Hi Everyone,
I am having a baby is 41 days! My house is far from ready! Its pretty much a diaster right now. I have SOOO much to do! We even have to BUILD the baby a room and havent even started yet! We are converting our bonus room into an actual bedroom for the baby. I feel like I should already have this stuff done and its driving me crazy. But, Im tired, today I feel like Im going to throw up, and my crotch hurts so bad. Will I get over this? It seems like with the other two I was nesting by now and had everything together. Help!
We literally had to put together a room when I found out I was 5.5 months pregnant. Really, does the baby really care? As long as you have the basics you're good but I'd enlist some help ASAP.
Dont feel bad. You shouldn't be doing construction! Now is the time to swallow your pride and ask for help. There are people in your life that are just waiting for you to ask.
Throw a building party with beer and pizza. Get all the dads, uncles, brothers, and handy men you know over to build that room and do the hard stuff.
Then throw a nesting party and get all the mommas, aunties, grammas, and neighbors over to help you do the soft stuff.
Don't be afraid to ask for help.
I know how you feel. Go easy on yourself. A baby doesn't need much.
I had a friend who was sick, and they had a "moving party" - everyone came and did the work. If you have enough friends, choose one special one and tell her how overwhelmed you are. Get her to organize a team of people to come do this as your new baby gift or instead of a shower. There is also a free website called Lotsa Helping Hands where tasks can be listed and people can sign up for a day/time/task they can schedule. The main thing is, once you do this, you have to LET people help you! Do not clean and cook for them to come over and clean and cook!
With the other 2, you might have had more done. But you didn't have 2 kids already, and you weren't so tired. And it's harder to keep things together when you have 2 kids messing it up. And every pregnancy is different. You aren't feeling well. Be nice to yourself. Ask for, and accept, help. And scale back your expectations of what has to be done for a new baby. You know from experience what they really need and what would just be lovely for a photograph or scrapbook!
Get hubby MOVING!! Tell him that room is not going to build itself. Ask him to invite a few buddies or brothers over to help get the room ready this weekend. You and the other ladies can make them lunch and dinner. Or go shopping and order in. Don't let it make you nutty. Just make a list of what needs to be done and tell hubby to get going.
Don't be so hard on yourself! If you are feeling that rotten, rest is what you need, not the stress and physical exertion of building and decorating a bedroom for the baby. As much as we sometimes like to think we are superwomen, we do have our limitations. You have two other children and are that close to having your third, cut yourself some slack! Although you may be disappointed not to have things where you want them, it's not the end of the world if you have to make do with a little chaos at first. If you absolutely can't handle the thought of having the baby before the room is ready, do you have friends, family members, or a church group who would be willing/able to come to your aid? If so, now would be one of those times to call for some backup. In the meantime, do those little things you can do, and leave the rest for someone else or a time when you are feeling more energetic. Best of luck!
Look at your housework that has to be done. Now realize, your house is going to look 10x worse than that in 41 days ;) No one has EVER judged a very pregnant lady or new mom for an untidy house!! I've got 3 kids (and a fiance), what do you think MY house looks like right now? I won't tell on you for your mess if you don't tell on me for mine ;) Before people come over, I always throw out my little disclaimer 'please excuse my mess, my money tree hasn't sprouted yet and the cleaning lady won't accept my children as payment'.
Um...You're having a baby soon 'nough said! Congrats and good luck. Get a housekeeper for a one or two time deep cleaning and take it easy. You know you'll be busy after day 41 :)
you've been thru this before...you know it will all work out in the end.
You've also posted a lot of questions recently.....& while we are here to support you.....it might be time to just walk away from the computer & really focus on what needs to be done!
I actually have several friends who gave up Facebook for Lent! & I do know that I periodically ban myself from the computer....simply so that I can accomplish what I feel needs to be done......or because I'm really tied up with my 14yo's extra-curricular activities. Walking away from technology really does help sometimes! I wish you a safe & speedy delivery!
Babies can room in with you or be in the living room. They are small and don't need much. Relax :)
