I Need Advice on Weaning

I night weaned many months before my son stopped nursing completely. Since he was over a year, I did not feel I should have to continue "on demand" nursing. My son still nursed every am, afternoon and bedtime for about 6-7 months after I stopped nursing him at night. Is your daughter actually drinking at night? My son was not. He would latch on and pass out. So for about a week when he woke at night, I comforted him in other ways but just stopped offering the breast. He was mad at first but got over it. It is worth a shot. If you don't want to wean completely, you should not have to. Good luck.

I think that you can night wean before you completely stop and maybe just nurse right before bed. Both by boys did the same thing and generally once we stopped nursing at night they slept longer. When I started to wean, I initially offered them regular milk when they woke up at night and then switched to water after awhile. I don't think they are looking for a drink at night with nursing, just comfort but I think they got the point when I gave them milk. You know your child and you best so you have to decide when it is the right time. Once I was ready and I felt my boys were ready, it really wasn't that hard to wean.

Try not to nurse her at bedtime. Often times, they fall asleep nursing, then wake up because they don't have that comfort factor, or can't remember how they got into their bed and it startles them. Once she learns to self soothe, it will be better. I nursed until my kids were maybe 18 months and stopping the night nursing helped with their bedtimes.

Also, she is certainly old enough to cry herself back to sleep. When she wakes, you can go in there and gently rub her back or head to help sooth her, put don't pick her up, talk to her, sing, nurse her... those all are distractions on helping her learn to fall back asleep on her own.

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First that may not be the case my eldest now 15 still has trouble with sleeping for more then 4 or 5 hours at a crack. All my kids nursed until 2ish and slept pretty good except number 1.
If you are ready to wean then go slowly by eliminating a nursing for 3 to 5 days then eliminate the next for 3 to 5 days and so forth you will have to replace the daytime nursing with some nutritional foods or beverages at the very least let her have a sippy of water to go to all day. It won't be easy if she is really attached to the nursing times. Good Luck!

First of all, are you ready to wean? Or are you just trying to wean in order to get her to sleep better?

If you are ready to wean, I suggest dropping 1 feeding per day for a week at a time. Are you feeding her at night when she wakes up? If so, I'd suggest dropping one of those first. If you aren't, then I suggest dropping a middle of the day feeding. Do that for one week, then drop another, etc. This will help with your milk supply and you will not have engorgement problems.

If you aren't ready to wean but do not want her to nurse at night, I suggest when she wakes up to try and get her back to sleep first. If that doesn't work, offer her a sippie with a little bit of water.

You said it breaks your heart to wean which makes me think you are not ready. If you really want to keep weaning all the time, you will have to sacrifice sleep or maybe have her cosleep with you while she's eating then put her back into her bed.

If you want to keep nursing and it brings you both so much joy there is no reason to stop and you're doing a great thing for your little girl! You can night wean without weaning completely. When my oldest was about the same age we night weaned and got him sleeping through the night by sending in daddy every time he fussed and cried. My husband would comfort him and put him back to sleep. It took a few nights of that but he eventually stopped expecting to nurse every time he woke in the night. We continued our nursing relationship during the day for quite some time after that. Good luck.

I haven't checked to see what other people have said, so this advice may be a repeat. Have you considered partially weaning her? As you begin the weaning process, keep either the early morning, or last feeding before bed as breastfeeding time. That way you will still have that closeness, but at the same time, have more freedom!
Best of luck to you!

I would also recommend just night weaning - there is no need to stop day nursing if that is still going well. I night weaned my two youngest when they were 16-18 months old and still continued to breastfeed during the day (well I work FT so technically, I was nursing morning, evening (cluster feeds) and weekends until they were at least 2.

Good luck!

I know exactly what you mean -- I nursed both of my older children until 36 and 39 months, and my 22 mo is still nursing. You don't have to completely wean if you don't want to in order to get sleep. Consider night weaning -- here's an article on how to do it: http://drjaygordon.com/attachment/sleeppattern.html I night weaned all three of my children at 18 months, and the first two started sleeping through the night within a few weeks, and the youngest, although he is not sleeping completely through, usually sleeps from around 8:30 pm until around 5 am, nurses, and then goes back to sleep for another hour or 2 instead of being up to nurse every 2-3 hours. Night weaning gives you a rough week or two, but then it makes life much easier, and lets you keep nursing until you're ready to give it up. Good luck!

C. - I can't imagine why your daughter would sleep better if you weaned. 14 months was the age that my 2nd child was transferred to his own bed and we night weaned. I didn't know that I could night wean with my first and so I felt sleep deprived for a long time. But #2 was easy. We were night weaned without tears in 3 nights. Occasionally at wake ups his dad would have to be the one to go in, but I welcomed the break! ;-)
I wouldn't give up breastfeeding if this is the only reason why. Enjoy it and you and your child can continue to reap the many benefits that come with extended breastfeeding.

Also, i took Valerian root at night - which is a natural relaxer. It's not potent like a tylenol pm - it's used for stress homeopathically during the waking hours. It saved me! It just took off the edge of sleeplessness, so that as soon as I was done nursing I would fall right back into sleep - yet light enough that you will still hear every sniffle and sigh from the baby.
You can buy it anywhere. I think the dose says 3 capsules, but I started with 2 and then went down to just 1 once it started working.

Good luck.
You're doing a good job, so just follow your heart. This is all just in the moment.

Have you checked out the book "The Vital Touch" by Sharon Heller? If not, please do. Your local library should have it or you can grab it via Amazon.com

Also, check out sites like Mothering.com and AttachmentParenting.com

All great sites that can help you with your weaning decision.

My two cents is: don't wean until you both feel it's right...if you enjoy it,...keep doing it. Your child is only this age once.

Happy Holidays!

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