Moving Tips for toddlers....Looking for Advice to Calm Their Nerves

Try having a talk with them.

Depending on the ages maybe they need some down Mom and dad time alone then they can help you pack.

Good luck

My Dad was in the Army while I was growing up and so my family moved a lot. I remember reading this book called Sad Day Glad Day, it is very old so I don't know if it is still in print. In the story a little girl is moving to a new house, she accidentally leaves her doll at the old house and is so upset about it until she discovers that the former occupant of her new house has left a doll for her with a note that says she can keep this doll in her new room. The little girl loves the new doll and she sends a letter to her old house telling the little girl whose family moved there that she can keep the old doll that she left. I may remember the story a little inaccuratly but that is basically it. Anyway, my Mom read my siblings and I that book and we would pick out a toy to leave in the old house for whomever would live there next. My Mom also discretly placed a new toy for each of us (it does not have to be expencive, play dough and bubble blow are great choices)in our new bedrooms for us to discover. I think that is a great way to help with a transition. Also make sure and talk up the new house or new city and how great it is! Visit the new parks and library and wherever else you think the children will have fun as soon as possible, make moving into a great new adventure! Good luck!

When we moved I borrowed a bunch of books from the library that had to do with that subject. I can't remember any of the titles, but had just asked the librarian to begin with. Some had such exciting stories about moving. They made it more of an adventure and talked about the new friends they would make and what their new rooms would be like. They were very helpful and got my daughter really excited.

I have a two and four year old. I think that all the stress you are feeling because of the big move is felt by them. It is a stressfull time, but in order to keep those feelings from rubbing off on them you need to distract them. As much as you can, just stop packing, cleaning, working and just play with them. Laugh, run, tickle, go to the park, take a walk, sit down and play a game, anything that totally is fun and has nothing to do with the move. Whenever I have something big coming up and start freaking out about getting the house cleaned up and food prepared, my kids act out. It is hard to stop what I am doing and just play, but it makes a huge difference in their behavior. Most of the time if I give them just fifteen minutes, they will do anything to help me. They will pick up their toys, ask if they can help with whatever I am cooking, they want their own towel or paper towel to help wipe off the dust, and they even follow behind me with a toy vaccumm. Just give them plenty of attention and play time. They will be just fine. They'll even at that young an age forget all about it after a couple months. Good luck!

Homeopathics to calm children are available in all natural food stores/co-ops:

Calms Forte - small tablets they can suck on. (really work well)
Rescue Remedy - put four drops in their bottle or glass of milk/water, etc... several x/day.
*Rescue will help with the sadness they experience from moving as well.

We moved from Minnesota last year to Europe. Our daughter was 3 then and, we decided to look at it as an adventure such as going to Disneyland. This made it tollerable for all of us. We looked at books, maps, videos, etc. of the new area and made lists of things we couldn't wait to do/see once we got there. It helped to let our daughter be a part of the decision process whenever possible. One of the biggest things that she has enjoyed along the way is her own photo book of her past neighbors,old house, friends, relatives. She still looks at it often and proudly shares it with her new friends. She went 4.5 months with out her things so it was very important to have a small bag of her favorites with. This has been a great adventure and, our 4 year old has been great thru it all.

We moved just last year with our then 3 and 2 year old...it is a hard transition because they think their things are still at the old house...it is very hard for their mind to switch. The BEST thing that I did and would tell anybody to do it is to take your kids back to your house after everything is out and cleaned up. My then 3 year old couldn't understand why we weren't going back to our old house, and when I took her back a couple days later she ran to her room, ran down to the living room and seriously came back by the front door and she said..."okay lets go!" You could see a weight at just lifted off of her...it was amazing and I'd totally recommend it.

We moved across the country with my three year old, and in retrospect, the most important thing for him was making sure he felt secure and "sure" of things. If you're moving locally, maybe try to keep things as consistent as possible--keep to their schedule and make sure they know what things aren't going to change. My son needed a TON of mommy and daddy time--snuggling in bed at night, playing, and just being around--he wouldn't let us get out of his sight.

I remember a Bearnstein Bears book that dealt with them moving. My mom still has the book. Perhaps you could see if any book stores carry it or maybe find another book about moving and add it to bedtime routine.

K.,

You may want to have them keep a special toy or comfort item to travel with and have in temporary housing or in the new house before everything gets unpacked. You can talk about and even roll play what will happen when and in what order.

Something that did help my kids so much is that we quickly established a support system in our new location. We attended church from the first Sunday we were there and I contacted the President of the children's Sunday School organization ahead of time so they could make room for my kids in a class with a teacher who knew they were coming.

We moved just before Christmas break and I waited until after the holidays to put my daughter in school. We did go to the school a week before she started to take a tour, meet the teacher and the staff. We brought all her school supplies and she was able to organize her desk and already knew where everything was on her first day. I also drove her to school the morning of her first day.

It may help to find a Mom's Club or something similar in your new area so you can make some playgroup friends. Unpacking can be a daunting task. Make sure to take breaks and explore a new park or see a fun museum in the area frequently. Check out the city website of your new area for ideas. We showed our kids all of the fun things to do in our new city to help them get excited about the move.

Something that surprised me when we moved is that my children had a hard time understanding that their stuff would come to the new home. I explained it - multiple times - but it just didn't sink in until we started unpacking the new house. My kids aren't stupid, it seems like a logical thing, but they really stressed over it and kept saying they wouldn't like the new house because their stuff wouldn't be there. I would go over it again, very clearly, and they would just block out the explaination. I think they just had more to think about then they could keep up with.

Best of luck,
S.

When we moved I got a couple of books for the boys.
One was Berenstein Bears - Moving Day
and another that was about a puppy and his family moving...
it was really cute; Boomer's Big Day - and it exlpains through Boomer (the puppy) that all of his toys and things will come with to the new home etc. I think it would really ease the transition for you kids. I think that sometimes they think that their things won't get to come with; so these books really help eleviate any stress or fears they might have. Just remember to stop for a second and think about how they might view this 'moving situation'; it can be kinda scary through a kids eyes... the unknowns. Just keep them posted on the happenings and they'll be fine.
Good Luck! Isn't it fun to move kids and all their STUFF!

Hi K.,

We're moving soon too and one thing that has helped us is asking my daughter to describe, decorate, envision her new room. It has given her something to look forward to. Just a small tip for you, as I've noticed you've received a lot of great advice already. We even picked out a wall plaque with her initial on it that is intended for her "new room" and she keeps it in a box she can look at. I think I'll let her carry the box in the new room and let that be a big moment when she decides where it goes on her wall.

Plus, my sister moved a year ago and she swore by hiring packing movers. It costs a bit extra, so if you can afford it, it might lower your stress. I'm still debating, it'd mean no new dryer at the new house, so I'll probably skip the movers :)

PS I'm in the corporate world also and I understand how important those "mamma times" are. I try to focus on her and not think about missing time for myself. Shortly, she'll be grown and wanting her independence and then I'll have (probably too much!) time to myself.

We moved 500 miles 1 year ago with a then 29 mo old daughter. We talked about it alot and I also got a book or two on it. We talked lots about the new house...even though she didn't really get it until after the fact.

My parents were at the new house to greet us and kept our daughter busy "visiting".

The first thing we did was to put her room together so it was w/o clutter the very first night. It went really well and the transition was very minor.

Now that it's been nearly 13 months, she is starting to talk about her "old" house and where her room was, etc.

There was just an article in the May issue of Parents magazine about how to help kids through a move. It had some great ideas: Let your kids map out their new bedroom, let them choose a paint color for their bedroom walls, pack a treasure box of special things they can take in the car with them, explore the new house together. There were also some kids books listed about moving.

Just talk to them. Make sure they understand everything and everyone that will be moving with you. We haven't done it yet, but I've discovered my kids didn't realize that their toys, furniture, and PETS would "move" and be at the new house too.

Also, try to avoid eating out too much during the transition, and when you do, try to eat comfortable, filling things like subway sandwiches. (This comes from my own experience as a Navy-brat.)