Ideal Child Spacing for Large Families

as it stands we have 4 under the age of 6 still at home right now. oldest is 5 youngest is 16 months. a 3 and 2 in between. I really recommend the best spacing is potty trained or on the verge of. we have 3 in diapers right now and its a real challenge.

Okay, I have five kids, 12 (13 in Sept), 11, 7 (8 in Sept), 5, & 10 months. The first two were 22 months apart, then 3 years, then 3 years, then four years. The first two, that was a nice age spread, they played very well together. WHat I have seen now that they're older is that the oldest is wanting his own life and cutting his brother out (although that happens with bigger spreads, it just seemed to affect Ty a lot cause they were so close for so many years). With the 22 months, they enjoy the same things at the same time. The 3 years is okay, a little far out for my taste. But, then the 4 years was out far enough that I am really getting to enjoy my youngest 'individually', I have more patience. BUt then I am older, too. Good luck with having a large family. I hope you like minivans! ;o)
M.

I'm a mother of ten children here in Eau Claire, WI...not that far from you. I've had children 1.5 to about 3 years a part....most of them 2 yrs. apart. Believe me, I'd prefer the 3 years apart gap. It gives me time to loose weight...get in shape in between...that one on one time for a couple of years with the current baby, etc.

I never had any complications...had mostly home births that went just fine...even with one being breach...he came out fine and is a healthy 14 year old now.

After having had 10 over 22 years (they are now 25 down to 4), I would recommend whatever amount of children you have....have them so they are at least teenagers by the time you turn 45 to 50...it's no fun combining raising little ones with menopause, etc. Believe me, I know. But I'm glad I have them all....grace & thankfulness is needed every day.

I don't know if you're a Bible believer, but I sure clung to scriptures like... "Shall I bring it to the birth and not cause it to come forth?" Isaiah 66:9 Only had my first child induced for the doctor's scheduling purposes. After that they all came in due time just fine naturally.

Also, I like Psalm 127 esp. vs. 3 "Lo, children are an heritage of the Lord: and the fruit of the womb is His reward." So true.

Hope this helps.

Hi J.,
I have 4 children ages 15,12, 2 and 10months. I really liked the spacing between my 2 older children they are 3 years apart. It was nice having only one kid in diapers at a time. and by the time i had my 2nd child my oldest was alot easier to take care of. Now with my younger 2 I have 2 kids in diapers which can get pretty costly and my 2 year old is very difficult and needs to be watch all the time. I find that things are alot harder with them spaced closer together. So in my opinion having the kids about 2 1/2 to 3 years apart is good. pluse you want to try to not have too many birthdays in one month. It can be pretty costly.

According to a pyschologist the perfect age between children is 6years apart. I know some would agree with that and some wouldn't agree with that. I'm a single mom and my daughter is 5 I hope to get married and have more kids it bothers me that if I do they will be so far apart but I will have a nice babysitter as a perk out of it. Also I grew up in a mixed step family with 6kids. WE had a newborn, 4yr.old, 6yr.old, 10yr.old, 11yr.old(myself) and 15yr.old We never went anywhere as a family because it cost to much or we so many differnt ages we all wanted to do something different. My parents always had a babysitter though myself or my mean older brother. I was close with my younger brother growing up becuase we were only a year apart, I loved having a newborn brother at age 11 I loved helping out. I didn't have anything in common with or just didn't want much to do with the other silbings mostly due to our ages we were to far apart. To this day I'm now 26 I'm still closest to my brother who is a year younger. I specifically remember being jealous because the yougner kids got all the attention and I felt invisible alot. I was expected to help out all the time and sometimes I had alot of responsibility pushed on me and I couldn't just be a kid. I hope this helps maybe...

I just have 3 and they are all 2 years apart. I really enjoy that spacing. It gives me time to enjoy the baby before the next pregnancy starts draining your energy.

I know this is a topic that has many diffrent views, but I can tell you from my own personal experince.
My son and daughter are 5 years apart. Everyone was telling me that my son would have issues with being the only child for so long. But he accepted my daughter full hearted and he is a great big brother. He helped me with bottles and picking out clothes, ect. He only wanted to hold her for a short periods of time and then off he went to play.
Now they are 5 and 10, and they play all the time togather. They even have similar intrests, and hardly argue.
I had anouther daughter 4 years later. My girls are 4 years apart. My youngest is turning 2. I think as girls they have similar intrests, like dolls and cartoon charters. They play nice togather as well. I think it is a good idea to wait 3-5 years inbetween, becaues the older children look out for the younger children and they can also be good role models.
Hope that helps!

J.
I only have one so far but my sister-in-law had 3 in 3 yrs., all boys, all c-sections and they have a 4th due in Jan.(a girl!) Their youngest is a little over 2 now. I don't know how my sister-in-law did it because pregnancy is very hard on her(sick, exhaustion) but she has never had any complications. Now that none of the boys are really babies anymore, they play together really well and are very excited for their new sister on the way.

We have four kids. Our first two are only 14 months, and 4 days apart. Our second two, are twins, who are 3 years and 5 days apart from the middle child. My twins are WAY easier than having the two 14 months apart. With them so close, I've found that they go in a piggy back style, through stages. So when one is leaving the terrible twos, the other is just starting. I love how close they are though. (they are both boys!) And how much they have in common now. Right now, we don't really have a middle child, it worked out nice for us, with two and two.

Anyway! What I was going to say, is that after having the two fourteen months apart, it sure was nice to have the three year break in between. It made a WORLD of difference in my pregnancy, to not be carrying a baby, and then chasing a toddler right after delivering!!!

So, for us, it worked out well, but I would really reccomend, if you have two close together(like it sounds like your 2nd and 3rd will be) that there be a few years in between. Not only to let your body recover from two pregnancies close togehter. But also, when your kids are a little older (as I'm sure you see with your 5 year old right now) they can enjoy your pregnancies with you!!

Good luck with the rest of your pregnancy, and with your decision on when to have more!!!

J.

Mom to

Dallas (5-4-01)
Gabriel (7-8-02)
Kaleb and Kendyl (7-13-05 b/g twins)