Introducing 2 1/2 Year Old to the Idea of Having a Sibling.

Hi T.,
I am in the same situation. My son will be three in June and I'm expecting in March. I didn't take him to the ultrasound because I didn't want my husband to chase him around. I did take him to one of the appointments to hear the heartbeat. We just found out we're having another boy. My son wanted a sister. We keep telling my son how important it is to be the oldest. I'll say..."Cayden, you'll need to help me give Brody a bath, feed him, rock him, and put him to sleep." He thinks it's the coolest thing in the world. I want him to still feel important. When are you due?
It'll work out. :)

L.

Well what i did with my dauther was I kept reminding her of the baby on a consistant basis. there was never a day missed. I had her talk to him in my belly and I took her with my buying baby stuff. We can't all buy alot of abby stuff so I had her help me refold the clothes over and over again at least once per month. I told her the names of everything. buger picker. nail clipers, burp cloth, onsie. That way when the baby did arive she was busy fetching things for mommy and folding the baby's laundry rather than getting into mischif out of revenge for mommy having another baby in the house. She was fully involved from dipers to trash and bathtime. she did everything with me. Make sure you don't push them away reguarding the baby. Mine was all over me. My tummy was in the way yet she wanted to sit in my lap all the time. I had to make her understand that the baby might get hurt but she had the most fun with her back on my belly when he was kicking. she really started to understand what was going on once she felt him. make it the event of the year that way he'll understand this is a good thing not bad. some kids get even with the new ones for taking MOMMY away but if you keep him doing and helping and shareing with you and baby then he should be fine.

Our son, Keaton, was barely over 2 years old when we took him to an ultrasound appointment. He absolutely loved it. The ultrasonographer surprised us with 3D pictures and Keaton was thrilled with that. We started telling him that "Mama had a baby" and would point to my belly at probably around 12 weeks or so. Pretty soon we turned that into an excited "Where's the baby?" and later "Where's baby brother?" Keaton would be so proud to point to his own belly and tell us that's where the baby was. When we had our new son (he's about 4 months old now) Keaton was so happy to meet him and has shown no resentment or aggression towards the baby. We see Keaton kiss the baby several times each day. I have to wonder if the experience has been because we made the whole thing so positive from the start?

Good luck!

OK, I know he's a Boy. But a baby doll really helps. you can teach him how to take care of it and explain that you guys are going to have a real baby soon too. This also helps when baby does get here cause he can sit wih you and hold his own baby while you hold yours. My husband gave me kind of a funny look when I did this but it really helped my son when his sister was born.

H.

http://wisemommy.fourpointmoms.com

I had bought a baby doll and had them treat it carefully like it was real i held it and had my boy help out My son was pleased when baby was born and it is important to let him help you like picking out a toy to give, like what do u think <babys name> would like to play with picking out clothes for the baby to wear.... worked for me i have 3 boys
~H.~

I think taking your son to all appointments is a great idea!
My daughter has been to all of my appointments and LOVES to listen to the heart beat. She'll be three in March and she understands completely the concept of mommy having a baby in her belly and being nice to my belly and everything in between.

Congratulations. We took our two and a half year old to the ultrasound appointment to see the new baby. We also checked out positive books from the library. Once your son turns three he can atend the big sibling class held at the hospitals. They teach te kids how to diaper and swadle newborns. We also told our son that the new baby would be his own brother and that no other kid would get to be the big brother. He took this ownership very seriosly and is very protective and loves his now 7 week old brother. My son also told us at first that he did not want a baby brother he wanted a girlfriend, they soon become very excited about the whole event. I would avoid any books or videos that help kids deal with the problems of baby's like being left out or not getting as much attention from mommy and daddy, unless these thing actually occur when the baby is born. If the experience is brought positively the kids are thrilled and excited about the process. Try andd introduce them slowly to the new baby idea, waiting for 9 months is a very long time for a soon to be big brother.

I think you're husband has a perfect idea. My daughter was barely two when we took her to the "big u/s" appointment. It was at one of those u/s places that have the big rooms with big screen where everyone on the room can see the u/s. I got a 3D one with pictures and a video and I can tell you that it helped tremendously with her. she got so excited! And she wanted to watch the u/s video everyday until I had my son, I think that's what helped the most. We would watch the video and talk about baby Michael in my belly and how much time left until he would come to live with us. I see from your profile that you are still early on in your pregnancy. As your belly gets bigger, he'll start to get more curious about what's going on and if you talk to him about it everyday, he will eventually get it. Do you have any friends or family members with newborns or babies? Meeting with them might help as well. Congratulations and good luck!

Well I have a daughter who just turned 3 last month and last month I also gave birth to a baby boy... I took my daughter to all the ultra sound appts, she loved it!!! I also bought this thingie at Walmart ( I think ) that you put around your belly and you can hear the heart beat and stuff... I used that with her and she loved it being able to hear the baby. I just kept telling her every month that the baby was going to be here soon and that she was going to be a big sister and that if she wanted to help, I could find ways to include her in helping with the baby. Its hard at that age because they dont quite understand it, but keeping them up to date and showing them pictures of what the baby looks like every month is good too... I would sit down with my child and tell her, now this month our babys lungs are getting strong, or whatever. I would show her pictures of what a baby at 7 weeks looked like, then at 8 weeks, and so on... Also near the end I took her shopping, she picked out whatever she wanted to for her new baby brother. Also another good idea, you wont use for a while but what I did since my daughter WAS an only child until the baby got here, I bought her gifts before I went into have the baby but didnt give them to her unless someone who came to visit gave me a gift for me or the baby, that way you are showing your child that he is special too and that you havent forgotten him. My daughter loved it, since the baby and her both got gifts...
But back to your question, I would for sure take your son to the ultra sound appts, and keep him up to date about whats happening with the baby, that just helps them understand a little bit better.
Good luck!!!

when i was pregnant with my daughter, i gave my son his own "baby". just one of his toys he likes (which was usually ernie from sesame street) and i always told him it was important to be nice to the baby and use gentle touches. then i would explain that mommy was gonna have her own baby too and that he could help me take care of her. he was excited, he would kiss my tummy and say my tummy was his baby, he would try to feed his ernie doll and put him to bed with a blanket. after the baby was born, he was the same way with her. for the first 6 weeks, he kissed her constantly, all day long. he would try to give her a pacifier and hug her and put blankets on her. he still gets upset and crys when she crys. and tells people not to touch her.

I would wait to really introduce him to the idea until you're showing. Pregnancy is a long wait for us, let alone a child. We told our 5 yr old earlier on, only because I had a complication early on and we had to explain why I was in the hospital. For our now 4 yr old, we told him once I started showing and the baby started moving. Our kids went to the ultrasound appts, but mainly they made faces at the pictures and didn't really get what they were seeing.

I would just suggest waiting until a little further along and then involve him in picking things out for the baby. We also talk a lot about when our two older ones were babies...which they enjoyed a lot. We point out babies at the store and talk about what the baby will be like when he's born and what good helpers they will be. There are a few good children's books out there that talk about bringing home a new baby.

If you have a spare bedroom that you plan on making a nursery I would suggest making it a big boy room. Help him "graduate" from being the baby to the big brother. If you can afford it, buy him a big boy bed, let him help pick out his big boy colors or theme. That way when he see's you decorating or buying new stuff for the baby it will make it easier cause he's a big boy now and doesn't need baby things. Then turn his old room in to the nursery. I think there are many ways to help excite him into becoming a big brother.....

B.