Husband's Job Stolen!

In my line of work, we are required to report compliance issues. Just remember, you are only getting one side of the story. It must have been a serious compliance issue for him to have been demoted. Just be glad he wasn't fired.

Sorry this happened.
Sounds like wee bit more than a "clerical" error (usually committed by clerks).
Might be a case of where there's smoke, there's fire.
Why in the world would you unload on his wife?
Imagine the perspective from the other side--to her, he's a hero.

I'm not sure I understand why you feel Joe did something so awful. He found your husband's error and brought it to the boss' attention. And if the "clerical error" was truly a "small aspect", your husband would probably have gotten off with a warning instead of a demotion. JOE didn't cost you thousands of dollars, your own husband did. He's the one who made the mistake. How nice your husband is is irrelevant to the situation, I'm sure your husband is a very nice guy and a very hard worker (there's a good chance Joe is ALSO a very nice guy and a very hard worker). But since your husband made the error, he should deal with the consequences. At least he wasn't outright fired.

And, no, you shouldn't contact the wife.

You may want to call it a clerical error but it doesn't sound like a clerical error. Inputting data incorrectly is a clerical error, not filing properly with the state is a compliance error.

The way I see it if your husband knew or was told about his error and hoped no one noticed he got what was coming to him. If this guy went over his head without first bringing it to your husband first he is a snake in the grass.

Regardless this has nothing to do with you or the other guy's wife so I would stay out of it. If this guy really is aggressive all he has to do is bring what you sent to his wife to his boss and your husband will probably lose his job completely.

What you are going through sucks but your husband did make a mistake.

Stay out of it or you will make it worse for your husband. Your husband made a mistake and is paying the price. How are you qualified to determine if it was a "small aspect?" Ususually federal or state paperwork isn't a small issue and CAN cost companies large amounts of money in fines. Be thankful he still has a job.

He may have gone over your husbands head to get him in trouble, but chances are he did it because he honestly believe the company could get in trouble, there for threatening everyones jobs. It sounds like your husband mess up, and although the punishment seems harsh, his boss had to do what she felt was best for the company, but you can not hold "Joe" responsible for an error your husband made and the consequences of that error. Sorry, I know how frustrating this must be, and right before the holidays too.

I would not write his wife, it will only make you look petty. If there is something to be handled it is up to the men to do so in the work place with their boss.

I wouldn't contact anyone. You are the WIFE, not the boss, not the company owner, not the human resources manager... just the wife of a coworker. You don't have any business contacting anyone at the company, let alone the spouse of your husband's coworker.

It sounds to me as if your husband's coworker simply notified their boss of the filing error, which does sound serious (filing with the state is serious, trust me on this). Since they worked the same position, that's not going over anyone's head. If your husband were his boss and the guy went to your husband's boss, then THAT would count as going over his head. As it stands, it sounds like a mistake that needed to be brought to the attention of the boss and the BOSS decided it was serious enough to take action.

You're putting the blame in the wrong place. I'm sorry. It's not the coworker's fault, and it's not the boss's fault. It's the fault of whomever didn't file the paperwork properly.

I can tell you as an administrative assistant and employment specialist (and former manager and supervisor) that filing paperwork is extremely important when there are compliance issues at stake. It really can mean losing a contract, failing an audit, losing benefits for consumers/clients, and many more serious results. Don't assume it was just some small, insignificant piece of paperwork. Your husband may be a very hard worker, but even the best worker can make serious mistakes that need to be held accountable.

EDIT: And for the record, it does sound to me like "Joe" is actually a responsible guy and NOT a snake. He is not responsible for your husband's demotion and he did NOT steal your husband's job. The fact that this happened right before Christmas is bad timing, but a moot point. Blame your husband for apparently bad judgment, nice guy or not. I understand that you want to support your husband and you should... but misplacing your anger at "Joe" and even at the boss is wrong.

Well that does suck, doesn't it?

But your husband's job wasn't stolen. Your husband screwed up and was demoted for that screw up. You should be happy that he still has a job.

Joe didn't "do" anything to you or your husband. Your husband didn't do an important part of his job. He screwed up. Joe reported the screw up. I wonder why? Perhaps your husband knew about the screw up and didn't want to own up to it himself, and Joe was afraid EVERYONE would go down in flames if SOMEONE didn't say anything?

I think that's a pretty brave act, personally, to speak up when nobody else will.

As for writing Joe's wife? No. That sounds like a good way to end up with a harrassment charge, and a sure fire way for your husband to lose the job he still has.

Restructure your budget and move on. And quit blaming Joe for your husband's "clerical error" (aka screw up).

I understand your anger, frustration and fear, but do not write his wife. It's very unfortunate, but it sounds like your husband made a clerical error. This man did not forget the state paperwork, your husband did. My husband works on projects with our state, so I know for a fact that some of the paperwork IS that critical. This man just pointed it out to the boss. If she knows her industry then "Joe" couldn't "scare" her. He's either correct or completely wrong about the repercussions. It's also possible that he didn't point it out, but was merely asked about it. It is stressful that he was demoted, but I would be very grateful that your husband was not fired from his job.

I agree with the other moms at this point.

1) the wife did nothing wrong.
2) your husband, no matter how small the mistake did make one. What could have happened to the company had this mistake not been reported? Would there even be a job left?
3)If someone reported me for missing something, yea it would suck, but guess what its my darn fault for not taking the time to realize what I should have been doing.
4)I think this is my final point (cross your fingers if you like). While a demotion sucks, and it may not be financially right for you, maybe this is an oppertunity to get a better position. Maybe if he falls in another department of the company he can grow stronger on that point. I know people that work the same job I do, and have grown from the bottom and are making double what I do. May not seem fair at the time but if he is a good hard worker as you say, he will earn it back in one way or another.

point 5 and my last. Do you know the whole thing? I tell my SO partials sometimes when I know that I messed up and dont want to hear the lecture outside my own head.

I used to work for the state of Ohio many many moons ago. I've also worked for the red cross. And let me tell you ... there is NO aspect of the paperwork that has to be filed that is "small". If your husband "overlooked" any part of paperwork that had to be filed with the state and didn't file it ... that ISN'T a "clerical error" ... that's a big problem. As others have said ... your husbands demotion isn't Joe's fault. The blame for his demotion lays squarely on his own shoulders. It sucks but that's life.

And really contacting Joe's wife? Just what do you hope to accomplish by doing such? And chances are she already knows what went down at work and has heard the OTHER side of the story.

L., do not write his wife. That will only make you look a little crazy (no offense). I know you are angry right now, but let your husband handle this. He made a mistake at work and he must deal with the fallout from that. I know you feel wronged, but this has nothing to do with you. Maybe your husband can work hard and prove himself and climb back up the ladder. Sorry this happened to you.

Writing Joe's wife can backfire BIG TIME as in your DH getting fired. Joe and his family may accuse you of harassment... and there is absolutely NO WAY that contacting him or his wife over this would achieve ANYTHING but escalate the situation.

The truth of the matter is while Joe may be a backstabbing snake - it was your husband who made the error. He made be the sweetest guy and hardest worker, but he screwed up on an important piece of paperwork. And let's be honest here: if it hadn't been a pretty big mistake "Joe" would have had NOTHING to go on. They would not have demoted you DH over a little typo or some insignificant clerical error.

Yes, Joe is a douche, but your husband did a lousy job by messing up on an important thing. That sucks, but I think he needs to face that this would not have happened if he didn't mess up.
Sorry.

If you write to his wife, she and he may interpret it as some kind of threat and this situation could then go beyond the workplace and into the realm of a police visit. Don't. Do. It.

What appears to be "he stole this job" from one perspective is "he blew the whistle and saved the company and everyone's jobs" from another perspective. Joe may indeed be a total snake, or have inside information on the boss, or whatever, but the deed is done now.

Your husband should work very hard at what he's now doing; and at the same time, brush up his resume; figure out (with the help of a job counselor) how to explain the demotion if asked about it; line up references from past jobs who will not mention this situation; and start to job-hunt quietly while staying in his current job. I really do recommend that you put some money toward consultations with a good, experienced career counselor who can help your husband handle how this is going to appear in his job history.

You are of course defending your husband and are right to do so, but make your defense an offense -- go out and help him do the above to get a new job. And don't write to anyone about anything or you will be branded as "that woman who went ballistic on paper." He will pay the price professionally if you write any letters defending him; word will get around in his office or in other similar businesses in his field. Take a deep breath and don't do it.

I'm sorry your family is suffering but your husband's job was not STOLEN. Your husband did not perform his job. Not filing paperwork with the state is NOT a small aspect of the job. Especially by what happened I would say its rather large and important.

Why didn't your husband report this to his boss before the "snake" did? This makes it look like your husband was trying to hide the fact that he made a mistake. The boss wasn't "scared", she was aware of the implications of the situation and took action.

Nice guys finish last here, no, the guy who didn't perform his job is the one who gets in trouble and that was your husband.

I really think you need to take a deep breath and calm down. Don't write a letter to the snake's wife. Don't make it worse on your husband.

In the end, I think you both need to realize that he could have been fired and should be thankful that he wasn't.

I am so sorry to hear this :-(
I am wondering though if there isn't more to the story than what your husband is telling you, for example, why didn't HE go to the boss to let her know about the mistake, was he hoping he wouldn't get caught? Also, you say his BOSS was scared into *ETA, demoting* him by another employee? Did he threaten her with physical violence or something? If yes, I would think she would be firing HIM and filing harassment charges.
I really am sorry, but like I said I do feel there's more to this story.
And no, don't write the guy's wife, what good could come from that?

What the hell does his wife have to do with this. The boss is the one who demoted him, and your husband is the one who didn't make sure the paperwork was done. Place the blame, with the people who really had the power here. Has your husband approached the boss about this? The boss is the ONLY person who he should (HE should, not you) take this up with. The boss is the one who can make these decisions.

Don't be bitter and filled with vitriol towards the wife. The wife didn't make the decisions here. In the future your husband NEEDS to make sure he takes care of his job. One of the ways one takes care of a job, is paperwork. That part is HIS fault. I'm sure he is a wonderful man, and worker. BUT, he didn't do part of his job. This all starts with this. Very important, and crappy lesson learned. You can't control others, you can only control yourself. I sure hope he gets with the boss and straightens this out...especially right before Christmas. Good luck.

You stay out of it and be there for your husband personally to help him through this.

I understand your frustration and anger but don't direct that anger toward someone else who is just like you.... a wife supporting her husband. ANY contact by you could be perceived as a threat and then you are both going to be in a bad place.

What appears to be a "clerical" error could indeed be a HUGE error which falls with compliance.

Example.... with our company, we are required to provide MSDS sheets which let the manufacturers know EXACTLY what formulations we have used in making the raw materials for them to use. Let's say we "forgot" to do this with a product we sold and the manufacturer goes ahead and produces the product for a retailer from whom YOU ultimately make the purchase. If some sort of issue occurs with the product once it hits retailers and it is traced back that we did not provide the MSDS sheet which seems simply clerical and no big deal and the manufacturer failed to get the paperwork because "it's just a clerical thing" but they go ahead and use the product in their application, then we as well as the manufacturer would be held liable, fined heavily and most likely go out of business for failing to be in compliance with the state and government laws.

It is CRITICAL, as simple as it may seem, that we provide specific data for manufacturers regarding the application of our products.

My point, what seemed to be so little and "clerical" could be a HUGE issue. Your husband is lucky he still has a job if it was something along these lines.

Also, the IRS does not take ignorance of the law as an excuse if his clerical error had something to do along those lines.

I wish you the best. Help your husband pick up the pieces and move on. Don't make things worse by butting in yourself.

No matter what else happens or doesn't happen, I would NOT write a letter to his wife. No no no.

No no, you do nothing. I hear everything that goes on at my husband's work. EVERYTHING. I know the sh*t that goes on and of course when it affects my husband, I get angry, just like you. And yes, some of it affects my husband's pay at various times, and 99% of the time it is through no fault of his own but it's a small company and the owner can do whatever he wants. Sometimes those *little* mistakes are costly and that certainly does suck. But it is what it is. Sorry for your situation, I can certainly understand how you feel.

If your Husband was really innocent in this, he can contest it or talk to his Boss, right?

Seems like he made a mistake.
Which had big repercussions.

Your Husband still has a job.
Most companies, would have fired him, perhaps.

Don't go to the wife...she has nothing to do with it. Let them all take care of this at work.

It is your husband's job we are talking about..HE needs to do the clean up work. It was his small clerical error that must have had HUGE ramifications.

Joe didn't do anything wrong...he reported something that could have become a potentially big problem then everyone's jobs could have suffered.

Your hubs may be a nice guy..and I am sure he is..but he made a mistake. Mistakes can often times cost lives...cost lots of money..cost jobs . I am sure your husband has learned from this..the hard way..and it won't happen again. If he is a great guy,hard worker and does a phenomenal job...hopefully promotions will come around again.

Sorry I think you are in the wrong here. And you are angry at the wrong person. Your hubby did not fulfill the responsibilities of his job. Not filing paperwork with the state is not a 'clerical error' it is being irresponsible and could have put his employer into a world of hurt.
Maybe if Joe were his friend, he would have said something like 'Hey, I will stay and extra hour and help you get this done.' before going over your hubby's head. But in this economy it becomes a dog eat dog world.

Joe did the right thing by telling the boss, what if he hasn't and the whole company got in trouble? Blame your husband he made the mistake. An no don't bother joes wife she didnt do anything wrong.

I wouldn't contact his wife. That cold get your husband fired and get you into trouble.

Your husband messed up, he got demoted. It happens. I'd have him look for another job. Or, have him talk to his boss and make a plan of action to regain trust over the next 6 months/year.

There are lots of snakes out there. Sounds like all he can do is move on.

Sorry for your Christmas woes!

If it were a "clerical error", the consequences of the mistake would not have been so huge. It sucks large, but honestly, you can't blame Joe for the mistake your husband made. I like the idea of your husband being proactive about getting back on track to where he was, unless he has somehow burned bridges. If it was an important mistake (even a small mistake can be hugely important - just add a "0" to the end of 100 and you get 1000, if you see what I mean), and he faces up to it and asks how to repair whatever damage, he may regain some of what he lost.

Yes, you need to stay out of it. Neither you or your husband know the whole story. It sounds like the "clerical error" was serious. Don't blame the guy who reported it. Your husband needs to accept responsibility for the error. If he didn't accept responsibility, i.e was defensive, with his boss that explains why he was demoted.

And what would you gain by upsetting his wife? She's not responsible for what her husband does. Misery loves company. You want her to be miserable too? Your husband doesn't get his job back and his boss has one more reason to not consider him for future promotions.

My question to you is...... Instead of being pissed at Joe, why are you not instead pissed at their boss.... Maybe you are giving way too much power to Joe , when really... It is not the bosses decision to demote someone?

I can relate to Joe in the sense that I was once accused of stealing someone else's job............. turns out, the person's whose desk I had to cover while she was on maternity leave, came back and only wanted to work part-time.. well her desk required a full time employee, so the manager allowed the woman to work only part-time while at the same time, kept me on "her" desk..... However, instead of the woman being happy that she was allowed to go from FT to PT, guess who took the brunt of..... ME....... all I heard was.....That girl stole my job........... she went behind my back......... which I NEVER did...........

truth.. It was our MANAGER's decision......... NOT mine..... the manager needed to do what he needed to do in order to effectively run our department.......

While Joe did go over peoples' head... how would he know what the outcome would be? maybe he was trying to save his own A@@ and other employees from what could have been an even worse situation.... you don't say how big a mistake this was... but it must have been big enough that they felt they had to demote your husband (whether wrong or right) Anyway.... I think you are giving way too much power to Joe.. and calling wife.. what's she have to do with it?

IF your husband was wrongly demoted, then I think he should fight it... if not, then perhaps his job is like my former whereby IF we made ANY type of financial payout error.. We got fired.. this, whether we previously did a good job or not.. It wasn't personal.. it was just that my department had specific policies in place for the customer's sake that they had to follow..

I truly believe if there was some wrongdoing here, then your husband has a good case... can he appeal the decision with HR and give them his side of the story?

L., good luck to you and your family.. things may end up working out... Try and stay positive..

Keeping a disgruntled employee around is a major threat to a business and it smacks of bad management. I'd guess your misfortune is not truly Joe's fault, but instead a result of a boss who handles things poorly. Encourage your husband to update his resume and begin looking for a new job. Be grateful that he still has employment while he looks.

I'm sorry you're going through this, but writing to Joe's wife won't accomplish anything. His wife will take his side, and you'll look crazy. If Joe is the jackass that you say he is, then his wife already knows, and either agrees with him or doesn't care, and if he's not, his wife knows that, too. If someone's wife wrote to me about something my husband did at work, I would file a harassment charge, personally. You're just going to make things worse.

I'm not as sure as many of the other posters that Joe is innocent, however. I don't know either way, but my husband works in corporate, and I'm often surprised what a difference the politics of various situations make, as well as bosses' personal opinions of their subordinates. I have seen more than one good worker get fired "because" of a tiny mistake, or rather, I have seen a tiny mistake enable bosses to fire subordinates they don't like.

Since I don't know what error your husband made or how important or minimal it was, I can't give specific advice. I would say that first your husband needs to confront his boss, and then go to HR, especially if he has some evidence that his situation was mishandled (either from past such situations, policies in place, etc.)

Then, your husband should go to past bosses and any powerful connections he may have as his allies and personal references. If your husband has a reputation for being honest and a hard worker, hopefully he has someone who will go to bat for him.

Finally, I think your husband should start quietly looking for another job. I don't know if Joe is truly a back-stabber or if you are just placing all the blame on him, but either way, your husband's job may be at risk. Even if it isn't, his chances of future promotions have been curtailed, and it is easier to find work while you still have a job.

I'm sorry.

It sounds like your husband overlooked something that was an important responsibility that he either should have done himself or should have delegated given his schedule. At minimum, his boss should have been made aware that he was at capacity with his workload and needed to prioritize his responsibilities so that she was aware that the paperwork would not be filed as required. I suspect you're crediting Joe with too much power...the boss is probably aware of the reprecussions for failing to report and took steps that she thought were necessary. This sucks for your husband and your family, but it could have been worse (he could've een fired). The harsh reality is that NONE of this really has to do with Joe other than taking the opportunity to ensure that an error was corrected, and potentially saving the company huge fines, possible negative publicity, and the boss' job. Business is business. The only thing Joe may have really done wrong here is if he caused your husband to make this error (doesn't sound like it) or didn't give your husband an opportunity to report it himself (also doesn't sound like it). Your husband may be a very dedicated, hard worker and the nicest guy in the world, but he did make an error. The severity of that error is not something you will know all details. In this story, there is your husband's side, Joe's side, the boss' side, and the truth...you're hearing only one side. Do not write to Joe's wife...that'd just be embarassing for your husband, could cost him his job, would make you look kind of nutso, makes your husband look like he can't fight his own battles and also discounts your husband's accountability for his error. The best way to handle this is for your husband (and be extension, YOU) to act professional, take the high road and perform to the best of his abilities...perhaps while also looking at other employement options.

Where was your husband inregards to this clerical error that your calling it?Was he hiding from it?Did he know or not know this paperwork was overlooked how did Joe know it was overlooked was he ever brought into the office for questioning before "Joe"going in?Can't blame his wife what good will that do other than showing your envious of them.Your family is suffering your husband has been demoted he could of been fired then you'll be worse off but no he has a pay cut so now you'll have to adjust to it as a family.If your husband did his job 100% plus over that he would still be having the higher pay promoted etc. but no since this is all you have to say about it i'm just going to assume that he didn't make sure everything went smoothly before clocking out for the day the day it happened when his paperwork was turned in.
What ideas are you looking for? REVENGE?

If your husband is really innocent in all this, and if this guy stepped out of line to throw him under the bus, eventually it will catch up with this guy. Maybe when he goes over his new bosses head to overblow a situation. Until then, other than your husband making a good argument for his job, there is little you can do but focus on how to move forward.

My husband's favorite saying: Fair is a four letter word that starts with F.

I appreciate that more and more as I get older.

Honestly, this sounds like more of a problem with the "boss" and management. Knowing just what you said, its a bit much for a "clerical error" to get demoted, lose pay and his title. I think your husband should go to HR. You are not in a place to contact Joe's wife, that would solve nothing and make you look like the crazy wife. I hope you find something that helps. Good luck.

True Joe should have told your hubby about the error first instead of going straight to the boss, and his telling may have been self-rewarding, but the short of it is that Joe didn't do anything really wrong, and perhaps saved his company a fine or the loss of a contract.

What happens when the missing paperwork is filed? Will hubby be promoted back to the original position?

You may not like what I have to say but...as others have said, you need to stay out of this. If anything, this is between HR and your husband, not you and his wife. He may want to ask why he was demoted, although Florida being a no-fault state, the HR manager has no responsibility to answer that question or give a reason for anything they do.

What I don't understand is, why didn't your husband fess up to the boss about the fact he overlooked filing something. We don't know what kind of filing this is, but if it's related to the IRS, you would know this is very serious. Frankly, your husband should have spoken up to the boss and admitted his error. He and his boss should have such a relationship. We are all humans. I have forgotten things but I have looked my boss in the eye as soon as I realized it and before things got serious, and my boss appreciated that I had enough confidence to admit to an oversight and independently did the research on how to fix the oversight and briefed him on it. This shows I care enough to realize it is MY mistake and it is MY job to find a way to fix it, not his. Had your husband done this, this would have made him look responsible and honest, rather than letting a co-worker point out the error while being secretive.

Did he eventually admit to the error or did he try to downplay the slip-up? If he downplayed it, that may be why they demoted him. It takes a bigger person to face the boss, admit the error, and find a way to fix it, rather than trying to keep it a secret while someone else confesses on their behalf.

There's a chance that Joe just mentioned it without any intention of taking your husband's job, maybe he thought by nipping it in the bud now, it would save your husband the trouble of them finding out later, when it is too late to fix the problem, and then THAT would actually cost him his job. We have no way of knowing if this was intentional or a "uh-oh, let's save everyone's job" type of thing or a "I better speak up so that Mr. L can fix the error and keep his job, rather than them finding out later when it is too late and him getting fired as a result".

Your husband still has his job, which is more than a lot of people can say nowadays, and yes, lots of people DO get fired around the holidays. You never know, if your husband does a stellar job and goes above and beyond at his company, they might promote him again, so help keep him motivated and focused.

Sorry this man did this. What steps has your husband taken to rectify it? I would think unless this company are complete losers, they would take into account your husband, his track record etc. I would let your husband deal with this and talk to the boss, the higher up boss and CEO. If its really the way you say--( I am not doubting you--just saying) then they would see your husband isn't wrong and shouldn't be demoted etc. and see that the man is a snake. Best wishes but really--don't send the lady a letter.