Lying - Katy,TX

Updated on January 01, 2011
D.S. asks from Katy, TX
4 answers

what do people gain by lying. My ex husband come up on my facebook for a friend just out of curiousity I checked out his profile. all of it is lies.. he told people he did a tour in desert storm. he was in charge of 10 other people but he went to fort sill in desert storm not overseas. :) he also put his favorite phrase was do unto others as you would have them do unto you . interesting coming from an abusive ex husband. just curious what do liars think they are accomplishing by lying.????

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So What Happened?

I am so glad he isnt my headache anymore. He has actually gotten worse since I divorced him. but man the lies continue. they are also getting real far fetched too. but I did love the book suggestion. thanks guys what you said did make some sense even though I will never totally understand it.

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J.W.

answers from Lexington on

The fact that you stated he was abusive pretty much explains how messed up this person is. He may be narcissistic. He may rewrite history even in his own mind to build himself up to be the person he thinks he should have been. He probably is chameleon-like -- empty -- taking on traits he thinks others want him to be. He himself is not real. He obviously has a severe personality disorder, so asking why he lies is like asking why a twisted person is twisted. It is the way he is put together, so to speak.

You probably got involved in the first place just because you were emotionally vulnerable at the time. Abusers prey on that. It probably fell apart when you got stronger. Now, with his facebook page, he is weaving yet another spider web.

You might want to read some wonderful books by Patricia Evans. This one is about understanding what she terms controlling people http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/158062569X?ie=UTF8&t...

4 moms found this helpful

G.T.

answers from Modesto on

Liars live a completely different reality than regular people. They make it up as they go. They lie because they are not secure, the lies keep everyone at a distance, they are unable to commit to anything. Their payoff is that no one knows the real person behind the lies....they are too afraid to be vulnerable by letting anyone in. It's sad.

1 mom found this helpful
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L.M.

answers from Chicago on

I don't like dealing with liars. I like knowing that whom I'm dealing with is telling the truth and I don't have to read between the lines. I know someone that does the same thing your ex does and people believe them because if your not around the person everyday, you don't contest what they are saying.

I agree with Jeanie regarding the chameleon personality. Eventually people find out the truth, if they desire too.

Most liars don't understand that there are people out here that know their lying. Sometimes it's just ignored depending on circumstances. The thing is, your ex is just fishing for bait. Hopefully no one bites.....

(Lying about the military is the lowest of low to me) Trying to gain some sympathy. I know it's bothersome to see him do this, but be happy your free.

1 mom found this helpful
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T.F.

answers from San Francisco on

No answers for you, same question. Especially if it is something they can get caught lying about! Two of our classmates put their BDates in -8 years. Now, our graduating class size was around 60! One of them received so much ribbing about it from many people that went to our school let alone grade! Geez! We are old but I remember sitting by this person in 3rd grade and she was NOT in utero :-).

1 mom found this helpful
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