I have a 20 month old and we are about to move to a new, and bigger apartment. It is only a few blocks away from where we currently live but I am worried about her feeling like we have left our "home."
What has helped your little one understand better and feel most secure? Any tips appreciated! Thanks! :)
At her age, as long as she is with you, has her same bed and her lovie - blanket or stuffed animal - she'll be fine. The new place will quickly become home.
A little about me: Child Psychiatrist in practice 16 years, married 21years,two kids 20 and 13. We made several moves when the kids were young.
She is still young. For her, "home" means her parents and familiar things.
Try to have her new room as similar as possible as the old one (same furniture, organization, colors...) and keep everything "routine" related the same too (from her cereal bowl to the rubber duckies in the bath).
If her own world remains similar - especially the routines - the change of the "outside" (a different address, apartment size...) will not be as traumatic. And don't worry to much about it, at this age, they are still ver adaptable!
My son is 3 and already lived in 3 different places. He never had any problem to adapt. But, if I give him milk in the yellow cup instead of the blue one, if I make a mistake in the good-night song or the boat is missing from the bath, then we have a problem!
Good luck with the new place.
It might help to drive by the new apartment every day or so, and talk about how that is going to be your new home. I wouldn't worry about it too much, just try to keep your routines the same, and make sure none of your child's 'comfort items' are misplaced during the move!
Hello Sarahcouv,
We moved a lot in the military and several times after and with 5 children we learned a few tricks that really helped esp as some of the moves were from Oklahoma to Guam!
We packed all the things from their room and made sure the important things were with us-- it was a tough 1st night but my husband & often guys from the base would help set thier bedrooms up before anything else was done. Some times I would take them out to play and a movie or dinner while this was going on so they came home to things they knew and loved so they felt safe. The 2nd thing we learned to do was to get a pop up dome tent- they take minuets to set up and we would let them sleep in that with blankets or a bag and then when we got to our new house they could do the same. With 5 it was good becasue we had young and older together to support one another.
BUT THE MOST IMPORTANTTHING WE DID-- we took our children and showed them the moon everynight prior-- and told them that the moon was moving with us so along the way they would look for it and even from an airplane they could see it and that was a great comfort to them and as they got older they have talked about how they felt safe and secure in a odd time of many moves some unexpected and had to do quickly.
Good Luck hope this helps.
The other thing we did that was fun was before the move
I agree w/the other three resopneas....don't over think it. Kids are a lot more resiliant than we think. With that in mind; we moved when our oldset was 2.5 years & here's what we did: As others, we unpacked & set up his room first. Luckily, my parents helped us move so I left my mom & our son in our new house so he could see all of our stuff moving in. We also spent time at our new houe before we moved in. Good luck!
We moved 2 months ago and my daughter really wanted to go back to our old house. I had her room finished first so she walked in and saw all her stuff and I even bought her a few items from the "house" It didn't take her long to adjust and now she loves her new house. Good luck.
don't over thing it. she will be fine. what we did though when we moved was to unpack the kids rooms first. . my youngest was 5 when we moved. we unpacked his room first and set it all up before unpacking any other rooms that way he had a place to play and all his stuff ready when he got to the house. it kept him out of the movers hair lol
Give her a reason to feel that the new place is somehow "hers". I can't tell you for sure what that would be for your daughter, but here's an example of what I'm talking about. A year ago our son and his family moved to a new house. They were purchasing. Sometimes when looking at a potential house, the electricity would not be on and we were looking toward dusk. So my husband took along a couple of flashlights to help us see things. He always had a flashlight that he gave our grandson, who was about the same age as your child at the time. The boy loved looking around and giving his own "approval" to the houses. When they found the one they eventually bought, we knew it was the right one for them, simply by the way he reacted to it. It was obvious he felt right at home from the first time we saw it, and he's never had a bit of problem with the move.... even though it meant for the first time in his life he had his own room to sleep in.
Another thing is that when visitors come over after the move, let your daughter show them around "her" new house.
I agree with the rest - just did this with our 2 1/2 year old - get her stuff unpacked first - her bed her sheets her toys. Don't question or worry about anything when she's around, she'll pick up the vibe. Just stay calm and excited like everything is normal and she'll follow suit.
We moved when my daughter had just turned 2 - no issues at all.
I think that as long as you are excited about the move then your baby/toddler will be excited - talk about how great the new place is going to be and be sure to talk about it a lot so that they understand what is going on. My kids always wanted to know are we taking our toys with us? are we taking our beds, and on and on.....I think you will be fine as long as he/she is not sensing any negative vibes from you about the move and you speak of it positively. Good Luck - I just moved about 4 months ago, and I definately remember how much work it is!
reading the book "boomer's big day" (and discussing it a lot: how was boomer feeling, how much fun boomer ended up having, etc) really helped for my little guy!
arrange Baby's room the same way as much as possible - NOT a good time to buy new furniture etc. You can redecorate in a month or so.
Stick to your normal routine as much as you can - try to make it fun - pretend it's an adventure. Limit stressing out in front of Baby if you can.
Make sure you have Baby's favorite toys and bedding etc. and have someone baby sit while you move so Baby isn't in any danger of getting stepped on by the movers. ;)
