Joining the Navy ( Am I Crazy)

Updated on September 15, 2008
S.S. asks from Dallas, TX
5 answers

Ok this is going to be a long post. Let me start out by saying I know it will be awhile before I could even think about joining I have got to lose about 80 pounds before I can even be eliablge. ( i have lost 11 pounds in two weeks though thanks to a 1200 calorie a day diet. I am the mother of 4 children and 25 years old. I didnt finish high school I dropped out and got my GED when I was 16. I have never been able to have the money or the time to go to college like I desperatly want. I work as a bus driver right now and my hubby works also and we are barley making it every month. My hubby also didnt go to college. I have looked in to going to college but I have no idea how I would support my family while I went plus it would take be 4+ years to finish going part time plus all the student loans I would have to pay back. I have been looking in to joining one of the armed forces. I feel like it is something I can do that I can be proud of (which is something I need )plus you can make a very good living at it ( i think ) plus they will help pay for me to go to school. I have been thinking about enlisting in the reserve but I would really love to enlist in active duty. If anyone out there is or was enlisted in either please give me some info about what to expect . Also I would love input from other moms is you think it is selfish for me to want to do this considering I do have 4 kids (b/c I could be deployed overseas )Does anyone know anything about base life can I live on base with my 4 kids and husband? I just want to make somthing out of myself...I want to do more than drive a schoolbus
P.S My father served in the navy as did my husband. my dad served WAY before I was born and my hubby served before we meet and only for a few months he was discharged because of a medical condition.

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So What Happened?

Whell my husband and I sat down and had a LONG talk about me joining. He supports what ever choice I make he knows that this has been a dream of mine for SO long. So for right now I am going to see how much weight I can lose and talk to a few reciuters and see if I can get in the delayed entry program. I know that when and if I join it will not be a magical fix for our financial problems but it will help and it provides me with SO many chances I would never have other wise. I also know that my husband can be a very good mister mom because he was for over a year. When my now two year old was first born I went to work for a trucking company and worked 15 hour days 7 days a week. We lived an hour away from my job. So as SOON as I got home I went to sleep he did everything for our girls. He has no problem doing it again and supports me and my dreams. Thanks for all the advice.

More Answers

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S.W.

answers from Dallas on

What does your husband think about this idea? He's your best, closest, and most honest resource when it comes to knowing what to expect and answering your questions. Plus, if you're sent overseas and your family can't come with you, is he prepared to play the role of both mom and dad while you are gone? Serving in the military is one of the most admirable, if not THE most admirable thing a person can do. But, it may not be the best solution for you.

College doesn't have to be done in 4 years and you don't have to go into debt while doing it. It will require sacrifices, but the military will demand even more. And the military won't let you walk away if you don't like it. My brother took 8 years to get his college degree, but when he finally finished, he had NO loan debt. He paid as he went. Some semesters he could only afford one class, some semesters more. He started at a Dallas Community College for the first few years then transferred to UNT to finish his education. There are lots of great institutions in the area that cost very little per class. Community college is by far the cheapest, followed by state schools like UNT. If you're looking for convenience more than cost, online degree programs like University of Phoenix offer great flexibility for a busy mom like you. And, some employers reimburse employees for education expenses - maybe you could look for a job with an employer that offers this to its employees.

I don't know what all research you've done, but I would encourage you to do some real soul searching. Which is more appealing - 6-12 months away from your family at a time or 1-2 nights away every week for the next 4-5 years? Only you and your family can make that decision. And remember, even after you finish your tour with the military, you'll still have 3-4 years of college to complete. Are you prepared to wait that long if a better education is your ultimate goal?

1 mom found this helpful
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L.F.

answers from Dallas on

I can't really comment on the military portion of this as I have no background in that. However, I can comment on the college portion. There are many grants available to those in your position that would help pay for your education, and as for going part time, it really isn't that bad. Have you looked into any health fields or are you interested in that? Many community colleges offer Associate Degrees with one year programs for things such as Surgical Techs, EMT, Respiratory Therapy, etc. You will have to do your basic classes such as math, science and english, but you can usually get those done in 3 to 4 semesters going part time and then program classes are usually 2 semesters, sometimes 3. From there if you wanted to go further and get your Bachelors to be able to go into management or something like that, alot of times employers will pay for your education. Currently I'm working full time for a hospital system that is paying for me to go to school 100% and get my associates for my RN. They will then pay for me to get my BSN.

So, while I greatly admire your courage to even consider going into the military, please just think about your other options. I would suggest making an appt. with your local community college financial aid office and they can help you figure out everything that you would be eligible for.

Hope this info helps and good luck!!

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G.F.

answers from Dallas on

Wow, alot on your plate - first off, joining the armed forces doesn't remedy your financial situations. My niece has a almost 2 year old (she was never married and father not in the pic, so my SISTER is taking care of her grandchild, just when she started living her life again, please don't do that to your parents, they've already raised their kids) anyway...my niece is going crazy without her daughter - she has had a rough life and thought this was a way out to make a life for herself and her little girl. She is sacrificing time away from her daughter, I mean MONTHS away and is not happy about this, probably wondering if this was a selfish move, not sure.

Is your husband ready to be a mom/dad/financial/emotional supporter for these VERY small children? When they get sick, when they start school, buying all the supplies, running all the errands, store, sick kids, hurt kids? I don't know many Mister Mom's that can handle all that we do. :)I would really advise NOT doing this right now. If you want to take nite classes and get a degree in a field, that would be great - there are grants and information you can look into at the community colleges in your area. You don't have to get student loans that you have to pay back. Go see a guidance counselor at the college and they can direct you, course and financially. I was a bus driver while married -my girls were 5 & 10, plus I went to college to get my RN degree, hard work, BUT with an understanding husband that pitches in with the kids and household work, find a field that you would be good at and GO FOR IT!!! I wish you the best...

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D.S.

answers from Dallas on

S.,

Such a huge decision! I would encourage you to talk to a recruiter but keep in mind that many recruiters say anything to get you to enlist. I was active duty Army for 4 years & my husband is still in (Guard now but being deployed for a second time to Iraq). Personaly, I think serving in the military is wonderful thing and can make a huge difference in your life.
Most duty stations are ones that your family will be able to go to with you. Pretty much the only place they can't go is on deployments such as Afghanistan or Iraq. There will be a lot of time spent away from your family; for training, missions, schools and such. You need to have complete confidence that your husband will be able to handle being a temporary single parent while you are away. What are his thoughts on you enlisting?
A great benefit of service is the healthcare. If you are active duty then you & your family will be covered by Tricare (free healthcare) which is awesome! You will also get to experience living in different places & meeting so many different people.
I can honestly say that joining the military was one of the best things I ever did. I was 21, had dropped out of college due to lack of money, and working in a bar. I joined, did my training and then got stationed in Hawaii. I met my husband while stationed there and now many years later have a lot more going for me than I would have if I had stayed where I was.
I don't think you are being selfish at all. I know many families that either one or both of the parents are active military. It's just a different way of life and one that you need to be sure of before embarking on it. I hope you make a decision that you will be happy with and congratulations on considering the military. Message me if you have any questions or just want to chat about it.

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D.S.

answers from Dallas on

OK here it goes- right now is NOT the time for a mom of 4 to put herself in the position where she can leave the child without a mom and left with a father with obviously a bad enough medical condition to keep him out of the service. #1- I think you need to realize that 4 kids needs to be the max and def not expand the family- #2- You got your GED- good for you- that's an accompishment-dont minimize that.
#3- If you go to a local college and really investigate the funding that is available- you will be amazed. You can also check out scholarships available- There are SO MANY opportunities to get funding for college. You need to make the time to sit and educate yourself about that first. Maybe hubby needs to make a career change as well. Going to college isnt everything- experience and attitude is foremost. I agree that now a days a college degree is almost mandatory to get an interview but don't let that stop you. Maybe venture into a field where they will pay for your schooling- Nursing is a field where they are desperate to get people in- On line degrees is also something to think about. However- NOT having the money for college is almost a better advantage to get the funding- it is out there- See the financial advisor at a local community college first and get the correct info- It will be a lot of paperwork and research but a lot easier than boot camp. Plus- do you really want to drag 4 kids around the world and uproot them school to school and leave family??? Thre are other options- we have lost way too many people in this war- now is NOT the time to do it- If it was a dream of yours than fine- but it sounds like a last ditch effort and there are so many other options- The kids need their mom and seeing her get her GED - get financing and continue her education while being a bus driver and wanting more- is going to make them proud- These kids dont need to be put through the anguish of mom in the military. Lose your wgt- get financial aid and you go girl!
I admire your intent!

D. S

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