Is My 13 Month Old Son Becoming Stubborn.

It's his job to test boundaries. When he bangs his hands on the wall or door he's letting you know he's upset with you (and watching to see what your reaction will be). When my child bangs his hands hard enough that it hurts him, I simply say "Wow - you hurt your hand when you slapped the floor! Ouchy!". Cause and effect. At nap time, if he's poking you, say "Ouch! Poking eyes hurts mommy! No poking!" and if he pokes you again, put him down in his crib or a pack-n-play and say, "Ouch, poking hurts! You are in time out for poking (pinching, pulling hair - whatever)". He will fuss, but it's your job to firmly and gently teach him what's ok and what isn't.

He is not becoming "stubborn" exactly, he's just "becoming" - he's transitioning from being a blob that just ate, slept, pooped, etc. and turning into a thinking being (albiet a primitive one :)

There's a great book - "what to expect the first year" - you can find it at the library, bookstore, half-price-books if they have them in your area, or some used book stores. It'll help you a lot to understand all the developmental stages he'll be going through - the 2nd year is AMAZING as far as what's changing in a child's brain.

Hope that helps :)

You're doing fine. He's still a baby. Don't worry about him becoming "stubborn."

As a mom to two very stubborn little boys, I have to believe that it is not something you can control. They will be stubborn if that is their personality. I mean, my kids are an absolute reflection of me :)

Offer him something he can have before you take something "back". He needs to feel some of his own power. Find ways that he can have this acceptably but keep boundaries for safety. Don't pretend to take a nap..he knows you are faking and he is playing with you. Find another strategy.

It's his job to explore, to reach and poke and grab and examine. He's a little scientist, and will be for several more years. If you got your hands on something interesting, and somebody took it away from you and said "No!," you'd feel frustrated, too. If you had the impulse control of a toddler, you'd probably cry, yell, bang on things, possibly throw a tantrum.

Once we label our kids as willful or stubborn, we risk establishing an antangonistic dynamic instead of a supportive one. This leads to future trouble based on our expectations. Your son sounds completely normal and appropriate for his age.

Try providing desirable and interesting alternatives for the things you need to take away from him, and keep as many no-no's out of his sight as possible. This will make his experience less frustrating for both of you. Since you know he wants to explore your face when you pretend sleep, don't do that – be sure he's been lulled to sleep first. He's only doing what's natural, and if he hasn't become calm enough to nap, he won't be able to. Nor could an adult!