IEP Request-finally!

Is this public school or private school?
Big difference.
Private schools, often, do not have, SPED departments or SPED trained and certified, Teachers. They don't have to.
Regular Teachers, are NOT "SPED" teachers. They have, different education and degree backgrounds.

Public schools, have SPED departments and SPED Teachers, and they provide Aides to children with an IEP and need and Aide, with them, in school, in class etc.
"SPED" means special education.
It is State and Federal mandated.

"Section 504", provides protections against discrimination in employment/accessibility and education or individuals with disabilities.
It is not a "special education" law. It is a civil rights law. That places responsibility upon each school to provide equal education opportunities for all students.

"IDEA" is also a a federal law. It stands for "individuals with disabilities education act). Look this up. It establishes laws that the States must follow.

An IEP, is an individual education plan, that is SPECIFIC to the needs of an individual, for the child's learning. Hence, each child who needs it, will have a different "plan."

There is also "FAPE." which denotes Free, Appropriate,Public Education for all disabled children regardless of degree of severity of handicap. This Public Law, protects the rights of the children and their parents in educational decisions etc. and requires that an IEP be developed for the child etc.
Look this up as well.

There are 6 major provisions.... of the IDEA that must be implemented.
One of which is, due process and that the decisions of the school system can be challenged by the family etc.

Per the public school that my kids attend: The first person to contact for a concern/IEP is the Principal. The school also has a department that only deals with students with special needs and who need an IEP. That department coordinates... the process. And whatever else happens and is needed in conjunction, with the family.
A child needs to be assessed first. As well.
It is a complex process. That is handled in the school system.
And there are so many variables and processes to it, that each situation will be different. It is not a one sized shoe fits all.

The IEP and any Aide that is assigned to him, will be per SCHOOL, and his education as a student.
Outside of that, per any Therapist/Psychiatrist/Psyhologist or whatever, that you have for him, is not a "school" employee or evaluator.
But your own private Doctor for him, may be, or will be used in conjunction with, whatever is planned for him at school.

Again, it is very complex.
And each school, processes this... differently.
So you need to check with YOUR school, on it and what do do, next.
So just ask them "Since you recommended an IEP for my son... WHAT happens next???? What do we, need to do????"
And also put it in writing, document things, etc.
Again, each school processes this and handles it, differently.
At my kids' school, public school, they are very pro-active.
But each school, is different.
So I cannot address, your son's school process.
This is just an example. So take it as, an example.

I work at a school. Elementary school.

The school is NOT your friend! I repeat, NOT your friend.
They will act all nicey nice but do not be fooled! Their priority is the school. Its unfortunate but our schools are running on shoestring budgets. Often they are short sighted in seeing that giving a little more to one will actually improve the experience for ALL involved.
Prepare an agenda of items you wish to cover. Ask open ended questions - Ie. "If Billy does this or needs that, what is the school prepared to offer?" Take notes. Do not go into an IEP meeting alone and don't sign anything right then and there. Announce you forgot your reading glasses & will need to take the paperwork home to read before signing. Start researching Student Advocates in the area. If for nothing else at least consult with one. If you can, hire one to go with you.
Also, I've heard good things about Eton Academy (Oakland County). Don't know if that might be an option for you.
You are his mom, his first teacher, you know him best. Stay strong & don't forget no ones loves him like you! Good Luck!!
P.S. Happy Birthday Big Guy! :o)

It took my DIL until my GD was 13 to get her diagnosed, an IEP and an educational placement that suits her! Like Linda B says, the school is NOT your friend. They don't want to do anything about a diagnosis because that means they will have to provide services.

Look outside the school district. Call your county's mental health department and find somewhere to have him undergo extensive testing. Once my DIL got that done for my GD, the therapists at the testing center came to the IEP meeting with her and they really ran the meeting. My DIL said all she had to do was sit there. The advocates were wonderful and they got my GD so many accommodations and a placement in a school where she has a full-time aid, is in special ed classes, but also mainstreams for PE and cooking class. Again, her aid is always with her so she is never alone. It is WONDERFUL.

Our place here is called North Bay Regional Center. I'm sure your mental health department can provide you with some information and assistance in getting this done.

BTW, I knew my GD had problems from the moment she was born. None of the other family members would even consider it and in fact when I actually spoke the word "autistic" I was lectured and looked down upon by all of them. They are all a bit contrite now!

This isn't really the question you asked (sorry). But I want to say - you might reconsider online school. I say this for 2 reasons.
1) If his anxiety is interfering with his ability to learn in school, his actual education will be better if he can learn in an environment where he is not anxious.
2) I know you are concerned about socialization. But you can get that other ways. If he is doing online school, he is still entitled to participate in all school extracurricular activities. So get him into all the school clubs, sports, whatever he is interested in. In our school, I know of one child how does his academic classes elsewhere, but comes to our school for enrichment that he isn't available at his private school. He comes over for just 2 classes per day. With this kind of strategy, maybe you can find other ways to get him the socialization he needs without having his anxiety interfere with his educational success.

And I do think that you need a psychiatrist and psychologist on board. And if your current doctors are only asking you questions and not suggesting strategies for him, then yes, I think you need new doctors.

Definitely DO NOT go strictly by what the school recommends. They will recommend the least amount of therapy/assistance possible, largely due to financial constraints. You need to talk to his doctor and his therapist and get info from them about what they think would help your son function best at school. You should also talk to other parents with kids on the spectrum and see what they have included in their IEPs - what works, what doesn't work, what they wish they could change, etc.

It's really, really important that you be a very strong advocate for your son right now. The school is not going to give him what he really needs unless you fight for it. There are even special ed advocates and lawyers out there who can help you create an IEP and help you negotiate with the school.

You have to ask "IN WRITING" copied to teacher, principal, and the school district office for a case study to be done on your son. They have 30 days to complete the case study and present to you the IEP plan for your child. The IEP should provide for the least restrictive environment in which he can learn. They should be able to put him into smaller classrooms. Perhaps have an aid in the classroom. They will not suggest that he have all his class time online. Good luck

Hi, I am a school psychologist and in my district all you have to do is request an evaluation through the schools. As a parent, you have the right to this! Even if he has an outside private diagnosis, he would still have to go through the school's evaluation process, but it may just speed things up a bit. Now, not sure how exactly your district works, but it should be pretty similar. If he is having difficulty in school, he would have to go through the RtI process, which is a series of interventions that have to be put in place before assuming a child has a disability. I do believe that RtI is now a nation wide process, so you should have the same thing in your district, but it may just be called something different. Please just ask the school, it's amazing how many times I realize that there is so much that parents are just not aware of. They should be able to guide you in the right direction.

I am confused, in your OP you said his diagnosis is extreme anxiety, then in the what happened you said he has a diagnosis of ADHD. To get there he had to have already been tested. The diagnosis of ADHD is enough to get an IEP in place and is probably why you are getting one.

My kid's doctor always asks me more than the kids. For one I am an observer, I can see the effects of different meds, they just shrug their shoulders. When they are young they cannot articulate how the feel in meaningful terms.

So how I got there, I brought the kids in and the doctor did his work. I think what concerns me about your post is you think he has spectrum. So you are looking at the doctors as wrong because they did not confirm that. Sure they could be wrong but then so can you. I can assure you there is little difference between ADHD and high functioning autism. I should know, I brought my third in for an eval for ADHD, all my kids have ADHD, he was found to also be high functioning autism. He was not formally diagnosed until he was six because it is too difficult to get it right when they are younger.

Anyway my point is chances are you are wrong and trying to get an inaccurate diagnosis isn't going to change what services your son gets. My younger son has spectrum, my younger daughter only has the ADHD, the both receive the exact same services.

I'm sure you have been - but just in case . . . document EVERYTHING.

If you have a meeting or a phone call, summarize it from your notes and email that person with the summary. If they disagree with your understanding of what was said, then you'll have a paper trail.

It's often a battle, and can involve complex issues, so it will help to have everything organized in one place and at your fingertips, and you won't have to rely on your memory for every little detail.

He should be seeing a child psychiatrist about the anxiety. Your son's therapist may be able to recommend someone to you or even make the referral. A child psychiatrist is the specialist physician who can address anxiety. Our son has anxiety in a number of forms (OCD, generalized anxiety and he's recovering from an eating disorder related to food anxiety, among this long list of conditions). He sees a psychiatrist, who handles the medication component, and a therapist, who handles the coping strategies.

At nine, you're right that he should be a part of the process. Our son in 10 and his doctors talk with him directly about a lot of the issues. When he was a lot younger, it really was just us as parents talking with the doctors primarily because it was hard for him to communicate exactly what he was going through.

I wouldn't go with simply what the school recommends. Start looking online about what accommodations you can get for the anxiety (one that our son gets is that he's not marked down for showing anxiety when doing presentation, since he's diagnosed with anxiety). Educate yourself as much as you can before you get everything in writing, no matter how much you think the educators are on your side. Wright's Law is one site full of information.

Good luck!

Please do your own research on what a 504 plan and an IEP are for. They each legally have boundaries and areas that are covered that are addressed. This information will help YOU go forward well armed to be your child's advocate.

Finding an evaluation source is the biggest hurdle. Do you have a teaching college/university medical center nearby? Does it have a children's hospital?

If it you can find one and they have a children's developmental clinic they will likely do evaluations.