iJFF ~ What Are You Doing?

When I was young and super good looking, I didn't really believe it. I was way too self-conscious about how I looked, what I said, what I did. The older I get, the more self-confident I become. I loved my 40s and my 50s are going great so far! I had my daughter at 41 and am more active and as involved as a parent of any age.

I don't and never will drive a minivan or station wagon.
I will not be part of the PTA or any school fund-raising group (I do contribute).
I don't "dress like a mom" and am still a size 6 and wear a bikini to the pool.
I am a relaxed, easy-going, free range parent.
I still play on playground equipment and my daughter knows I can beat her in sparring (she's a brown belt, I'm a black).

I love being an older mom!

We definitely got braver, didn't we?!

Never get married
Never be dependent (aka not working)
Never move back home
Never live in Seattle
Never, Never, Never so many things

In my own life, I've found I nearly always end up choosing that which I fear the most. I may not be happier for it, but Im definitely a lot less afraid. Not because it all went well*, but because I know I can handle anything with a little bit of chutzpah, regardless of my luck or plans.

Several years ago I stopped, looked around myself, and realized

"I have everything I never wanted, nothing that I did, and I've never been happier."

Mostly, I've learned to trust my judgement... Which might seem antithetical... But it's my judgement in the MOMENT. That, really, when choices are presented to me I'll choose the best one for me at that time. Instead of trying to square peg and round joke forcing things to follow the ideas of someone who didn't know what she was talking about, because I hadn't actually walked that road, yet. <grin> I've made some bad choices. But I've also LEARNED from them (sheesh, at least I HOPE I have!).

What a loooooong
Strange trip it's been...

I said I would never be like my father ............ and I fight every day with myself and catch him in me with my kids. I hate it so much.

He was not patient, and I tend not to be.
He was antsy , and I am that too.
He gets annoyed easily.... and I do as well with tiny noises and clipping of the nails and consitant " noise " . UGH , wish I was not like him !
I have Bat Ears....but that is another post another day !

I am truly getting better, but it is a effort daily. I really thought I would never ever be like him !

I swore my kids would NEVER eat at McDonalds, but our "fry fixes" seem to happen about once a month. I surprise them with a trip through the drive thru and it's worth it.

No minivan. Drove one for eight years and the best day was when I got rid of it!

Mom clothes? Well.... I am trying to age with dignity and grace. I simply can't carry off some of the current looks at my age, so I try to keep my appearance pulled-together with some style to it. I always wanted my husband to look across the room at a party and say "yeah, that's MY wife over there", so I keep the weight in check, too. It's sort of working!

I am much more protective than I thought I would be. I pictured myself as the relaxed, easy going, free range parent. That didn't happen. I am trying to balance my protectiveness with fostering independence. It's sort of working!

I love this post, L.! I can't wait to see the other answers!

I said I would never drive a minivan - ha
I would never give my kids french fries or chicken nuggets - ha
My kids would never have messy faces - ha
My daughter would never have stringy hair - ha
I would never go out without makeup - ha
We would still go out and have fun by getting babysitters - ha ha ha ha

I think the biggest thing for me was as a teenager I said I would just die if I ever wore a size 7. Good thing I didn't have a crystal ball into my future! I would love to wear a size 7 right now, I'm just not willing to give up my goodies. : )

I like to think I am still young (I'm only 27!) cool and super good looking lol. I said I would never sit my kids down in front of the tv when they were real little. Well when you need a shower Seasame Street is your best friend.

I never had a problem with the whole minivan or "mom" look (I think older women who try to dress like their daughters look stupid).....even as a single 21 year old my dad teased me about helping me buy a minivan and I thought "Cool! I could fit 5 more friends than can currently fit in my stupid broken Fiat Spyder!"
I didn't have a lot of nevers because I was open for "whatever", but I was pretty serious about never getting married (and I am)....never being "dependent" on anyone especially a man (I'm a sahm)....I wanted to have a ranch and help children, but I didn't see me with my own.....I have 2 and can't imagine life without them.