Husband Is Leaving Us

Hi A.,

I just wanted say that I read your post and let you know that you have been heard. I really don't have any experience with this or advice but I just wanted you to know that someone is listening. All I can say is what I always try to remember for myself in difficult times is to "trust" that everything is happening for a reason and that you will always have what you need to get through anything. There is nothing you have to "do" but it is in the not "doing" and trusting that things will work out. I don't mean sit on the couch and don't move I just mean you don't have to "know" right now what to "do", with "trust" you will find your way.

Best wishes,
J.

Put your trust in God and lean on Him! He is the only hope in good times and bad. I've been where you are at-it's no fun.

God Bless!

J.

I can't give you advice on this subject. I can only imagine how difficult this situation must be for you and your family. I just wanted you to know that I read your post. Make surround yourself with people you love and trust and try to get as much support as you can so that you can feel taken care of and loved.
Best of luck.

My heart breaks for you and your husbands timing sucks. Your story sounds very similar to mine. My ex thought there was something he was missing out on, total mid-life crisis. I wanted to work things out, especially for our two small kids sake but he was willing to walk away from his family for some unknown fantasy life. I lost respect for him that he couldn't give more for his kids, that broke my heart the most. We have two amazing, wonderful kids who don't deserve this broken home. He also told me at Christmas, so it was hell, I spent Christmas day excusing myself to the bathroom to cry, couldn't get past the fact that this was our last Christmas as a family and the kids had no clue what was coming. Anyway, surround yourself with supportive friends and family, cry when you need too and have faith that there is something better out there for you. This is a starter husband, immature and too into his own agenda and needs. It has been 5 years for me, I have a amicable relationship with my ex and appreciate his efforts with the kids, although I do the bulk of the work, care, discipline, homework etc. I still hold out hope there is something better down the road, I truly believe I am better off without this person but it's very difficult to not be part of a regular family. Being divorced is hard and isolating, holidays are the hardest. For those of your who have intact families, invite a divorced person to join your festivities, it would mean the world! My kids are my priority, I try my best to put my disappointment in my ex aside and get along so the kids have the least disruption as possible. We are flexible with schedules and courteous to each other. You need to grieve for the person you thought your husband was going to be! I think you need to move on, no matter how hard that sounds or will be in the beginning. It's hard to repair once you lose respect for someone. I wish you the best of a bad situation, I'll keep you in my prayers. You don't deserve this, no one does, but you can come out stronger on the other side. Hug your kids and remind them how much you love them!

As hard as it is right now, it will get better. My sister is in a similar situation, but after about 20 years of marriage her husband left her for another woman. It is better that you move on. He has lost your respect and trust and it's not fair for him to expect you to wait around in case he decides he wants to be with you. He made a commitment when he married you, and he is not honoring that commitment. I was in a relationship for 10 years until he decided he didn't want to be with me, it was hard at first, but focus on your kids and yourself and things will get better. Eventually you'll find someone that really wants to be with you and things will be so much better.