I Promise This Is My Last Wedding Question...

I think it's pretty normal to feel that way. I hate being the center of attention. HATE.

So my approach at this point is........ avoidance. Good coping mechanism, eh?

I am just not thinking about it. As soon as I do, I get incredibly nervous. So I'm just not thinking about it. I know that when the time comes, I'll do what I need to do, so fretting and worrying about it now doesn't help me at all. So I'm just not thinking about it.

Try it, it's working for me!

Yep--you'll be fine.
(I declined a bridal shower for the same reasons you listed though.)
It will be OK!
And it will go faster than you want. Enjoy!

Drink a nice cold glass of champagne right before and you should sail down that aisle with a smile on your face.

That's what I did. 8)

OMG I was the same way as you except I had to do it in front of 150 ppl. I am so so so shy and I was beyond nervous to have all eyes on me. I also didnt have anyone "give me away" so I walked down the aisle 75% of the way myself and then my husband met me the rest of the way and walked to the alter together. So for that 75% of the way I was all alone and of course when the music started up and everyone stood up to turn and watch me I stubbed my toe on a concrete block on the ground and tripped. I didnt fall but still. I was told by so many ppl that I just ran down the aisle. But I look back now and think what a goofball I was. Like you said, these are ppl that you have known forever and they are all there to share in your special day. You only get one shot at it and you will spend hours getting all sexy for this day so try to relax and enjoy it and rock it out. Oh and have yourself a stiff drink before you walk down the aisle - I wish I had thought about that one, it might have helped me
Good Luck and Congrats

That's normal. Just your eyes on the prize! Meaning, when you begin the walk, just keep your eyes forward on your guy, and you won't notice everyone else.

Calm down, the man of your dreams will be right beside you the whole time, just think everyone is looking at him, not you. He will not let anything happen to you, he loves you so much. You don't have to worry about anything.
Relax, take deep breaths, he'll be right next to you!

You will be fine. I thought the same as you. I HATE being infront of ppl. But when we were up there... we were so concentrated on each other that neither one of us noticed the other ppl there. It was as if it were just me, him and the minister. It's normal to feel this way but once you start to say your vows no one else matters but you and your new hubby.
Don't feel sorry for asking all the wedding questions. Atleast you have us to ask. I didn't even know this site existed until I had kids. So ask all the questions that you want!!!

Honey, you will be just fine :) It's so normal to suddenly start to freak out about something you've been stressing over and planning for so long. But you know in your heart that you want to marry this man, and that it is important to him for family and friends to share in the occasion. Sure, it would be easier to just elope or go to the courthouse... but this is the only time in your life that you will have this opportunity (hopefully) and I think you would eventually regret not going through with the ceremony and party.

Yes, all eyes will be on you, but they are only staring because you are wearing a gorgeous gown and glowing with happiness! The only person you need to concern yourself with is the man that is about to become your husband. The rest is just background.

That is normal, I was a Radio-TV-Film and Theater major in college. I had to audition for plays, talk about wanting to faint :-)!! I also became a Black Belt in Tae Kwon Do a few years back and had to compete in tournaments and testings to get there. One tournament I competed in I was the only female Black Belt in my age group, so I had to perform my form alone in front of my Grand Master, the other judges, my students and the audience. I was litterly shaking in my boots. ( I shouldn't have been a nervous wreak I knew I was getting 1st place!!)
I have found that taking a big deap breath and exhaling slowly helps A LOT. It slows down your heart rate and gives you a moment to think.
I now officiate at weddings, I always reassure the bride and groom I will get you there. When I say the vows I only say a phrase or sentence at a time something like I, R., take you___ for my husband (pause) To love you (pause) ect. your officiant knows you are nervous. I will repeat the vow if the bride or groom get confused.
I also recommend to everyone at the rehearsal to do the rehearsal with extra slowness going down the aisle because when we get nervous we tend to speed up and you want your pictures to look good --not a blur in white going down the aisle.
PM me if you need anything. You will be fine ~~ I promise.
Congrats and enjoy!! :-)

Why have you never felt deserving? When you figure out the answer to this question-you may be able to work through the problem. You need only, the two of you, get married in front of the justice of the peace-then you can have dinner with 50 friends and family if it really bothers you that much.

Ask your doctor for a Xanax script. Seriously. It helped me :)
(Of course you'd have to avoid alcohol if you do)
I think it's better than alcohol because it relaxes ou w/o making you all goofy.

Im about to get married too, and feel the same way. We're having a private, small ceremony with our daughters and 2 witnesses. My first wedding, I had 30 or so guests & when I confided in my father, he so kindly called out to my guests that i was feeling really shy, "so please cover your ears & close your eyes everyone"... I just about died, guzzled some wine & was pretty tipsy for the ceremony. LOL you'll do fine! Good luck!

A little stage fright is normal.
Don't worry about it.
Enjoy your special day!
It use to be a womans name appeared in the news paper 3 times in her life - when she was born, when she got married, and when she died.
Getting married is one of the big rites of passage and you SHOULD be in the spot light.
Smile till your face hurts then smile some more!
Glory in it!

Tell yourself that you don't want to cheat yourself out of this very special day because you are nervous. Make a point of telling yourself over and over that you want to remember ever last detail and as you are trying to remember everthing, you will be so busy and happy that the day will just fly by and be done. Don't wish it away. ENJOY THIS DAY! YOU WILL MAKE IT!

the best part of the day was having all the people in the world that care about me all in once place, truly wishing me well.... all the stuff i sweated about for months and planned and picked and stressed over, none of it mattered, i didnt notice half of it.... i cant speak in front of anyone except children, and i was so nervous, and the first thing i remember is walking out seeing my friends from college next to my family, my nana sitting in front of new friends and old friends, everyone, all smiling at me, it was really a great feeling. i had a great time. feel the love , enjoy it :) it goes by so fast....

:) Well, weddings are super stressful, so I don't think it should irk anyone. I would say that it's your and your fiance's wedding. You can plan it however you want. I think you should respect his wishes to be surrounded by friends and family; however, you can make it more casual so as to make you more comfortable. The traditional wedding is designed because lots of brides LIKE being the center of attention. You can make it different. I was super uncomfortable doing a wedding dance for example and we didn't have enough $$ for a big reception anyway...so we just didn't do it -- but we still had a fun day. It might be hard to get out of the walk up the aisle, but maybe the people you choose to escort you can make you more comfortable. Or maybe the music you choose for that walk can be more fun and less formal. This is your day -- what do you like doing with your friends and family? Make it that way. Everyone around you and your wedding knows you and loves you for who you are -- why shouldn't your wedding be a reflection of you? Between you and me, the key to the wedding is for you and your fiance to decide on what you want. He's only going to have a couple of requests if he's a normal guy and you will have all kinds of things. YOU decide and stick to your guns without getting into a fight. Just a polite, "no, we decided it should be like this". Everyone else will have an opinion and put lots of pressure on you, but ultimately, it's your day and your memories.

Take a couple of deep breaths right now. AND before you walk down the old aisle. It's okay to be a little nervous. They'll just think it's wedding jitters, lol. But really, when the time comes, it's a little like child birth. You are worried NOW about things that won't bother you at the time.... You'll be so focused on your fiance and the vows you are making to each other and how relieved you are that this day is finally HERE and it is happening, that you probably won't give much thought to anybody else who happens to be present... outside of you and hubby, the minister and your kids.... The rest are just background noise. :)

Your too cute :-) YOU WILL MAKE IT JUST FINE!!!! I'm the opposite - I Adored being the center of attention at my wedding :-) its Your Day !!!!!!!
If you did have a good stiff vodka tonic before you walked down would that help?? OR would it make you more "goofy" haha
I had a Ridiculously Strong Bloody Mary !! LMAO but thats just cause I Love them !
and ALL the attentions not on Just you.... there will be a Groom there ;-)
Its going to be Wonderful and you will have Fantastic day ~ veil or no veil~
and you will Just be fabulous YOU !!!!!!!

This particular realization hit me in the foyer of the church just before the door opened for me to walk down the isle. Kind of late for me.

I shook through the whole ceremony, my hubby to be leaned forward and told the bishop to make it short, I was having an anxiety attack. The Bishop put the cards down that he was using to help him. We got right to the vows and got finished quickly.

If you have the ability to do some relaxation/meditation use some visualization and imagine you are in the front during the ceremony. Imagine how peaceful it will be, standing next to him. If you do this regularily it will help.