My 10 Month Old Is Waking up at Night Again

Try the 20/10/5 rule..........she is probably at that age where she thinks if she can't see you, you have fallen off of the face of the earth. Let her cry for 20 minutes (I know that is hard to do, but go outside where you can't hear her if necessary) after 20 minutes go in her room, comfort her for about a minute, and then leave again. If she starts crying, let it go for about 10 minutes, then go in and comfort her, and repeat for five minutes if necessary. If you have to (hopefully you won't) then start all over again with the 20. We only had to do this a few times before we saw positive results! Hope it works out for you!

Hi A.,
I know it's hard, but my advice as a mom and a family therapist is to let her cry it out. You'll all be much better rested once you do! It usually takes 3-4 nights, and you can expect she will cry a bit longer the second night than the first, but after that she should cry less and less till she doesn't wake at all. One key though: you must make sure you and your husband are in agreement on this-- if one of you keeps sneaking in to sooth her, all she'll learn is 'if I cry long enough, someone will come!' and she'll keep crying.
Best of luck!

From my experience (my son just turned 2), most kids eventually go back to their "normal" sleep pattern, & that there can be a multitude of reasons as to what interrupts their sleep. Rarely do I hear of a kid who never had sleep issues. Most kids have bouts of waking up at night - it's just a part of the process of growing. Yes, it could be teething, they could have an upset stomach from something they ate that day, something like a car starting at night could be waking her, she's remembering an event from the day that wakes her up, anything really.

And you're dead on - if you start a "habit" that is helping her get back to sleep, she'll wake for that too! Whenever our little guy starts to knock out of his routine, I make a very real effort to a)not spend a lot of time in the room with him & b) to make sure it's both mom & dad making sure things are alright. As long as there's no fever or any real sign of discomfort, I assume he's just waking for a reason I can't possibly fix & treat it as such. A quick hug, kiss on the forehead, tuck the blanket & walk out the door. If there's really something wrong, he lets us know it, but otherwise, he usually figures out that we're not spending all night with him in the room. We have made that mistake way too many times in the past & that can be a very difficult thing to break.

I wouldn't be so concerned about the "why" of it all unless there's fear, pain, fever, etc. associated when you go into the room. Just be loving, quick & consistent. She's still very young & will definitely be back to a more normal sleep pattern in no time! I, too, highly recommend the Healthy Sleep Habits book - it was a lifesaver for me!!

One book that helped us out tremedously was Healthy Sleep Habits, Healthy Habits for life. I got it from Target for $12.00 and it has helped me transistion through every stage. At 10 months if you as mom know that there is nothing physically wrong and her waking has become a habit, then I know that with our son we let him go back to sleep on his own. It might take 10 minutes or so (maybe longer or shorter depending on the personality of the baby) but then they will understand that mom and dad vivsiting at night is no longer part of the plan and they will resume sleeping through the night. It can be SO hard but really their sleep is SO very important and in their best interest. Be strong, You can do it.

MOTRIN...I absolutely recommend it for the tooth pain. Also if you use a pacifer I learned this by experimenting, squeeze water into the nipple part, freeze them and then give to your child. Soothes their gums. As for sleeping, I also recommend Healthy Sleep Habits and I also LOVE the no-cry sleep solution. You can also try some benedryl. It won't hurt them, it helps them sleep better and long and trains them to stay in that deep sleep period. I know sounds weird, but really it works too.

Good luck.

My daughter went through the same thing around the same age. After a week of it taking me 2 hours to get her back to sleep, I decided I had to take a different approach. As much as it broke my heart to hear her cry, that's what we did. I would lay her down in her crib and tell her it was time to go to sleep. After 10 min, I would go back in and lay her down again and say the samething. For us, after about 5 more min, she would lay down and go to sleep. Also I learned when she would first wake up in the middle of the night to just let her cry for a few min and she would usually go back to sleep on her own. She is a pacifier baby and after many nights of it falling out of her crib or her throwing it out, I attached it to her blanket with one of those clips you get for their clothes. Now when she wakes up in the middle of the night she knows to search around the blanket to find it.

Hi A.,
I HIGHLY recommend reading "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" by Dr. Marc Weissbluth for any sleep questions. He explains about biological sleep rhythms and how/when they develop/mature. The book is broken down into sections for easier reading. You are right that your daughter has gotten used to your attention and help falling back to sleep. I have found that the hardest thing for me about being a mom is to tell the difference between a NEED and a WANT. What she NEEDS is to go back to sleep on her own, what she WANTS is to see you guys and have you help her fall back to sleep. Which of course sets you up for many more nights of fragmented sleep for everyone. My daughter is 3 yrs old and has recently started waking up at night, even though she has always been a good sleeper. I realize I will have to let her cry it out for a night or two, which is still hard for me though I have done it before with great success. I would let her cry it out for 5-10 mins (or longer) to see if she settles down by herself. Make sure she is going to bed early and getting enough daytime sleep. Email me if you have questions, I will share the things I have tried successfully.
Sincerely,
L.

If nothing else works; try giving some magnesium (some children are defficient on this mineral) in the evening. There is a co. with a wonderful magnesium cream that also helps to sooth them while you rub it.
www.springboard4health.com I gave it to my son for a couple of years (because he needed it all this time) who had a horrible sleep disorder. it also helped for his chronic constipation.
good luck

I bet she's still teething. Be careful with the teething gels because they can make the baby choke on their saliva. You could try tylonal (only in moderation - be careful not to make it a habit) but she might be in pain. You can rub her gums with your fingers and that might help offer her some relief. My 2 1/2 year old had his teeth coming in very quickly and he was constantly teething. There are teething tablets from hylands. It's homeopathic and gentle. I would occasionally give my son a tablet before bed. Also, now since she's got a tooth, it's a great time to start brushing her teeth. Very important even if she only has one. Good luck A..

We went through this with both of my kids anytime they had an illness. I actually took my daughter to the doctor convinced she must have another ear infection and there was absolutely nothing wrong with her. She confirmed that it had just become a habit for her and we needed to reteach her how to get back to sleep on her own once she wakes up. For my son it was just a matter of letting him cry for a few minutes and he would settle right back down. It's hard not to jump right out of bed and run into their rooms though, especially when they have been sick or teething. It depends on your child's temperment on how you handle it and whether you believe in letting them cry it out or not. I think the quickest way is to let your child cry for a few minutes and they will usually settle right back to sleep. With my daughter, we had to work harder to get the environment right for her. She would wake if she was too cold or too hot, so getting the temperature right was key for us. We've got it down to a science now, but if we forget and leave her fan on she almost always wakes up. Also, my kids sweat a lot in their sleep so they get thirsty, so I let both of them take water to bed with them. My daughter needed a night light in her room when she was much younger since when she woke she could not locate her pacifier to get herself back to sleep. If you don't believe in crying it out then you need to follow whatever method you used when first teaching her to self soothe herself to sleep. It only took one or two nights for us to get back on track, but when you are going through it it does seem much longer than that.