I Am Looking for Help with Sleeping!

I have been through this exactly. My daugther is 3, and she will go down well for couple weeks, then test me for one, then do good for another couple weeks. The rules taht i have are: you get everything befroe i leave the room. if she gets out of bed, i put her guard rail up and it may take an hour but she will fall asleep. just dont give in, they will still love you in the morning. Lately i have the rule that if she is good and quiet, i will come in every few minutes to give her another kiss. That works well, that rewards her for being quiet. Tell her that you are going to sleep now too and have to go. In the am, she used to like to climb in bed with me, but then it kept getting earlier and earlier. THen i would get up and go into the living room with her and put on the tv and i would sleep longer. it was hard, but it would keep her out of my bed. It killed me because i wanted her there too, but it is best that she doesn't. She was good with naptimes until about 3 years old, at daycare they have to lie down, so at home i make her too but it is a struggle. But mine will give up when i am adimant (sp?). I hope this helps.

S.

My twins are almost 2 and a half and they like to do the whole crying thing. I have a bedtime ritual with them that made bedtime easier. I like a candle that lets off a soothing smell and I say a little prayer. Then I let them pretend to blow it out, then I pretend, then put it out with a snuffer and we say yay and I kiss them and tuck them in and head out. After the first week of this, they stopped the crying and went to bed.

They also get up alot earlier, even tho they still go to bed at 8. They come in my room, so I keep a vcr in my room and let them watch blues clues on video or rugrats on video (we don't have cable). They usually curl up with me and either sit quietly or fall back asleep. It may be a bad habit to get them into, but I honestly cherish the morning time we spend with each other laying in the bed.

Since in your e-mail you didn't mention any other changes (diet or emotional), what comes to mind for me is maybe she is overtired. She is technically getting up at the same time, but going to bed an hour later. I know when my children are overtired they tend to have a hard time going to sleep.

Not sure what your bed time routine is, if you don't already, try to give her a warm bath before bed. They have soothing bubblebaths and lotions with chamomile to help children to get to rest. You could also try putting her to bed an hour "earlier" (really the same time she used to go to bed) so she can catch up and then slowly extending the time out.

Also if she senses this is something you don't want to do, it could become more of a power struggle. If you talk to her about it before and she knows what to expect, it should make it easier for her. So maybe tell her, you love to spend time with her but you also need to do xyz (most likely clean-up if its anything like my house!) so maybe she can pick a favorite book for you to read to her before going to bed and then you can spend 5 minutes with her helping her to go to sleep but then you need to go do xyz.

In the mean time, enjoy it! Bedtime is so special as they are so peaceful and squishy (as my kids call it) and she's only little once!

Many blessings for you and your family!
A.

I've had some issues with my DD standing and crying, too. (She's younger - 12 mos. and it started when she started standing) I've figured out that she knows that she has her daddy and I wrapped around her tiny little finger. LOL When we stopped giving in to her screaming and wanting to be picked up/rocked/having her back rubbed continuous times, she started going to sleep on her own. Don't get me wrong, it wasn't an instant change. You have to be strong, but in a week she went from screaming and crying for 30 minutes to fussing a few minutes and blissful SLEEP! (And through the night, YAY!)
I agree with the "squishy" comment below, but also believe that it is our job to help them fall asleep on their own.
Of course, knowing that she's not sick or any other problem is important. Peek in without her knowing to make sure.
Good luck.

Yeah, I went through actually I still am going through the same thing with my two year old daughter. She sleeps in her own bed for about 3 to 4 hours and then its climbing into our bed for the remainder of the night. On top of that she wakes up at 530am on the nose.

The doctor told us about 6 months ago that as long as we didnt give her anything to drink to put her to sleep once she awakened it would be okay and she wouldnt have that urge to wake up again. So we did that and it still hasnt stopped.

My 4 year old did the same thing until we bought ourselves a new mattress set and gave him ours now he sleeps like baby from 8pm-8-10am. Its a security thing.

My advice is to cherish the time you have to rub her back to get her to sleep. I think our culture puts too much emphasis on getting babies to sleep alone. She will be independent far too soon and you will no longer have a sweet baby who want you to help her sleep. So, I would do what it takes to help her fall asleep even if it takes time out of your schedule. It will make her feel more secure and you will get to cuddle your sweet baby.