they were feeling. I knew they were too young to be able to speak those words but hoped it would be helpful when they finally were able to speak. If they didn't respond I would let them work through the tantrum. I just made sure they were in a safe area and not doing anything to hurt themselves or anyone else.

When my older two were this age, I would put them in their crib until they were done. They were both told I would get them when they stopped. I would make sure the monitor was on and shut the door on my way out. (They really didn't like that part, but it was my way of letting them know that behavior was NOT allowed.) They would still occasionally have tantrums, but nothing major. I would only have to ask if they wanted to go to bed and they would stop.

I have seen at least 3 other sons of my friends go through this stage, so it seems like it is just a phase-although my son did not got through this. He is frustrated and doesn't know how to express it. I would definitely not yell back, do whatever you can to dial down the stress, do not allow him to EVER hit you, just grab him in a big bear hug and let him cry it out until he is exhausted. Remember- swaddling? sometimes a bear hug that they cannot get out of will help. Try to reflect his feeling back to him- or if you are at home and he is throwing himself around, walk away, do not respond if you feel it will go nowhere, do not provide an audience for de-constructive behavior.

Totally normal behavor from a toddler. He is testing you and he wants to see how you will react. I usually ignore (if she is not hurting anyone or anything) the tantrum. Once she knows it doesn't phase me, she stops.

Ignore him. Obviously if he is on the track to hurting himself in someway you should intervene, but my daughter went through that for a couple weeks and the minute she would start I would tell her softly 'that is not a nice way to talk to mommy' and would turn around and walk away from her or into another room - but where I could still see her out of the corner of me eye. At first it would make her more upset, but after a few times of her not getting any reaction from me, she did it less and less. Now she is tantrum free and I really believe the reason people have troubles with the "terrible twos" is because they overreact in those situations. If you talk calmly to your child, they will learn to talk calmly to you. But your getting excited or angry will only feed into her frustrations. Good luck!!

Hi B., and welcome to the terriable two's...a bit early! He knows what he's doing if he stops when you look away. Your best bet is to do what I did...if he starts to throw a fit look at him, calmly say something like: "When your done let me know" and walk away and do something else. Of course you want to make sure that there is nothing that can hurt him around him before you walk away. IF you don't react he will stop and if you keep not reacting his tantrums will go away. If your in a store or mall when he starts then you should leave at once and go home. No stops, no treats. It only took us doing that twice to our girls to end any and all fits when we were out. FYI Never ever make a threat to a child you can't or won't follow through on! All it takes is to back down once, and your crediability is shot. Hang in there, it's just a stage, and you'll get through it...we all do!! Good luck & best wishes!

My son is 21 months. He did the same thing around 15 months. It's very wearing on you as a parent. And while I am a supporter of spanking, this is NOT an occasion to do it. It sounds like your son is ready to be introduced to time-out. It will take a few tries for it to work but eventually he'll figure out that this is not acceptable behavior. Since my son is 21 Months, I put him in time out for 1 1/2 mins. By the time his time is up, he's calm.

Just have patience, it will get better and the sooner you nip this habbit, the better off you'll be. Good luck!

my daughter starting throwing tantrums at about the same age ur son is. I think it's just a stage. She still does it ( she's 22 months) but only when she doesnt get her way and when she does it i just ignore her and she will stop. Just dont give your son any attention when he does that cuz then he'll want to do it all the time to get attention. Kids like to test our boundaries to see what they can get away and what can get them to get their way, just no matter what dont give in. Oh and she likes to throw things and hit also when shes mad. When she does that i give her a firm no and take away whatever she threw. Not sure if this is any help or not but i thought id let u know ur not on ur own, a lot of kids this age act like this, its normal.

Just a question....did he recently have his MMR vac?
Some kids really go thru things after the shot.
IF not, could be the age.

B.--I know this can be a terrible and annoying stage! My son is 17 mo and just finished several weeks of tantrums. The only thing that worked for us was ignoring him. We would walk out of the room and he would stop, look for us, follow us to the next room, then start again--AHHH! Then after a few weeks they started slowing down and suddenly we only really have 1-2 tantrums a day now. For my son, it corresponded with him having a major language breakthrough. I think he may have been very frustrated by not being able to communicate. Now he talks constantly and before he starts screaming I can usually figure out what he wants. Good luck getting through the tantrums!