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Thanks for everyone advice even though i have all of his information they can't seem to find him. I even them his email but nothing they just keep telling me to fine an address for him. Which i did try and even ask his parents but still nothing. But i really wont his last name changed to my soon to be husband that way everybody can have the same last name. As far as using the name for school in what i would rather it be done legal. Hoping that i wouldn't have to get a lawyer. I just hope everything works out okay!

Updated

Yes i really want to do it in its not right that i have to get him involve when he don't won't to be. But i will do the ad and get some help from a lawyer.

Your state's court website should have the basic info that you need. As a general rule, if the birth father is listed on the birth certificate you do need to notify him and get him to sign the name change form. His signature needs to be notarized. If you can't find him, you have to prove that you can't find him and there are specific steps to follow to prove that he can't be located. After you follow those steps, then you can publish a notice in the newspaper of his last known address and then after that runs, that is considered notice and if he still doesn't reply, you can proceed with the name change.

If the father isn't on the birth certificate and hasn't been named as the father in any court proceedings (child support, visitation, paternity) then he has no legal rights and you are free to proceed without his permission.

In either case, you'll need certified copies of the birth certificate so order one if you don't have one already.

ETA: Please ignore the response that indicate that your fiance needs to adopt your son or that your son's birth father has to give up his parental rights for you to change his name. Those statements are simply not true. All you need is his notarized permission for the name change on the name change petition. This permission has NOTHING to do with parental rights or adoptive status. I know this because my husband initially agreed to a name change for his daughter when she was 5 from her mother's maiden name to her step-father's name. When her mom left the step-father, we then changed her name (with the mother's agreement) to my husband's last name and that will be her last name until she's an adult. Neither of these changes were related to changes in custody, marital status or adoption.

For your younger son, you and your fiance can fill out the forms to change his name to whatever you want, whenever you want. You can do that before or after your wedding or have both boys done at the same time once you get the older boy's father's permission (if he is legally recognized as the father - if he's not, then you can just do both boys together).

It depends on your state, but I just googled "how to change a child's last name" and there were dozens of sites that popped up, many describing the same situation you're in.

For the oldest, the bio-dad will have to give up his parental rights and once married, your husband would need to adopt him.

As for the younger, since the man you are marrying is his father, you should be able to petition the court through some documents to change the birth certificate.

I am not sure if a name change like that would effect their SSN#s.

Your husband will have to adopt your son to give him his name, once you are married.

I'm not sure you can unless he becomes adopted. You'll have to get the father's permission to do that.

last name is K.

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When I got married, my daughter just used my husband's name. For school purposes, etc, they had all her legal information, but they referred to her by a different last name on her report cards, etc. It wasn't a big deal.

If you want to legally change the name, it can be more tricky because the father has a right to object to it.

Check the laws in your state.

You can just do a name change. You can change the name to anything you want so if you want to give him your soon-to-be husband's last name, you can do that. You can also change your youngest son's name so all of you will have the same last name.

You should check with a local attorney for the procedure. Here in CA, you file the Petition, advertise in a newspaper of general circulation for about 6 weeks, I think, and then if no one objects, the judge will grant the name change. It's not hard.

Good luck! And congrats on the upcoming nuptuals!

When I looked into getting my daughter's last name changed, I was told that I needed to get her father's permission. He was not inolved in her life so I was perturbed that I even had to ask him. Plus I had to advertise it in the local paper where he lived in order to give him a chance to object. We ended up waiting until she was 18 and didn't need his permission.

If you really want to do this... I don't necessarily think its a good idea if the real dad has been around at all... But if he hasn't and you really want to do this. You should get dad1, to sign away his rights so the new man can legally adopt him. That's how this will work. You can't just take part of the kids identity away, it really should be up to him, and he really needs to be a part of the conversation not how his bio dad is not around but how much he is loved by your fiancé and how it would be his honor to adopt him because he loves him and want everyone to know it. Proceed with caution. Sticky situation. Good luck.

You can always call your Vital Statistics/State Register office (they handle birth, death, marriage certs) and ask them. I use to intern there years ago (15+) and they were always getting calls of these nature. They should be able to guide you. Or they may have a website.