Kitchen Set?

This is so crazy, this is what my husband and I argued about all holiday season. My 2 year old asked for "grandma's new kitchen" for Christmas. I say it is ok, he said it could make him have strange tendencies later in life. How many men have cooking shows? So, he is getting that kitchen for his birthday.

G.,

I know you don't need yet another response...but we got my son a kitchen and we call it his "Chef Station"!

Have fun!

J.

I say get the kitchen set!!! When I substitute in the pre-K room I notice that more boys play in the kitchen center than girls. I don't know about the rest of ya'll, but I would LOVE to have a husband that knew how to cook and clean, lets teach them while their young!!!

This is a gift for your son, not your husband. It's good to encourage OUR CHILDREN'S interests, not our own, whether they be "gender-specific" toys (which a kitchen is not--has he watched the food network? not all the chefs are women) or not. Men can be silly, usually because they're afraid that if they encourage their children in their interests that aren't specifically men's (hunting, yardwork) their children will be effeminate or something, which is the most ridiculous thing in the world. Sorry if I'm coming off strong, it's just that I get so upset about people teaching their kids that something is wrong because it's a typically opposite-gendered activity. Think about it this way, if your daughter loved baseball and was really good at it and asked for a good bat for xmas but your husband said no because "baseball is only for boys" what would you do? I would encourage you not to just buy it behind his back or anything like that, but have a conversation about gender expectations and what's realistic, and what is just an outdated cultural norm, etc.

Ok-I know the whole 'manly' thing but we gave our 4 year old daughter a Dora kitchen last year and although she has gotten some play out of it...my son who is 15 months LOVES it. He constantly heads to her room to check it.
I don't believe it's a 'girl' thing. It's not going to be pink. And remind your husband there are plenty of male chefs in the world. Maybe your son is an aspiring Emril. ;)

Imaginative and pretend play are terrific things for a childs development at this age. Kitchen stuff is totally appropriate for girls or boys. If you think your son would love it, get it. Your husband will get over his dated ideas about what men's and women's roles should be. I have boy girls twins the same age and both are interested in a variety of toys and playthings and have the opportunity to play with same things in our home. I don't have a problem with son playing with a pretend kitchen and I don't have a problem with my daughter playing with a pretend toolbench set. Hopefully they will grow up to be teens and adults that love to cook for me and want to fix things in my home. LOL. Get the kitchen.

Happy Holidays!

My oldest was taken by my parents to Toys R Us to pick out his Christmas present at 3, he went to a kitchen set and played forever.

My dad and brother had more issues with it than my husband, but that is what my son wanted. He served me food for countless hours! It was one gift that got the most play.

I never get why people are so worried and push gender specific on our children. If your husband worries that your 3 yr old will be gay for playing with a kitchen set, Ha... just wait! You only have boys (for now) but when they go to a little girl's house to play, they will only want to play with girl stuff...but it is just because they don't get to play with that at home and most likely that will be when they are even older LOL! (I only had boys for 10 yrs)

Get the kitchen set, get him some play food, and some play dishes-they don't have to be a tea party set- plenty are very nongender looking. There is one that has a kitchen on oneside and grill on the other. Lots of men cook...and most even cook better than women!!

Your husband will get over it and your sons will be well rounded! This could even make them be good husbands- haha- you never know!

Good luck...

Kitchen sets are wonderful for little boys. We got one for my now 4 year old for his birthday last year. He and my two year old son love to play with it. I did get them a more "manly" version - has a grill area, and umbrella like it is outside. That seemed to fly better with my "manly" husband than other sets. It is also small space friendly. I hope that it will lead to them being wonderful cooks just like their daddy. :)

L.

Everyone seems to love your question!!! I think it is because most of us have been there, or know someone who has. My girlfriend's husband didn't want their son to take gymnastics because he thought it would make hime gay. Good grief!!! Let him do what he likes to do- forget the stereotypes!!! My girls play with toy cars, and if they wanted to play football, my only concern would be injuries. Have fun with your boys!

Men can be so goofy!Give that boy a kitchen set! We all have to learn how to care for ourselves in life. So why not start at the first step at feeding yourself. Toys are not really gender specific except for color. My daughter had a bubble lawn mower and supposedly that is a male thing. She knows how to mow the yard now! We should empower our children to try all kinds of things! My four year old son loves to do the laundry, the switching of machines is his favorite part. Now if I could only perfect his folding technique! Be strong and foster all of your son's interests even if they lean toward what is commonly known as girl stuff. Just no Barbies, she is not good for anyone's realistic body image. CB

Tell your husband to shove his chauvanistic attitude down his throat! Ok, well, maybe not quite that, but he is being ridiculous. What would you say to your 3 year old the reason why he couldn't have that kitchen, because daddy thinks its too girly.
Whatever, there are men cooks and chefs in the real world. If he loves it, I'd totally get it. My 3 year old has a kitchen AND a tool bench, and he still plays with all the normal boy stuff, oh yeah, and he takes his sister's baby doll around in the stroller too!

Its funny how we socialize our kids towards certain activities. And yes on the whole, parents mostly buy kitchen sets for girls. I think this has less to do with what they like and more to do with what we want them to like!

Buy him the kitchen set. Who knows, maybe he will be a Master Chef one day and you'd be proud to know that you gave him what he need to fullfill his aspirations. I know I'd love to have a Chef in the family. Go for it!

I got my son a kitchen set for Christmas one year, I think he was actually closer to 5 when I got his for him. He loves to cook. He is 11 now and still likes to cook. They do have kitchen sets that don't look as girly that lean more towards boyish colors if that makes your husband feel better. They also have a kitchen set that has a BBQ pit on the other side of it. Maybe that will man it up a little for your hubby lol... But there is nothing to worry about, my son also got one of those easy bake ovens one year from his grandmother but it was blue and grey. They are starting to make boys feel included when they create some of those toys now. You can tell your husband that my son had a kitchen and tons of food and while he still likes to cook at age 11, he also plays football and baseball and rough houses with his friends. lol... Another good thing is that I know when my son gets older that I know he will be able to feed himself and his siblings if I ever do need his help, right now he cooks under supervision. Good luck and I think your son would love a kitchen..

My son is four and he loves the play cook also. Last year I got him alot of play food and dishes. This year I wanted to get him a kitchen but my husband said no cause it was for girls. So I went and bought him a bar-b-que pit and a little stove that sits on his lap and he can cook on those.

Go, G.! Give him that kitchen set! It does not matter, boy or girl. The fantasy play is good and should be encouraged. Besides, my husband does all the cooking at my house when he's home. Most famous chefs are men these days. The kitchen isn't just the woman's world anymore anyway.

K.

My son (3 1/2) loves his kitchen set I got him. His daddy laughed at that gift a little bit...but probably because I got him a potty doll at the same time. Lol. Daddy cooks a lot, so his son, of course, wants to be just like Daddy. What's wrong with a man who likes to be in the kitchen? I promise you his future wife will thank you for encouraging him to have an interest in cooking! I love that my husband can cook good meals for our family. (And our kitchen set is neutral colors of browns and blues...it's so cute!)

I would agree that little boys might think it's fun to help out, but if I were you I would not buy him a kitchen set because it's just not seemed as appropriate for a little boy to play with something that is regarded as a "girl" type of toy. I speak from experience because my oldest is a girl and my little one is a boy and he of course plays with his sister and sometimes her "girl" toys. However I have to discourage him from that because once when we were at a birthday party (a little girl's) there were only girl things to play with at their home and my son grabbed a disney princess wand and started to play with it banging things with it, not even waving it around. Next thing I know my son which is only 3 was getting looks and comments from adults! They were saying "he's playing with that, he likes the girl toys. Of course, I was offended and I told them, well you only have grirls and there is nothing here for my son to play with because there's only "girl" toys. I've done my best to teach my son to not play with girl toys and he understands, but it's harder for little boys because even at such a young age, so much is expected of them because they are males. If a little girl plays with a "boy" toy it's not regarded as weird than if a little boy plays with a "girl" toy. So my advice is to spare yourself the annoying rediculous comments others will make if you buy the kitchen and spare your son from hearing them. They are not old enough to really understand why there is a separation of girl and boy toys. To a kid a toy is just that, a toy. If you really want a cooking/kitchen like set, they sell the talking outdoor grill for little boys. I think it's called "Playskool Charlie Coal the Talking Grill". Hope this helps.

My son has been "cooking" for me since he could walk. The only reason we haven't gotten him a kitchen set is because we really don't have room for it. Now he's 4 and he's learning how to cook for real! He loves to help us in the kitchen and we figure it's a good way for him to learn. My husband is the cook in our family, so it's perfectly natural here! Besides, what about Emeril, Tyler Florence, Bobby Flay and all those other famous chefs out there...most of the famous ones are men!
I say get the kitchen set and enjoy the "treat" he cooks for you! Who knows, he may be a great chef someday!

Hi G.,

Aren't gender issues fun? I think everyone's covered the bases on this. If it makes your hubby feel any better, remind him of Emeril, Bobby Flay, etc. Those guys are making HUGE amounts of $ cooking. You'r little guy is probably copying you, and may lose interest eventually. Get him a tool set too! Then he'll repair the kitchen :)

Hi G.,
Being a mother of a 4 year old boy, I have gone through and still go through this same situation. My son wants the kitchen, the stuff that comes with it, he also wants a kids vacuum, brooms, mops, you name it, if it cleans or has anything to do with cleaning and the kitchen, he wants it. But let me tell you, he is definaitly ALL BOY, just because he wants the things i've listed, doesnt mean that its going to change the boy in him. If anything, having the cleaning supplies will help him, help ME when it comes to cleaning. The kitchen sets are a great way to teach them to make things (imaginary obviously) and if you get the one that has the dishwasher and/or sink, it will give him the idea of cleaning up after he is through cleaning.
No father wants his son to have girly things, but there is one thing that they have to know, all want to explore different toys, and they teach children, in one way or another. Dolls for instance, it teaches them how to care for a baby. even boys!!!
talk to your husband about the things i've listed. Its scary, but it doesnt change their choice of being a little boy, it just adds to it i think. Responsibility, caring, cleaning, tidyness, all those wonderful things that we all want our children to learn.
Good luck with this and i'm interested in knowing the outcome!!

Our 2 yr old son has a kitchen set (made by KidKraft) that is in primary colors with fake food, dishes, etc., and LOVES it. He also has lots of blocks, trucks, and puzzles. I think kids should be allowed to have pretend play in all sorts of areas, and kitchens are a major part of a regular household. The dads need to face the fact that their boys WILL try to put on make-up, play house, play dress-up, play kitchen, etc., just as I'm sure they did when they were that age -- whether or not a kitchen set is present. I'm proud to have a husband who cooks and intend to prepare my son in the same way! GOOD LUCK!

We have a grill and a small kitchen (actually it is an oven/micro combo) and a huge bucket of play food. My kids love it (three boys 4, 2, 1) and play with it all the time. They love to help us cook and be with us in the kitchen when we prepare our meals. For the holidays, we even created a family cookbook for our friends and family and included all of our favorite family recipes with pics of the kids cooking them. I think its great that boys have fun in the kitchen, too. It sounds crazy, but if they like it enough it could be a career for them, or at least they can help out when they are older and make the meals for you! There is nothing wrong with learning to cook...it's just the same as learning how to saw a piece of wood, play an instument or hit a ball...they are all skills that you, as parents, can nuture to help your kids become well rounded and productive members of society...

Dear G.,
It is a normal and necessary part of development for boys to do "girly" things. Most of the top chefs in the world are men. Look at food network, men run top kitchens and make lots doing it. If he loves it, encourage it and tell your husband it will pass like so many other wonderful and sweet things little boys do!

Hey G., By all means, PLEASE get the kitchen set for your son, he will LOVE IT. I have three boys, now ages 18,15,11 and they all had dolls and kitchen stuff, and they LOVED play food and pretending to cook. My youngest son even had a couple of barbies, and believe you me, they are all BOY, nothing wrong with that at all, tell your hubby to get over it...
Merry CHRISTmas!
D. In Frisco

I bought my son a Dora the Explorer Kitchen when he was 2. My son loves to cook and we had no problem with that. I think limiting toys to "boys" and "girls" is not a good thing. Our sons just want to be able to do everything mom and dad do.

I know you've received a ton of responses, but I wanted to respond as well and let you know that we bought our daughter a kitchen set when she was 18 months before our son was born. She is now 3 1/2 and still loves to play with it. However, she doesn't love to play with it near as much as her little 1 year old brother does. We bought it for our daughter before our son was even born, but he definitely loves it and plays with it all the time. It's his favorite thing to play.

My daughter is almost two and one of her favorite toys is Tonka trucks- and I encourage it. I say go for it, he will love it. My 4 yo nephew comes over and plays with our kitchen all them time. Merry Christmas!

I think if you don't make a big deal out of it, it won't be a big deal. Just say maybe he wants to be a famous chef when he grows up! :-) My 4 year old son saw a commercial for some hair beading gadget for girls. The commercial made it look so cool, he wanted it too. I just said, I don't think your hair's long enough and it was no big deal. Mostly, we let him pick the toys he likes and he still likes his cars and trains.

Absoulutely, get the set for him if that is what he enjoys. Our society in the past has limited our imagination and potential because of the gender roles imposed on us. Tell your husband to tune in to the Food Network and watch for a few days. There are plenty of masculine men in kitchens and wearing aprons. And in addition to that, they have female fans falling at their feet. My three year old son loves to play cooking and tea party w/ my four yr. old daughter. He has no idea that it is supposedly a "girl" thing. They both love pretending to cook different meals for my family and serving them to us. They both also love to watch "Good Eats" with Alton Brown and all of Emeril's shows. My boy also loves monster trucks, and loves to play wrestling, and pretend pirates, and knights. My dad has always been an excellent cook, my husband does alright when he gets in the kitchen too. Do I want my son to grow up thinking that cooking is just for women? Absolutely not!!! Get him the kitchen set, G.. I hope that your husband will compromise with you on this decision. Perhaps you can throw in a pair of camouflage oven mitts to balance it out.
L.

SOMEwhere in the responses might repeat this, but I didn't find it....

Many women have pointed out that he's responding to what he sees you doing, and they are correct. That is exactly right for his stage of social development. He is still in that age range where the kids don't *exactly* understand that there are differences between boys and girls, and he doesn't actually identify himself as different from girls--yet.
He's role-playing what he knows, which is his life with you.
When he's a little bit older--and this will be any week now--he will begin to identify himself with Daddy, too, and want to mimic the things that Daddy does. As he matures socially, he will more and more strongly identify as male AND as himself (as in answering "that's ME" instead of "that's Taylor" pointing to a photo). I'm sure your husband will be very comforted when that happens. :)
Until then, and maybe for this Christmas, consider getting your husband and son some matching camoflauge pants or sweat shirts or ball caps--or the whole outfit! That will undoubtedly ease your husband's feelings of doubt about getting the kitchen, and it will be a nice start of having your son identify with his Daddy.

What great discussion this has generated!
Happy holidays,
~K.

I have 2 boys age 4 and 2 and they love their kitchen set.

I am having the same problem with my husband! But I figure I will get it for my son anyways, because boys should be in the kitchen just as much as girls should!! What lady wouldn't want a man that knows his way around the kitchen. Tell your husband as I have told mine, it won't hurt him a bit after all they are only 3. Where did you find one with that color combination?
J. R

G.,I would not get your son the kitchen set, although I feel it is appropriate for him to want to play with it. A three year old boy's interest will mimic his primary caregiver. Let him play cooking all he wants and let him help more in the kitchen with you and your husband. Your husband playing with him would be a good role. His interest will start changing quickly over the next year as he becomes more interested in the things your husband does with him. In a group setting a 3 year old boy will role play mom and dad jobs.
A little about me: 52 year old mom of 4 grown children, 2 boys and 2 girls. Grandmother of 7. I also owned a large childcare center for 19 years and just retired from Childrens Ministry.

You need to find an episode of Hell's Kitchen and make your husband watch it! Chef Gordon Ramsay is amazing, definitely not wussy, and shows that being a chef is AWESEOME.

Get your son the kitchen!

I have a friend with 2 little boys and the DAD bought them a kitchen set and put it near the real kitchen to try and keep the boys out of the real cabinets. HE didn't see anything wrong with it. What's wrong with men cooking? They usually make great cooks in my experience. Tell your hubby chefs make a LOT of money.
:-)

My Mother saw that my son was fascinated with the vacuum and bought him a play one that made noise and picked up very small things. It's all play and doesn't hurt them! He's 14 now and all boy (but has a sensitive heart to his Mom and animals)!

Hi G.,
I can sympathize with you. I was telling my husband that I found some cute play kitchens for my son when he gets older (he's only 5 1/2 months). My husband laughed and said we weren't getting him a kitchen, those are for girls.
I think if that's what he wants and he likes pretending like he is cooking then there is nothing wrong with it. I just think these men get a little worried that it will make their son gay - which is really silly if you ask me.
You never know, your son may turn out to be a wonderfully well respected chef!

Good luck!
S.

My son is just 11 mos. old this Christmas, but I am already planning on getting him a kitchen next year. I think the only time a kitchen set is girly is if it is Barbie. :) There are very manly chefs out there and if it will keep the kiddos entertained long enough to cook dinner it is a win win situation.

Hi, I don't think a kitchen set is exclusively for boys at all. I'm the mom of three boys, and last year for Christmas, we bought the two youngest ones a universal play set that could be used as a kitchen, a store, restaurant, whatever their imaginations came up with. I got them some of the fake food, pots, pans, dishes, little aprons and chef's hats, etc. They loved it. My husband didn't have a problem with it, either, if you want to know the opinion of another father of boys. I hope this helps!

Merry Christmas!
D.

You got a lot of opinions on this one. Well, I have 3 boys and the older two LOVE playing in the kitchen set we got them. There is nothing wrong with it, it has not affected my boys one bit. They will bake me something in their kitchen one minute and then get out pretend guns and swords and fight with each other the next. I plan on teaching my boys how to cook they need to be able to know how to cook and do laundry and help out around the house once in awhile. It is a good quality in a man that can do those things. It is not at all just girl stuff. And believe me we are Christians and believe that the man should provide and the woman take care of the home, but in the same breath there is nothing wrong with the man helping his wife when he is not at work :) I say let that boy cook!!! He could be a great chef and own his own restaurant someday.

I purchased a Step2 kitchen for my 2yr old son. My husband was completely against the idea. His thoughts were exactly like your husbands. Well I finally convinced him, and here it is. We have two boys, a 2yr old and a 12 month old. They love playing with the kitchen and every little BOY & girl that comes over loves playing with it. My husband does most of the cooking now since our second little angel arrived, there was just no time for mama to do it. So I told him, what's wrong with my sons wanting to grow up and be chefs or a great cook like their daddy.

There is nothing wrong with it, as long as you're not getting a pink or pastel kitchen, you know. Men...uhhh!

Dear G., I'm a mother and a grandmother so feel I am entitled to have an opinion about "gender crossing" toys. Your husband is absolutely WRONG about that kitchen set!!! Toys do NOT dictate what your child's gender preference will be in later life, which is what this is all about. Both my sons, as well as my grandson, had dolls when they were small, as well as a kitchen set! Both sons grew up to be wonderful, masculine men with wives and children, and my grandson is 100% boy (discovering girls!). By the way, my youngest son, who especially loved playing with the little kitchen set and helping me out in the "real" kitchen (to the angst of his father) grew up to be an executive chef, making very good money! And his wife and daughter enjoy the fact that the man in their life can serve a gourmet meal for dinner. Let your little boy have that kitchen - and your husband might think about getting down and playing kitchen with your son!!! In the end, THAT will influence how manly your boy grows up to be.

Men cook better then women in many cases. But I got my granddaughter a Barbie stove with the microwave on top and we put it in my day care. That is the first thing the kids run to. They have tons of food and cook up a storm and never get tired of it. Two little toddlers opened the storage drawer at the bottom and were fighting over the stove and stood the door and broke one of the hinges but it still works. I need more bulbs for it and the batteries seem to last and last in it as well. Best investment I made. She had it for a few years in her room and even though it cost $100 it was well worth it. Pink and all. Go for it but if hubby is not sure do not make him mad over it. The kids still bring me food on plates. Even 10 yr olds. God Bless you and Merry Christmas G.

Has he never heard of men becoming Chefs? Anyway, this is just a phase your son is going through because he watches you all day in the kitchen. Make a bargain that your hubby can buy a big truck for your son for Xmas, maybe even a backhoe or something like that. Then they can play together outside and your son will be copying him.

Tell your husband that a great majority of professional chefs are men! I went to culinary school and 2/3 of the class were men. Once I was in the professional kitchen I was often the only woman in the kitchen! In fact most of the old school French chefs treat women like we have no place in the professional kitchen - that always made me so mad!!!! Anyway - let him play with what he likes! At the very least maybe it will fuel an intest in cooking and someday he can impress his girfriend or wife with his skills!!

I think it's perfectly fine for a boy to have a kitchen set. I have some friends who have only boys who have also bought one b/c they said their boys were playing with them at all their female friends houses anyway. Some of the best chefs are men after all!

yes yes yes! I have twin boys that are 2 and LOVE their kitchen. Pretend play is crucial for development. My degree is in child development/ family studies and all the books say it is super important. Gender roles will develop on their own. Most boys will naturally play more aggressive than girls and differently as well. A kitchen set is not going to sway that either way. From a mom perspective.. a kitchen is not just a girl toy anyway. Most of the top chefs today are men!! My sister runs a mothers day out program and she said in her 2 year old class that teh boys play with the kitchen set and big wooden dollhouse more than the girls do!

Tell him to look at it this way - all the great chefs of the world are traditionally men. I don't think Emeril is crying at night thinking that he's too girly! He's counting his millions instead!
Good luck.
C.

Take your husband to ANY preschool or daycare!! Boys and girls are encouraged to interact and play with the play sets as well as dress-up. In fact, the dress up and princess dresses are often more popular with the boys than the girls! It's perfectly healthy!
BTW, my son has a kitchen set too, and dress-up clothes! He is still all boy!

My 3-year-old daughter is in a playgroup with 4 other boys. Of them 2 already have a kitchen set, and one is getting one for Christmas this year and he's very excited.
I'm pretty sure that pretending to cook won't make them pansies.
Tell your husband to check the calendar... It's 2007, not 1947.

G.,
My son is 4 going on 5 in Jan. A kitchen is what he has asked for from Santa this year. He loves to help me in the kitchen. When he told his daddy that he wanted it, he turned and looked at me like with this funny look on his face like "what"! So I know what you are going through. But when my husband thought about it he realized that some of the most famous chefs are men. Look at Chef Ransey and Meril. So he told our son that was a great idea. He could learn how to cook and get a great job making lots of money doing it.

So explain it to him that way and maybe he will see it to. Walmart has them for $38.88 and BigLots had the food for $4.00. It has pizza, hamburgers, coke and all kinds of things with it. He will have a blast!

Nope- it's not just for girls. When I taught preschool the little boys loved playing in the kitchen. Some of the greatest chefs in the world are men. And perhaps your little boy will be a great asset to his family and help with the cooking (I sure wish my husband knew how to cook!) Cooking, family rearing, and all those other "girl play" things are good for boys too!

Does your son express an interest in "helping" you cook? (Rabbit ears becaus sometimes a 2 year old's help is more work than actual help hehehehe) If you son wants something like that, there is no reason not to get it for him. Both of my sons had sisters and they played kitchen with them all the time. They both know how to cook for just themselves or a crowd. This was a really good thing when my oldest son got married because his wife couldn't boil water. (For real not just the saying....she almost burnt the house down on more than one occasion.)
In a couple of years, when the subject of dolls comes up, there's nothing wrong with a male learning to be a nurturing individual either!

At Christmas 2 years ago, my son who was 4 at the time LOVED playing in the kitchen. A small kitchen of his own seemed like a great idea to me, not so much my DH but he was never 100% opposed to the idea. We looked at a couple places and found one that had kitchen on the front and a grill on the back of it. It was perfect, and made both of us happy.
Now 2 years later my oldest son will play with it only occasionally but our younger son plays with it all the time.
Just tell DH, some of the greatest chefs out there are men, and woman love a man that can cook...why not start them young?

That is ridiculous, toys are for kids. My husband is a chef and makes a very decent income, if he really is that worried about his boy playing kitchen. Maybe you should pick up the book Raising Cain, its about the emotional welfare and the neglect boys suffer in the States. My son has a kitchen, baby dolls and even wears pink sometimes. None of that makes him less of a boy.

I completely agree with the other moms, if that is what he enjoys get it for him. I have 2 boys (20 months and 3) that each have a doll that my grandma gave them because they threw a fit until they got it. They cuddle and hug and kiss and feed those babies. They love their cars and trucks but they love the babies also. I don't see a problem with it. Of course, my husband is just like yours and gets upset when I ask "Where is your baby?". He doesn't want me to encourage them being "girly". I think it is fine though. Good luck and Merry Christmas.

How many famous chefs are men? Aren't women drawn to men who can do something in the kitchen other than make comments regarding "when is it ready"? I am in my 50's and just think how happy my daughter in-law would have been if she had a husband who was helpful in the kitchen? Is being in the kitchen a girl thing? Absolutely not!

I had 3 kids in 5 years--2 boys and 1 girl. All of them played at the kitchen center. I can tell you now that it did not turn my boys even remotely into chefs or pansies. LOL They played with it because it was right by the kitchen and they could do that while I cooked--copying what mom/dad does. Think about it. Kids copy what they see and what they understand their parents enjoying.

He will play with 'boy' toys just as much, but while you are cooking it gives him another way to be near you and play.

Good luck,

That is a problem, G.. Not so much as to get it for your son or not, but if the battle is worth fighting w/ your hubby!
My daughters (and now granddaughters) were raised w/tools and dolls, knives and curlying irons, guns and horses and fashions. Not for any other reason than the fact I wanted them to have well rounded personalities, know they are empowered people and have a healthy respect for things that they may not want or be interested in, but others are.
I would try educating (not making him feel attacked) about chefs and great TV cooks. If you can help him break out of his mind set on this, now, he should be more flexible on other things later on. Good Luck and God Bless.

Boys can absolutely have kitchen sets. My little boy and girl share one, but my little boy is the one who plays with it.

Have your husband watch the food network. There are plenty of manly male cooks.

Tell your hubby to turn on the Food Network and see all of the famous men chefs! Look at most upscale restaurants and the head chef is a man. Just remember when you were single and had no kids- did you ever have a man cook for you? -Very sexy!

My kids are 14 mo apart and when they were little they had a kitchen set for them both.......I always wonder why folks think it is ok for a girl to play with trucks but not for a boy to have a kitchen set or anything else deemed 'girl'...talk about teaching gender roles...it sure doesn't make a male less male to cook, it makes him self sufficient and popular with the ladies.......most of the world chefs are male.........sorry, putting my soap box up...

Two boys (4 1/2 & 2 1/2) and we have had a kitchen since my oldest was 2 1/2. The kids love it and so do my husband & I. I think ours is Step 2 maybe - I love the imagination!!!

Good luck!

First mention to your husband that the greatest chefs alive are heterosexual men (so he shouldn't be concerned) AND that you can always buy him a set of CRAFTSMEN cookware (grill and cooking utensils) at Sears!

Hope this helps, you shouldn't restrict the kids at a young age, or any age for that matter. I have three girls (9, 4, 2) and the middle one LOVES cars (ironically she is also the most feminine, clean, precise one as well.)

B.

G., I am also 24 years old also stay at home mom. I have a 3 year old, she will be 4 in March. My youngest is 4 months. I think you are right for getting him something he likes. My husband is the same way, thinks she should not get certain things. Whether you get him the kitchen set he will still continue to give you play food. Might as well let him have fun with it. They only stay like that for so long. Things we find cute our husbands may not. They spend all day with us so all they know is what we do. So, yes I think you are right.

Hi G.,

I can't tell you if your husband is right or not. That would be a conversation that the two of you would have to work out together. However, I can say that my four year old son LOVES to help me in the kitchen. His favorite job is cracking the eggs. I love an encourage his help. I cooked along side my Mom and Dad growing up. I have many great memories of being in the kitchen with them and playing with my own kitchen set.

Also, most of the chefs I know of are men. I know many men who enjoy cooking. I think your idea of a gift for your son is great!!!! And what a wonderful thing that your son is already showing interest in helping you in the kitchen. I can say that I also know quite a few men and women who don't cook or know how to cook. They spend LOTS of money eating out.

I personally think it's great to encourage children in their interests wherever they lie. Who knows what a little encouragement may produce in them? Additionally, I see a kitchen set as a gender neutral gift; however, my husband might respond initially the same way as yours but after I had explained my viewpoints he would most likely change his point of view. So, maybe with a little explanation to your husband, perhaps he too can see that it's important to encourage your child in this area. I'm not saying that he'll turn into a chef but who knows!!!!

All of my nephews have kitchen sets (I have 5 nephews). I think as long as the kitchen set isn't pink- who cares. Lots of men like to cook and I don't think there's anything wrong with encouraging them to play at something they will benefit from learning about later. Discouraging him to play with kitchen toys may discourage him from helping in the kitchen all together. That's my two cents.

I am a preschool teacher and mother of 20 year old DD, 15 year old DD, 4 year old DS and 2 month old DS.

My son also loves to play with the kitchen and loves dolls. I believe that this encourages them to be great daddies one day! I think that this should be encouraged! Good luck to you!

get him a play bbq set.(fisher price maes some talking grills a few years back- I don't know if they still do.) Then add some kitchen accessories to it. Mke sure they are "boy " colors so your husband doesn't freak out.

Maybe if this were the 1950's I would agree with your hubby. That is way old school. Perhaps he needs to be reminded of Emeril and all the other well off male cooks on tv these days. Don't listen to that stuff. You stay home with him and know him best. If he is interested in cooking, go for it. It's all about his imagination and broadening his horizons. Just because he is in to cooking does not mean he won't want to play football, etc. Our son loves to help me in the kitchen too...but when the Longhorns, Cowboys, or Mavs are on the TV, he is only interested in hanging with Daddy. He and his Dad cook too...so I say go with what he likes. Don't try to mold him into something he isn't.

Tell your husband that men out number the women in the restaurant business. My husband is a chef.

G., Why don't you start having some of the cooking shows on when he gets home that feature the hunky chefs. Ask him if they seem girly, how much $ he thinks they make, & what their wives or girlfriends look like? Bobby Flay's married to that beautiful blonde d.a. from Law & Order. How 'bout "The Take Home Chef?" Doesn't seem girly at all to me! :) They all started somewhere! Let us know what happens! S.

I'm getting my son a kitchen set. Right now he goes across the street to play with the one there.

Remind your husband that most chef's are men and the make good money.

G., show your husband these posts - look at how many people agree that cooking isn't a 'girl' thing. The worst parenting mistake is stifling the interests of a child that wants to explore and learn! My (male) cousin went to culinary school and became the manager of a top-end Tahoe resort before he was 30! I did a quick web search for "famous chefs" and only 1 in 25 or 30 is a female! Not only are they rich, but they are married, normal manly men and get paid to do a job they love. Your son may not grow up to be a chef, but letting him explore and learn in a supportive environment will give him the tools to thrive and excel at whatever he does choose. Good luck!

Kitchen sets are not just for girls....just like cooking is not just "women's work". My mother in law made sure that all of her children (boy and girl) alike, learned how to be self-sufficent. Which means learning to cook,cleaning and doing laundry. I am very thankful for that, my husband now loves to cook, doesn't mind helping me with laundry and cleaning). For that I'm so grateful to her......She help make me a wonderful partner in life.

Sorry for the side note, but it's never to early to stop stero types . If you husband is too set against it....get him a grill to go along.....it's very male!

WOW!! You got some awesome responses. Just to let you know... I have a 5yr and 1.5 yr old boy and we are going tonight to get their kitchen set. Yes, my husband and I had the same conversation. He kept trying to get me to get the Home Depot nuts and bolts table. I don't know why.. he doesn't even have a hammer! Anyway, I won this battle and the kids will LOVE their new kitchen.. I guarantee it!

I read a bunch of these responses before i decided to write, no not all 71 but maybe the last 15. Something no one touched on is the fact that a kitchen set can't make your son gay, and not buying one can't prevent him from being gay. I don't think that gay is something that the gay community "chooses". They just are. My son loved shoes when he was little, you couldn't keep him away from them! He would try in everyway but the right way to put them on my feet! But now that he is 22 and serving in iraq, i am proud to say that he has absolutely no interest in shoes or feet!(no foot fedishes) yes your son might be a great chef one day "or" he might just play with that kitchen for 6 months and get tired of it! I say let him play in your kitchen and help you prepare some easy things. It is quite possible that if he had his own kitchen set, that some of his friends when he is a little older might make fun! Now that would be devastating! Of course if it is for very young children and you think he will have moved into the "big" kitchen by the time he has his school friends over, then i think it is a great idea. The bottom line here is that you don't want to stifle your childs development, or squash his dreams, but you also want to save him from any embarrassment from his piers (or your husband). If your husband is going to harass him and try to make him feel foolish when he plays with the kitchen i say don't do it and maybe get your husband some counseling also! I only said "if" not accusing anyone of anything. Just keep your son's best interest at heart before you make this decision. Best of luck

I think it't wonderful. My son just turned 5 and he has always played with my kitchen stuff. He has his own kitchen set like you are talking about. He loves to help me bake and cook. He also has some toys that your husband would approve of as "boy toys" such as remote control cars and guns. I think it will be a challenge to help your husband see that it doesn't mean your son is less of a boy because he likes to cook but I think you should stand up here and try to help him see it. Ask him if he has heard of Emeril. Bam! He is a chef, rich and pretty manly in my opinion. Good luck and I say buy it!

My friend has twin 5 year old boys and they have had several kitchen play sets. They recently got a new one for them. Also, when I have playgroup at my house, the little boys play with the kitchen just as much as the girls. I totally agree with the other posters....there's nothing wrong with a boy having a kitchen! Show your hubby these responses and get it for him. :-)

G.,
I just read this tonight and I wanted to say that I hope you got it for him anyway, inspite of your husband saying that to you. It was somewhat a sexist remark, however pretty typical for most fathers of boys. There is NOTHING in the world wrong with it. In fact, for my son's 2 yr. old b-day (next Aug.) I am getting him that, with my hubby's blessing! Good luck.
M.

My three year old son got money for his third birthday from his grandparents and he picked out a kitchen. He and his five year old brother love to play with it.

i say get it look at chef ramsey on hells kitchen, hes making money. i dont believe in that its for girls or boys now adays we all need to be versitile. let him play with what he likes it wont hurt him. my daughter is 9 and wants to play football why not.

Hi G.,

I have two boys and they each have their own little kitchen set. I think that it is totally okay. Your husband does not need to worry. Your son's interests will shift to boys stuff soon enough.

Oh I wanna get a kitchen set for my boys who are 6 and 4. They seen one on the Toys r Us website and said mom I want that. They are always in the kitchen with me and my husband helping us cook. My husband and I think it's cool that they want a kitchen set. He see's nothing wrong with them having one and my husband was in the military for 8 yrs. So yeah I think that you should get one for him! Have a great day. =)
K.

There's a great article about this exact subject that I read originally in the Dallas Morning News:

http://www.reporternews.com/news/2007/nov/06/boys-can-pla...

Hi, G.. My son is 29 months old and loves to play with older sister's Dora Kitchen. He cooks, makes me coffee, makes tea for the girls. . . and I see nothing wrong with it. All the men in my family cook and bake and he will be the fourth generation of men who enjoy being in the kitchen. Playing like this enhancese his imagination. . . and when he is done cooking for me he piles his Star Wars figures in the sink and has a little battle. He is, after all, a boy. . . lol. I would say to get the kitchen if he enjoys it. When he gets older he'll also want to help out more. My son already does. . . wants to help cook, clean up, you name it. Hope it helps and good luck. Merry Christmas.

We got our son (2) and daughter (5) a kitchen set too and believe it or not, it's pink! My husband had no problem with this, since he loves to cook!!! I say get it for him!

I think it is perfectly fine to get your boy the kitchen set. My husband is the same way and I told him his way of thinking is outdated. When kids go to day care or child development centers there is always a dramatic play area set up in the classroom. Most include the kitchen with play food, pots and pans and even dress up close and hats and babydolls to diaper. Both the boys and the girls enjoy the dramatic play area. Tell your husband that maybe your boy will grow up to be a world famous chef! Get the kitchen set if he likes to play with it! Good luck! L. S. (I am 40 and have a 2 and 4 year old son and a 20 year old daughter and a 5 months old grandson, also I worked in child care for 8 years.)

We are getting my 18 month old a kitchen set for christmas this year. Kitchen sets are a great developmental toys, it enhances fantacy play which is extremely important, among other things!!!! We had a list of outdoor toys for him, but i figure he'll get a lot of use out of this inside during the winter months, and his birthday is in june, so he'll get summer/out-door toys then.

By now I have taught Bible class to over 100 3 year olds, and I think every single boy loved playing with the kitchen set in the classroom. Tell your husband to watch the Food Network and see how many straight men are chefs!

My husband would feel the same way. Our boys too loved to play with my stuff so I bought them the talking grill with a few things to "cook" on it. My hubby was just fine with that. We even bought the apron and hat to go with it.

I think a kitchen set is a great idea, since that is what he likes to do. I have 3 boys 21,18,15. They all had a baby doll when they were little. (1 is happily married and one is engaged). What a great way to teach them about nurturing, being loving and kind. A kitchen could help teach them about sharing and serving (for lack of a better word). They are only little once, the more things they have access to that teaches them the better off they will be as young men (and that keeps them from staring at a TV or computer) Good luck to you and you wee-one

i think u should take the kid up there and pass him by the kitchen set and see if it catches his attention. if it does, get it. if it doesnt then dont. it doesnt matter what the toy is or if it is meant for a boy or a girl. i played with GI Joes when i was 3 & 4. let your child decide if he wants it.

TTYL

Oh my goodness! I only wish I had posted something a while ago. My son is four and everytime he sees the commercial or any adverstisement for the Rose Petal Cottage he says he wants it. He loves that thing. I wanted to get it for him for Christmas so bad. However, my husband said no way, that it's for girls and if I keep buying him these girly things it'll make him gay! I laughed at him and couldn't even believe he would say that. I do not think what so ever, that would make our son gay. My son also wanted the crash up speedway. I don't know why some men think that if little boys want to play with toys of the opposite sex, they're going to be gay. I told my husband that he cooks, he helps clean and he takes care of our son, so does that make him gay? Of course he said that's different. After reading some of the responses, our son still has some Christmas money coming from grandparents, so he just may get that Rose Petal Cottage after all. He loves to pretend play and I thought it would be something fun for him. G., good luck with whatever you decide to do. Merry Christmas!

It's too bad that some of these women want to restrict your little boy. However I have another suggestion. Just get an inexpensive set of plastic dishes, maybe at a garage sale. It's too late for Xmas but you can still get them. He doesn't know if they are dishes or what they are, he just wants to play with them, and he probably would like the "real thing" at least as well as toys, and maybe even better. And at the dollar store you may be able to find a cheapo pot of some sort too. He can't cook but he can put food onto his very own plastic dishes. Bet that would be fun!

Your son already plays cooking---a kitchen set would be really fun for him and spark his imagination even more. One of my sons is 29, has a bachelor's degree in classical civilizations, a masters degree in documentary film, played baseball in high school and college (traditional masculine sport) and then went to the Cordon Bleu Culinery School in
Austin and now is a chef at the famous Renaissance Hotel in Austin. He had a kitchen set growing up. Most of the famous chefs are male. As my son said when one of his friends questioned him about his kitchen toys when he was little, "Men eat too, you know."

My son LOVES the kitchen set we got for my daughter. My husband even cooks with them.

My boy and girl play together with thier kitchen set. They take turns cooking and surving. If your husband thinks cooking is for sissys, he needs to watch Gordon Ramsey, who is a chef and a former rugby player.

Absolutely, get it for him! If it's something he loves to do then foster it. I have 2 boys and 2 girls, and both of my boys had kitchen sets, dishes, even babies when they were little. They played with it all the time, and then they outgrew it. He'll outgrow it eventually,and if he doesn't then what's the big deal? There are many a great chefs who are men and we all need a few more men who are comfortable in the kitchen, right?

My daughter has twins, boy and girl, that are 3. I got them a kitchen set for their 2nd birthday. They both love it. It is not "girly" at all. I think the box even shows a boy and a girl playing with it. It has the inside kitchen on one side and the outside with a grill on the other. Maybe your husband would be more comfortable with one like that.

Has your husband ever seen Emeril? Or any of the other "man" cooking shows on Food TV or PBS? A lot of little boys (and girls) are probably really interested now because of Ratatouille, and that's a great thing! I'd be with your husband if your son wanted a Bratz styling head (but I guess there's an argument that would make that OK, too!) but a play kitchen would be great for a boy. If it would make him feel better, get some Harley and flame decals and stick on it LOL!!!!

Aren't men weird? My son who is absolutely all boy had a baby doll that he loved for a long time. If he is interested, I say go for it!

My brother is 5 and loves his kitchen set.

Tell your husband the bast majority of famous and well-paid chefs are all male. :-)

Besides - it would definately score some major brownie points when it comes to dating later on in life if your son knows the basics of a delicious meal. *wink*

A. <><

My brother-in-law went through that when he was little. My husband's dad said NO to a kitchen, so they got him a hot dog stand. But I don't see anything wrong with getting a boy a kitchen. Good Luck!!

I have a three year old...and he is also getting a kitchen set. I'm looking at the Little Tykes or Step 2...they also have them in the JCPenny catalog. Absolutely nothing wrong with getting a kitchen set for a boy. Little ones...boy and girl...love imitating what the grown ups do and that includes being in the kitchen. They also love all the gadgets that goes along with it. Just remember how many fabulous male chefs there are out there!
Have a wonderful Christmas and don't worry about your husband...he'll love that his little boy is cooking up some 'wild boar' tamales for him!

If you have not bought it you should. He is imitating what he sees, you preparing food for the family. Encourage your husband to work with him in the kitchen you just might have a budding Chef in the making.

My son's both had kitchen sets and loved them. And they both love to help in the kitchen. I think it is good for men to not only know how to cook for themselves, but also to enjoy the idea of cooking to serve others. The play kitchen is a great place to start that idea.

There's nothing "girly" about a kitchen set...sons naturally want to emulate(sp?) their mothers and its all normal! Especially since the colors are relatively masculine. It just goes to show that the companies marketing these toys see a need for the boys to have them too......Go For It!

Emeril has a better kitchen than I do, any day of the week.

My four year old has a kitchen set, as well as a bat man costume, a love of all things karate, and a baby doll that was mine when I was little and his big sister didn't want it. The doll took some getting used to for my husband - as did my daughter's interest in the outdoors take some getting used to for me. Little boys will grow up to be husbands and fathers, and it is to their advantage (in my opinion) to know that there is more in the world than Rambo.

My 12 year old used to prance around in my high heels carrying a purse. Now he's an offensive lineman on his JHS football team and believes that dress shoes are too girly for him.

S.

I was laughing when I read your post because I am having the exact same issue this Christmas. My 2.5 year old son wants a kitchen set but my husband thinks they are for girls and take up too much room. My solution was to let someone else get it for him. I believe they are fine for boys and I know that boys love to play with them.

I definitely say find a way to get it for him.

Sounds like something MY husband would say also. But I look at it like this....How many successful Male Chefs are there on the Food Network??? Kids don't know the difference between girl and boy things unless they are told. Let your child explore their imagination!!! Remember Mom's know best!!!!

There is nothing wrong with a boy having a Kitchen for Christmas! Kids learn from mimicking adults...he is prob micicking you and his father cooking and using the things around the Kitchen and wants to be like you two. It also helps with the imaginative play.

I am looking into buying the Step 2 Delux Kitchen for my daughter's 2nd birthday and from the reviews from other moms on the Kitchens...that their BOYS love them too. There is nothing wrong with it and hey...he may become a Chef one day or at least be a great cook for his Wife one day!!!! Lord knows we women could all use some more help in the Kitchen!

Get the Kitchen and over rule your Hubby!

I went through the exact same thing with my oldest son. Needless to say, we didn't get him a set, but my Mom purchased one and kept it at her house. He was interested in it until he was about 4 1/2. My middle son loved it to and now he wants to be a chef when he grows up. My 3 year old daughter loves watching martial arts shows and even wrestling and loves to play with balls outside. Believe me, all my children are very much in tune with the gender they are.

Hmmmm....let me think. Who are the great chefs of the world? Men. Tell your hubby to check out the Food Network. Some real hunky chefs on that show. Especially Tyler Florence!

I have a grandson 4 years old now. And I kept my granddaughter kitchen set because it's was so cute it makes all the kitchen noises, running water, timer on stove, frying bacon, boiling water etc....I brought it out when Christian was 2 and put it over to one side of his play room I have for him here at my house. He'd play with it for a little while every now and then but not that much, he was more into boy stuff and he would tell me "that's for girls". When he started pre-school I saw a kitchen set there too, and both boys and girls would play with it. I agree with your husband don't invest your money in this because your son won't play with it for long or that much and that's alot of money to pay (I paid 100 dollars for mine).
Love granny

Hi G.,

Absolutely get him the kitchen set! I have four kiddos and my baby ...he is now 2 1/2 loves his kitchen! In fact Santa brought his last year and he still adores it! Who knows your little boy could grow up and be a fabulous cook! Children play with all types of toys...they should get to be kids...they will grow up soon enough!

C. Farmer
www.lilacleopard.com

I say if he is in to it, buy it!!!!!!

Take note from:
The Naked Chef,
Avril,
The Cooking Chanel-MEN CAN COOK!!!!!!!!!!!

Buy a gift the kid will enjoy and if it is a kitchen, then so be it! This is not the 40's or 50's-Men are versatile just as women are!

T.