How to Cope with Newborn in Hospital

This is one of the hardest things to go thru! My 2nd and 3rd babies were each in the NICU for 3 weeks after they were born because of being preemie. You do feel guilty for not being with the other child no matter where you are at. My comfort came in knowing that my baby was in great hands in the hospital and wouldn't remember me being gone for a little while, but my older child would. I spent most of my time at home, but spent quite a bit of time at the hospital with my baby.
Believe it or not, but you'll feel lost once baby comes home because you get used to the hospital life real quick. It's a nice feeling knowing you don't have to go back and forth anymore!

No advice, but wanted to tell you how sorry I am that this happened, especially so close to the holidays. Hope this resolves soon and the your sweet baby will be able to come home soon with you!

Also really appreciate this post. It brings home how important it is to take GBS seriously, as you did. I have read posts here on Mamapedia that didn't see the seriousness of it, and that has always bothered me.

My thoughts and prayers are with you.
Dawn

Truthfully your 22 month old will never remember any of this. You need to do what you need to do for your daughter at this time...your son is going to be just fine. Esp with your DH with him.

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Your hubby can bring your son down to visit and then leave again.

I know it is not an ideal situation but you gotta do, what you gotta do!

~I bet your 22 month old wouldn't even notice if you postponed your family Christmas until you and baby sis came home. Do you have family who live close? If so, dad and son could open the gifts from other family members on the actual day and spend quality time and then you guys could have round 2 of Christmas later...doesn't sound like the worst thing in the world to drag out your Holiday and make it last longer! :)

I'm so sorry this has happened to you. I've never experienced this but I do feel your pain. Since your husband is laid off and is able to be home with your other child, is it remotely possible for him to make a couple of trips a day to see you in the hospital? Perhaps after you have breastfed your newborn and the baby is sleeping, you could pull away with your first born for a half hour or so and just take a walk around the hospital?

Spend the holidays... at the hospital if need be. Make it 'special' that way.... it cannot be helped.

Your eldest is only 22 months old, they do not have a full comprehension of Christmas or "Santa" yet... so don't feel guilty....

Ask the Hospital... and ask if your family can come for a visit... and maybe all have a nice holiday hospital meal together, there.
When I had my 2nd child, I was in the hospital for only 3 days... but my eldest child and my Husband would come and visit me as much as possible, and we'd get food from the hospital cafeteria and eat in our (my) room... my daughter LOVED that... she thought is was so neat...

all the best,
Susan

See, in Norway they keep the mother in the hospital in a "hotel" and there is no payment. This is for closeness, bonding and breastfeeding. I don't understand why they do not do this everywhere.

Can you not contact like a Ronald McDonald house or something or ask the hospital if they have family rooms for these reasons?

It makes no sense to me, keeping the mother from the child like this... poor things!

Where is the hospital? If you would like me to do some searching for such charity places next to hospitals I will! If not, I hope you can find a way.

Many happy thoughts sent your way x

Your little baby needs you and you are doing the right thing. Maybe if you think your DS can handle it, your DH can bring him to visit you both at the hospital. You're under a lot of stress and being very hard on yourself. Honestly, the holidays are just days. Your DS won't remember this time. Do what you have to do to help your DD get well. Take care of yourself as much as you can. Hugs!

Yikes...you have to be where you think you are needed. I have to believe that she needs you...and that your son who is 22 mos old won't remember that you weren't there at this time next year.

I will pray for your little girl, and for your husband to get another job very quickly!!!

It may be grueling.. but being there for your infant to nurse is EXTREMELY important - because it will help her get better sooner. Your anitbodies, specific enzymes/proteins/fats/vitminas/lactoferrin are EXTREMELY important to her health. If you allow them to give formula, you are allowing foreign proteins and bacteria into her body and will inflame her immature and open GI system, which will not help her.

Maybe go often to nurse her, and some of those times have husband and son go with you while you are nursing. Start pumping A LOT and stocking up so you can give the hospital your breastmilk with the implicit knowledge of no formula for your baby. Ask the hospital for a pump, I'm sure they'd let you have one while there.

I would put off Christmas for a while until you are at home. He won't know the difference anyway. If you can pump, then the hospital will have that to feed if you are home spending time with him. Ask the nurses if there is a place you can spend time with your son while you are at the hospital; that way your son can come see you and you don't have to leave. They've dealt with this before and may have good suggestions. If one blows you off, ask a different one.

I just wanted to tell you I feel for you! I had a very similar situation (only 1 round of antibiotics) and my son's levels were up so he had to stay at the hospital a couple extra days to monitor the GBS and jaundice as well. He had an IV in his head and it was the worst few days of my life being in the hospital with him and worrying about it. I can't imagine doing it at least 2 weeks! I hope it gives you comfort to know that my son came through it just fine and is totally healthy and normal now at age 2. So keep your chin up! Don't stress about Christmas, like the other posters said, you can always do your own version of Christmas when you and baby get home! My thoughts and prayers are with you!

Here is what I can tell you who has had 2 babies in the hospital. The first one was in the NICU for 3 weeks after being born at 32 weeks. My husband and I would spend almost all of our time at the hospital. At the time we had 2 other kids, ages 5 and 7. They could stay with grandparents, but it wasn't the same. They needed us!! While I too was nursing, he did not latch right away and needed a tube to be fed through. I just pumped and they fed him the breastmilk if I was not there to feed him. The hospital will store your milk and give it to her if you are not there. The baby needs you, but she is unaware that you are even there right now. I know how scary it is to have a baby in the hospital, but the NICU and baby nurses are AWESOME and are the most caring that you will ever see. The even were the ones that told me I needed to go home for a break and get some rest and spend time with the other kids. You have to make sure to take care of yourself and your body as well. You need to make sure that you spend time with your 22 month old as well because even though he may not remember this for the future, he will react now. He could see this as an abandonment by you and he could throw fits. He could also become very attached to dad and not want you which could be worse when dad gets a new job. The second time we had a baby was for jaundis and she spent about 1 week in the hospital. This was baby #4 and once again I was nursing. I did spend all but an hour in the hospital each night. Grandma came and stayed, and husband was there and worked, but once again it was hard. They all would come to the hospital to visit so they could see me and the baby, but it was still hard. While none of this was at the holidays, it still never makes it easy. We tried to keep their lives as normal as possible, and still had them go to school, go to sports and eat their meals at home. Good luck with everything and I wish you all the best for the Holidays and for your husband to find a job very soon!!

I can not to even begin to imagine how hard this is. My youngest has asthma and has been in the hospital several times, not as an infant though. She is the youngest of 3 and it is hard to stay with a child in the hospital but you do for each child based on their needs t certain points in their lives things happen. I agree to wit to do Christmas when you get home and your son wont remember any of this. Good luck!

I'm not sure what to tell you about the holidays, but the hospital I delivered in offered rooms to parents whose babies were still there. My son had jaundice and they wanted to discharge me the day before they were going to discharge him. I was nursing and all that made my head spin. they had 2 rooms on the L&D floor that were smaller and they "rented" them for $10.00 per night for situations such as this,