How Would You React If You Found Out Your Husband...

Well, his wife was right to divorce him, and I hope she gets a lot of money from him. I would NOT answer his calls or see him ever again. Sneaky and gross is what he is.

Ah F.,
Ain't dating fun. Bwahaha
I like that he continued to call you *after* you told him he had integrity issues.
What a cad!

He had a kid with his ex while he was married? I don't think I could be friends with someone who had such little regard for his family.

Is this the same guy that you posted about last month? Why are you still talking to him? Most likely he just wants to screw you, too. Do you really think he's your friend because you're so nice? He sounds like bad news.

In any event, it sounds like maybe you need to associate with "better" people. Seriously.

This isn't *your* husband, is it? Is he someone you're dating? I hope not. He doesn't sound like good husband material. He doesn't even sound like good human-being material. He sounds like a character in a television script.

Marriage, whether at a church ceremony or before a judge, comes with promises attached. Faithfulness happens to be one of them. This fellow doesn't sound like the promise-keeping type. Not at all.

Every time he argued with his wife, the ex was there for him...?? How many times did he argue with his wife? How many times did he start the argument himself? No, I don't want to know the answers.

The ex told on him...? Does she want him back? Why?

If I knew the guy, I'd probably chew him out. Then he'd try to make me feel guilty for "judging" him, and we would no longer be friends. I wouldn't let myself get into any conversations with him or anything. Some people have very persuasive tongues, but that's the best part of them. Surely you have better friends than that.

If he were *my* husband... well, he wouldn't be for long.

I am not sure I would continue to be his friend. It is possible she punctured the condom, more probable that it simply malfunctions or had a defect, but none of that would matter if he had not been cheating on his wife. If he will cheat on and lie to the one he is supposed to be sharing his life with, that to me speaks to his integrity and tells me he would not be a trustworthy friend. Unless he has proven that he has learned from his mistake, and gotten help to change.

First i would get tested for STDs, then I think he would very quickly become my EX husband and, hopefully, there were no children created from my marriage to him.
What a low life. Sorry--some things just call for "judgey"!

Maria divorced Arnold.
That's good enough for me.

I'm sorry - I don't think I could be friends with a "man" (and I use that term LOOSELY) like this.

IF it was **MY** husband? I would be livid.

I would demand an in-depth STD examination/check.
Then see if my marriage was worth salvaging...I would highly doubt it...especially if he can "claim" that the ex punctured the condom??? yeah...right...where was he when that happened??? (doh).

I don't care if we were arguing or not. You don't go running to your ex-wife for comfort....

He probably attempted to call you after that conversation in order to argue with you how much integrity he has. Sounds like he has as much integrity as the guy who was making it with his cousin.

I don't actually know one single solitary person on this earth who acts like either of these men - where do these people you know come from...

Dawn

From a dating perspective or a wife perspective. From a dating perspective, I'd do exactly what you did...run fast and far, end of story. From a wife perspective, yep, I'd divorce his sorrry butt.

"He jumped in front of the bullet" -doesn't make it right to go around shooting at people-I'm with you-he's a cad. I don't know if I could love someone I didn't trust-when I was younger and had the strength and the good looks I could, but now that I'm older, jaded, hopeless, careworn and generally just mad at the world-were I you, I wouldn't give him the chance to dupe me again...oh, and , he will.

Well obviously the guy isn't in it for the long term, he's in it for the 'right now'.

He wouldn't be my husband anymore - that's for sure!

My first marriage ended due to him being unfaithful - NO pregnancy was involved until after we'd decided to end the marriage (she got pregnant while our legal paperwork was drawn up. No he never told me that, but it didn't matter anyway - marriage was already over, even if not legally).

how would you handle a situation like this...
shouldnt the question be ..how SHOULD you handle a situation like this..
simple..tell condom boy to go "play" in someone elses "yard" because its only a matter of time before he gives you a nasty disease, or expects you to help raise kids that he has with someone else, if he admits to one "extra" child, chances are good, there are a whole lot more, you didnt marry a man ,you married a boy who doesnt want to keep it in his pants, call his "girlfriend"and tell her to come and get his things..before you throw them and him off the porch
K. h.

I would probably divorce him. There's a lot I put up with but that would be too much even for me. My husband has a child from prior to our marriage (as do I). Right before we took SD's mother to court to get custody of SD last year, I learned that he and SD's mother had hooked up a couple of times after my husband and I got married. That was bad enough and the only reason that I didn't go nuts over that was that at the time, it was in the best interest of my SD for us to present a united front against her mother to secure permanent custody of her. If there had been another child involved who I didn't know about, that would have made things much worse. It's one thing to hide an affair, it's a whole 'nother level of no integrity to hide the existence of a child and not be a parent to the child.

He wouldn't be my husband, anymore. And he'd better PRAY I didn't have an STD.

Is this the same loser you mentioned in another question. Why do you still talk with this jerk? Seriously, get away from him. TELL him not to contact you anymore. You are inviting trouble into your life, if you do not explicitly tell him to go away. Trouble is not fun, exciting, or interesting. So many people equate danger with excitement. Don't. trouble, is trouble.

Let me be clear.....Not justifying anything....but people do the most selfish things for the strangest reasons and one cannot judge. Obviously this man's weak character help dig his grave. Sounds like an undecided, needy man. No self esteem and had to get it in negative ways. Honestly, what man would create a life with another woman and tell his wife? Both the ex and the guy sound like they were selfish...him by going back to her each time and she for puncturing the condom and telling the wife. They belong together if you ask me.... and his wife, should just move forward. There's nothing she can do about the children. They exist, they need to be taken care of by their father, the mother will obviously sue for child support and its nothing you can ignore. I know it is the ultimate betrayal and it must hurt like hell, but she has to put it in perspective for what it is and figure out how to move forward. Good luck!