I Want Another Baby!!!

Remind him it takes the baby roughly 10 months to cook and however many months to conceive...so really he wouldn't see the baby for at least a year!!!

I personally do not think you should convince him. Instead you need to talk to him about the topic and come to an agreement. If this becomes one sided and he does not want a child and you do and a baby is brought into the relationship it might cause much hardship. Remeber this is another life your talking about so the topic should not be a lite one. How would you feel if you were being pushed to make a life change you were not sure you were ready for?

On the other hand my girls are 5 1/2 years apart I personally love this fact because I have been able to give each one there own mommy time ( love this fact). There are many draw backs to it thought. It is hard at times. When my oldest was 5 we had to opt out of doing things because she had a baby sister. I think in many aspects it would of been easier to have them closer together because I feel like my oldest now has missed out on many things. I guessif you had family around and a babysitter you trusted this would not be that bad. I did not have that! Now we are at the stage little sister adores big sister and wants to play with her and big sister has better things to do. I know this might sound like a tipical sibling action but most of my freinds that have kids closer togather have it easier because there kids play together where mine fight a lot. Finally it SUCKS being a only CHILD I know first hand!

Hi J.,
I am just writing because I know the feeling of wanting another baby. My husband and I tried to have a baby for 1 1/2 yrs. Then when I got pregnant and had her, he didn't want anymore. Being that it took soo long to get pregnant, I never thought that I would have another one. She was 6 months old when I found out I was pregnant again. I was thrilled, my husband FREAKED!!! After my second one was born, I was back at the doctors when she was only 8 wks old, hearing the doctor say "Congratulations, your going to have another baby". Imagine how my husband was when he heard that. In fact, I told him by saying "If I was going to tell you something that would upset you, when should I tell you?" He was on his way to work. He said "only two things would make me upset. You either wrecked the car, or your pregnant." I said "I didn't wreck the car." He left for work, and didn't come home for 10 hours. He had time to think. Guys don't look at children the same way we do. They see dollar signs. It scares them. I know that God will take care of us. I don't worry about the finances. Why? Worrying is in God's territory. My husband eventually was alright about it. A year later, we had our 4th baby. I don't believe in birth control. So, our blessings were great. I thought. Your husband just has to get used to the idea. Don't push him. When it is your time to get pregnant, whether your trying or not, you will. I have 4 beautiful children. 8, 7, 6, and 4 1/2. Our life is great. However, I wanted more, and my husband didn't. Well, God interveined and because of medical reasons, I can't have anymore. It is very difficult at times. I would LOVE to have more. But, I have to know that God has a reason.
I hope that this helps. When it is your time, you will have another baby. The hard part, is waiting. I will pray for you.
T.

J. ~ Congrates on your little one. I find the men sometimes concerned with how the relationship dynamics are going to change. They changed once with your first, what will change with a second?? I suggest you make HIM feel special, make HIM feel really important. Share with him your thoughts/dreams, help him to have them become his too – DON’T PUSH the subject though. They PUSH back with subjects that they feel are pushing on THEM. GOOD LUCK.

Always remember the decision should be made by both of you since both lives will be affected.

Have a respectful conversation with him, airing your desires but also listening to his side of the story. What if the tables were turned and you weren't ready to have a baby and totally stressed about it yet your husband kept pushing, pushing, pushing? Just like you have valid reasons as to why you want another one, he may also have valid reasons as to why he wants to wait. Try to reach some sort of compromise based upon both of your needs and wants.

Let's say your husband came home from work one day and said "Honey, I want to move across the country to California. Pack your bags and let's go now!" How would you feel if every night he convinced and nagged you to make this happen? How might you react to that huge life change?

If your husband isn't ready, have two-way communication to find out why he isn't. Listen to him, be patient, and consider his feelings too. It's not just your life that will change - everyone's will.

J.,
Don't push him, but give him all the positives about having another baby... they will have an at home playmate. We planned on only having one, but we lived in a very rural setting, away from most other children. We decided it would be a good idea for us to have another so that our first would have someone to play with. I read a lot of parenting magazines back then and they said if your going to have a second child, do it before the first one is two and able of feeling jealousy, or after the age of four when your first child feels secure with their place within the family.

I didn't want two in diapers at the same time and my husband agreed that having two small ones would be a lot of work. So, we waited until my first was four, and without even knowing it I got pregnant again.

I always enjoyed being pregnant, but having the four years between also gave my body some time to get close to its original shape, which made me more appealing to my husband.

My girls are now 8 and 4, and when they are getting along, they play wonderfully together... also, two kids seemed like a magic number for us... this way both can play and no one get left out.

I had my tubes tied after our second, and they are times when I still want to have another baby, but I don't regret my decision, especially when I hear the giggles of both of my girls coming from they shared bedroom!

Give him time and be consious of his feeling... but tell him talking about it won't make it happen and assure him that it's a decision that you have to make together... and think about waiting untill Karina is four, she would make a great mother's little helper (by getting diapers, and wipes for you), once she is old enough to enjoy her younger sibling!

Good luck!

I can only make suggestions. My little one is nearing 18 months and I love her to bits. Now, I do want more children, but I'm still paying for this one (hospital bills from her birth). When you want to have more children really is a personal choice, some have them close together and say it's better, some space them out a bit. I'm all for spacing them out. 3-4 Years seems good, that way you'll have one out of diapers before you have another back into diapers. Also a 3-4 year old doesn't need you so much and you can explain things a little better about how the baby needs you more and you can even get them to help you a little. Like handing you the bottle or getting you a blanket.

Try asking your husband how long he wants to wait until baby number 2. He's part of it so his input is important too.

Enjoy the little one you have now, give her all your attention while you can, because once baby 2 comes along she won't have you all to herself and that can be rough on a child.

Good luck.

There are many hardships with little children, but that's only the right now. And so many blessings. As for the right now, you may have to wait a while, but people do have complications, and have to wait a long time, and you never know if you are one them(I was). Do you EVER hear anybody say they regret having one more child???

I kind of look at it for a moral standpoint. I'm anti-artificial birth control, and I think whatever God wants to bless us with is great. We use Natural Family Planning, which really has an openness to life, but also, you can avoid conception, by looking at your fertility signs. I like Couple to Couple Leage, www.ccli.org. Perhaps you can study up on it and try to convince him of that. It's great for couples! Very low divorce rate, communication, etc.

Good luck!

I just posted to another post similar to this.

We didn't want kids at all. Then, I did. Then, he agreed (willingly, I didn't force him). Then, I miscarried twice. I wanted to give up. It was DH that actually convinced me that we try one more time. Our son will be three in June. When Jacob (son) was a little over one, I wanted another baby. Jacob was a difficult infant (bad colic). So, when I told my husband I wanted another one, he said, "Are you sh*tting me?". Well, I let it sit and a couple of weeks later, I mentioned it again. I told him I understood and respected if he didn't want another, but I really did. He asked me to just let the idea sink in with him for awhile. I did. I didn't nag or push him. About a month later, I asked him how he was feeling about it and I showed him how we could do it (financially) and about 6 weeks later I was pregnant with our second son. Our boys are 26 months apart and I LOVE it. Sure, it's hard sometimes, but it's so much fun.

So, if you've told your hubby, let it sink in. He's thinking about it, I'm sure. Don't nag him, but ask him what his reasons are for NOT wanting #2. When he tells you, don't discredit those reasons. Instead, think about them from his perspective. They may seem silly to you, but to him they are valid. You know what I mean?

In time, he may come around but I would also prepare yourself that he may not.

Good luck.

T.