This is kind if a stupid question, but here goes... lol.
There is a walking path near my home where we like to go. It has a lot of trees near the walkway, and many of them have little marble markers (slightly raised, about 1 square foot) with things like "In honor of _______" or "In memory of________".
While we are walking, my 3yo DD always wants to stand on them and jump off... Or in areas where they are planted one right after another she likes to hop from one to another. ("It's hopscotch Mommy!" She says. Lol.)
I am always torn as to whether or not it is appropriate to let her stand on them. It seems kind of rude to let her play on something that is supposed to serve as a memorial, although, many of them are simply donation plaques.
But, there is very little chance hat she can harm them... And they are placed right next to a walking path that has a few parks along it... So I imagine hat people KNOW children will be playing on them.
So, do you think it is offensive to play on these little plaques, or is it acceptable?
Yeah, Turnip, those are what I am talking about. :) About half of them are donated "for" someone. There are also benches that are donated, with similar writings on the side... But they are obviously meant to be used. Lol.
My feeling is that life should go on, and that there is something beautiful in a young child joyously playing hopscotch on a memorial plaque. It's the circle of life.
When I'm gone, I hope a child dances with joy on my grave.
Jo, you crack me up.
As long as there isn't a person buried by them you are fine. At my daughter's old school they have a walkway made up of memorial markers, how could you possibly avoid walking on them?
Just want to make sure I am understanding, are these markers that you buy which funds the upkeep of the walkway you are on? I mean those are not memorials so much as saying who you donated the money in behalf of.
Again with my daughter's old school there is a massive one in honor of my ex in laws donating a wing practically, if I could get my foot up that high I would have no problem stepping on that. :-/
I think that, while nobody is likely to say much to your cute 3 year old, it is a little disrespectful. And I think it's important to teach our kids to be respectful of the little things that we humans use to memorialize and honor the lives of those we love and lose.
So let her know that she can "hopscotch" OVER the stones, but not on them. Because they were placed there to remember someone who died that was loved and is missed very much.
It's a good lesson to share with her.
Tell her what they are and what they are for. Let her know that those stones aren't play stones. They are special stones, memory markers for people who have died so that those who love them can share their love and give a gift of a tree to others. A very basic explanation is all you need.
There are a couple of trees at our local park - the kids all climb on the trees, but they stay off the plaques. I told my son what the plaque was and he was fine about it. He also asked about the graveyard we drive by - I explained it as a Memory Garden.
I'd be afraid she'd get hurt on them.
I would not allow my children to play on them. To me this is the same thing as keeping them off of statues, out of fountains(obviously spray fountains on spray grounds are different)and so on. These are places they are not permitted to play on regardless of the proximity to a walking-path or park. Whether or not it is offensive is subjective, however I would not think kindly of the parent(s) that allowed and approved of their child(ren) possibly damaging property playing when there are more appropriate and designated areas to play.
If its on the walking path i dont see any harm thats what they are there for!
I would tell my kids to keep off the plaques and explain why. We have some little stones in our front yard that I made with the kids for my husband a few years back for Father's Day. They have their hand prints and some mosaic pieces in them. They are special to me and I've always asked the neighbor kids or when I did daycare out of my home, my daycare kids, to stay off of them. I want to preserve them. So naturally, if I saw my kids playing on these plaques that are special to someone else, I would tell them to stop.
I agree with you that no one would probably be surprised to find out that children step on those plaques. (I've seen similar plaques that are flat on ground level - it can be hard to *not* step on those, even accidentally.)
I guess my feeling is, don't worry about it too much now. When she is old enough to understand, explain to her what they are. Then she can develop her own sense of "respect" for the plaques and she can decide how she wants to treat them.
I would not let her play on them. I feel it is a little disrespectful. This would be a good time to try to explain to her that they are special stones and tell her why in simple terms. It is never to early to teach about respect.
I don't think it's offensive but it's not acceptable. You could use it as a teaching opportunity and use the markers for counting or finding certain letters or words on them. You could also use them as a way of discussing death and how someone missed that person so much that they wanted to plant a tree in honor of him/her. Or if it's a donated tree you could open a talk about the enviroment and how trees are important in keeping our air clean.
