How Old to Go to the Park by Self - at Bottom of Street?

older/never/depends...

My daughter is 12, nearly 13, and I don't see a reason for her to go to the park by herself.

I tell her "take a friend" (It's much more fun.)

Occasionally she is allowed to include the park on her "walk the dog" outing. (By herself, with dog. She knows to ask first.)

Stay protective mama....I would not let a little girl or boy go to the park alone. At around 10, I would consider it IF they went with a few friends. NEVER alone. This is a very different world, even in the nicest neighborhoods.

Blessings....

Only with a buddy
only if she and buddy ride their bikes
only if she keep her phone on and call me
Not at 8, maybe at 10 or 11, 5th grade

The thing is, things are NOT NOT NOT more dangerous now than they were when we were kids. Your kid has a .00001% chance of getting swiped.

I believe in safety in numbers, being aware of your surroundings, and preventative education. Don't go help that guy in the van that you don't know find his puppy. If someone starts driving slowly past you, get away. If someone gets hurt, know what to do... etc, etc, etc.

I would start slowly; let her and her friends walk by themselves, and you leave 10 minutes after they do. While you're there, read a book, don't hound the kids (stop pushing, slow down, etc).

Then increase the time; leave 30 minutes after she does. Never let her go alone.

Then start leaving before her; make sure she has a watch, knows how to tell time, and when you expect her to be home (and not one minute later!)

The only way we're ever going to teach our kids independence and self confidence is if we cut the umbilical cord!! I say go for it, and GOOD FOR YOU for taking baby steps towards this!!

My kids are 6 and 8, and I let them ride their bikes down the street to the stop sign (just out of eye sight) and back; they have never once had a problem, and have never once let me down. You know your kiddo better than anyone else, it's up to YOU to start trusting her and guiding her!! :)

I agree with Rachel too. It's much much much more dangerous to drive her in your car to school looking at statistics. Now my son is 9 and I would not let him go because he is naive, irresponsible, and has ADD. If your DD could be safe about it, then I don't see a problem. This is with the buddy system though. There should be a friend with her in case she gets hurt or she should have a phone on her.

Things are no different than when we were kids. The only thing that has changed is parenting styles and news coverage.

My older two were around four when they were allowed to run around the subdivision as were all the other kids running around the subdivision. With my younger two it was around seven when the kids started playing together.

Although a subdivision is a bit different than a park I am sure there would be a few helicopter moms or moms with younger kids at the park to point out that guy looks rather creepy.

I remember when my older two were playing and my dad came over to watch them. He went down to get them for dinner. When I got home he said you have a really friendly bunch of neighbors. They all came up and talked to me, asked the kids if they were having fun..... Yeah, dad, they never met you, they wanted to make sure the kids were supposed to be with you.

Thankfully my neighbors still look out for each other.

I wouldn't let her go by herself. Have the other kid go with her if possible.
Your little girl could be snatched in the blink of an eye, if she isn't alone it reduces the chance.
Unfortunately, things aren't like they used to be.

Totally depends on the area!!!

We live on a 4 lane 35mph street. The park at the bottom of our hill (also only about 1.5 blocks away) is at the intersection of 2 major streets (ours at 35mph, and a main drag at 40mph) on one side, and a 5 way intersection of minor streets. The apartments across the street from the park have 9 sex offenders living in them, and the park buts up against a greenspace known for homeless activity, some recent attacks, and loose dogs. Add in that it's a university area (aka lots of drunk drivers at all hours) just for fun, and a 5 way intersection near the park that is a frequent spot for accidents, jumping curbs onto the sidewalk, etc. ((We actually live in a very nice area... it's just NOT kid friendly.))

Anyone think my 9yo should go to the park by himself?

But when we're up in the mountains, I let him go all OVER the ski area by himself. Miles and miles of trails.
On a military base? Also no worries.
In a small town? No worries.
On the farm? (100acres) No worries.
In pockets of the city that are more suburban and he's going with a group of friends? No worries.

How things are different from when I was a kid is that
a) We live in a totally different KIND of area than when I was a kid
b) Most families round here are dual income, and most kids are in daycare until 6pm (aka there isn't the rough and tumble wolf pack of kids playing throughout the neighborhood and parks).

When I was a kid, I lived in a 'kid-friendly' area, that was swarming with kids. Safety in numbers. Here and now... my son and I are often the ONLY ones at the park except for a handful of parents with preschoolers.

I'm with Riley on this. Depends on the child and the area.

I also live 1.5 blocks from a (tiny) park and probably within the next two years, my children will be allowed to walk there by themselves. They are 3 1/2 and 4 1/2 now and are allowed outside without me being with them, though I check in with them every 10 minutes and stay by the windows.

Why? We live 20 minutes from town, in a quiet little neighborhood. A car will go by our house every hour or two, and the speed limit is 20 mph. There aren't any (registered/convicted) sex offenders w/in our neighborhood and those of us w/ littles are familiar with each other (and them with each other). Kids around here hang out together and are really comfortable with the area. Nothing is completely without risk. That being said, I *think* when mine are 5 and 6 or 6 and 7, I'll be just fine with them going down to the park (or on a walk) by themselves.

I would not let her go alone. Maybe if she were going with the other kid, but not alone. My DD is almost 10 and just this past summer I started letting her ride her bike up and down our street alone.

Times are different now. When I was a kid, ALL of the mothers in our neighborhood were home and ALL of the kids were outside all day/every day. We ran the neighborhood starting at about 4 or 5 years old and all of the moms kept an eye for the kids. Now, everyone is gone all day and there are no kids outside.

It's better to be safe than sorry!

I agree 100% with Rachel.

My boys went to the park unsupervised at age 8. They are now 9 and 10 and ride their bikes all over the neighborhood. They both have watches and know when to check in.

Things are NOT that much different. Actually, compared to 30 years ago, there is much less crime and danger.

Check out Lenore Skenazy's book "Free Range Kids" for some excellent statistics. Really, your daughter has a better chance of winning the lottery and being struck by lightening than she does of being snatched.

30-the link shows the registered sex offenders in your town-and believe when I tell you-they aren't hanging out at the police station-they are in places where there are children-and they only need a tiny window of opportunity!!!

http://www.city-data.com/so/so-Arvada-Colorado.html

As long as she were with a friend, I would let her go. I would give her a time that she has to come home and check in - about 45 minutes at the most. Can she read a watch? I do let my GD roller blade around the block and play at the playground, but I always give her a time to come back and check in and she hasn't missed it yet. Eventually I will lengthen the time before she has to check back, but 45 minutes is long enough for right now. I worry but I also know that she is growing up (she'll be 10 in March) and I have to start giving her a bit of freedom, if for no other reason than to see how she will handle it.

My kids are 12 and 9. I don't let them go to the park together, and its just one street over from us AND the police dept across the street from us. My kids don't have cells yet. However, I do let them play WITH neighborhood friends in the greenbelt behind our house but ONLY with other friends, not even just the 2 of them. I wouldn't feel comfortable letting an only child go to the park by themselves. Do you know who is at the park possibly waiting for a little girl to show up by herself? What if there is a wild dog or snake or something and she is by herself and gets hurt? I don't know, count me as overly protective but I bet all those parents that let their kids go somewhere by themselves and then never saw them again, didn't let them go now. Good luck.

Even with your child supposedly have such a low chance of being abducted, the fact remains that there is a chance. I wouldn't want to see my child being even a "tiny" statistic for anything bad. Why can't she play in the yard? Why would it be easier/better for her to go to the park?

It may not even be a stranger that puts your child's life in danger. It could very well be someone she knows. It may not be an adult, it could be another child. Obviously, it's up to you, but the fact that you are hesitant means SOMETHING. That makes me think that deep down you feel should not allow her to go. You shouldn't be on this forum asking a bunch of people who don't even know your daughter. There is no such thing as a "safe" area. The "safe" areas are the ones that always make it on the news with people being shocked that something terrible could happen in their area. *Rolling my eyes* Anyway, no matter what you decide, I wish you and your daughter the best.

I'd let her go in my neighborhood. Provided she went WITH someone, STAYED with that someone, and kept her phone on.

:)

Even if my daughter is VERY responsible and mature and 'smart' and has good common sense and she is 9 years old... I would NOT let her.
At all.

Last year for example: a 12 year old was walking home from school. As she always does. In broad daylight. On a busy sidewalk street. There was a Man... following her in his truck. When she realized this, she started running, he started going faster, too. Good thing, she thought to then go BACK to the school. The guy in the truck, couldn't just all of a sudden reverse his vehicle and continue following her.

On another occasion here locally: a child was snatched, while walking to school. A child about that age too. An older child.

These were in "good" neighborhoods. With lots of people around.
AND the child was not alone.

Thus, I would NOT let my kids, go to a park by themselves. No matter how smart they are.

Times are so different now.

When I was little, I'm talking 3 or 4, maybe 5, I was outside with the rest of the neighborhood kids, running around all day, playing at the park, in and out of different friends houses but the world isn't safe for that anymore.

Do you trust your daughter? Do you know your neighbors? Do you feel safe in your neighborhood? Most importantly trust your gut. If your Mothers Intuition doesn't tell you it's ok, don't do it.

I wouldn't get a moments rest if mine left by themselves. I would say at that age mine could go with a group, along with an older child. Maybe things aren't more dangerous now. But if my mom knew the dangerous situations I found myself in, she would pass out. Thank God Almighty nothing bad ever happened, but I put myself in harms way many times. I let my girl move around the neighborhood with friends her own age at 11, but only for short periods of time, in the daylight and only within a few blocks.

We didn't allow SD to go to her friend's house alone til she was 10. It depends on the maturity of the kid and the location, but I would be cautious about sending my DD somewhere I couldn't see her til she was older.

My sks didn't walk to school alone til middle school (11). Part of that was the necessity of daycare. My sister and I walked to school alone by 3rd grade, but it was a very, very small town (barely had a PO).

While stranger abductions actually are statistically rare...even in our area, which like yours I'd call a "safe, pretty protected neighborhood," some guy started hanging out at one of the local parks. Not approaching kids but hanging around when there were kids there. Moms and nannies noticed him and were very creeped out by this guy, though what became of him I don't know. Could have been entirely innocent but it was talked about in ways that indicated that parents and nannies found something about him "off." So...would you be OK with that?

I would not let my child go to a park alone.

I would at least send her with a friend. My 9 year old rides his bike to scouts alone but I know that he is ending up with adult supervision when he gets there. I will let him go to the park if he is with a friend or older sibling.

My daughter is 11 and I wouldn't let her go. I feel like this- things are fine until they aren't, know what I mean? She is probably old enough to go assuming nothing goes wrong. But would she REALLY know what to do in an emergency? I just worry that kids don't really know what to do, despite proper training, a real scenario is much different.

If you let her go, at least have her go with a friend.

It is totally up to you. If you are not comfortable with it, then don't. My oldest is 6, so I don't know how I would feel. Give it another 6 months and see how you feel then! What's okay for others doesn't have to be okay for you:)

We just started to let my daughter go the park WITH a buddy, and a cell phone and she is 10.

I have a 9 year old and a 6 year old who I let go to the park by themselves sometiems, acctually they are usually with a group of other kids. It is about a block and a half away from my house too! I think it is fine, we live in a pretty safe, quiet neighborhood. And I often find an excuse to walk the dog over to where they are or just look out my window upstairs to catch a glimpse of them it's a pretty unobstructed veiw). I know that there is always danger of someone abducting them, but you can't live your life in fear. I have a close family member who was assulted in a public place when she was 17, but she chooses not to let that stop her from going out and living a normal life. Bad things CAN happen, but they are the exception, not the rule. Make sure you talk OFTEN about protecting yourself and what to do if you feel unsafe. There is a family who we are friends with who lives closer to the park than us so my kids have a back up plan to just running home, they can go there instead if they need to. Good luck, it is never easy letting go, even a little bit, but it is good for your child! She is at an age where she needs just a little bit of independence.

Oh, another factor to consider is that childhood obesity is really being encouraged by the mindset that many paretns have that it is never safe to just let their child go outside and play. Remember that your child NEEDS physical activity to stay healthy!

If you're feeling hesitant, I think that you have your answer. You her mom, your gut tells you what's best. Trust it:)