I Am Going cRAZY!!!!!! Terrible TWOS!!

It is important to come up with a clear discipline plan. My 4 year old was like that. Time out worked for him, although it was very difficult at first. It is also important for children like that to have a clear schedule. Also it help my son to have 30 min every day where I sat a played just with him.

Hi E.,

I'm so sorry that your toddler is making life so frustrating. I'm not sure if you already belong to a playgroup in your area but it may help him to interact with others and not be so focused on you. Also, even though he is young you could consider sending him to a pre-k one or two mornings per week. This may give you the time away from him needed to not feel so overwhelmed by him and to be able to respond without getting angry. How does he respond to time-outs? Some children are receptive to this form of discipline while others aremore affected when things get taken away for a brief time. Ofcourse when all else fails remember to breathe deeply and pray, pray, pray. I actually pray with my 3yr old and sometimes include that he ask God to help him be a better listener when mommy tells him something. Good Luck and God Bless.

Hello
I have a son who is 18 months and I currently watch a 21 month old child. I like to use positive discipline. It's a book and the happiest toddler on the block. They seem to work well. My son just entered the hitting and bitting world so I know how you feel.

Deep Breath!

Sometimes, when you are feeling totally overwhelmed, you need to walk away. Put him in a room he is safe in for a few minutes, and leave him alone (even if you ar eonly on the other side of the door). If he comes to you, ignore him if you have to. Sometimes your reaction to his behavior is what his goal is. If you give him the silent treatment, you can take away the reinforcement and reduce the behavior.

All behavior is a form of communication. Figure out what he is trying to say (easier said than done) and you can change to behavior!

I just finished a great book Screamfree Parenting. Our Five year old can be very challenging. It seemed like until this year I had all the patience in the world but then she learned new ways to get my angry. Through reading the book I learned I can't make her react the way I want but I can control the way I react in turn making her learn a new style and three weeks into it our household has changed completely so much that my husband who doesn't care for reading has read the book as well :)

Are you looking for childcare at this time?

I had a son who was just like this. He continued to pull my chain throughout his childhood. I agree with the other advice about discipline and giving yourself a break that you've gotten.

Each child has a different personality that they're born with. There is always a good aspect of that personality - or it can be channelled in a good way. My son was very curious and wanted to learn through exploration, so I did everything I could to give him safe opportunities to do that. I taught him to learn to like books, which can be calming by using cardboard or plastic ones about trucks and things he enjoyed. I challenged him with games. I put him in a playroom with child-safe gates when I needed a break and he was young enough so I didn't see his behavior as "bad". Giving him "time out" didn't work until he was 3.

I know you have limited time and I can't relate to your working with young kids since I was a family child care provider (making my income at home taking care of other people's kids). But child care providers are educated in this field and since you pay for it, use them for this kind of information.

BTW, today my son is a government contractor doing amazing things.

- J.
Mother, grandmother, substitute teacher, religious educator
http://www.joycedowling.com/