How Old for Valentines Day

Updated on February 17, 2008
A.M. asks from American Fork, UT
9 answers

this is my daughter's7th grade year, she brought valentines for her friends and they didn't for her, they said they felt wierd, like someone would think they "liked "eachother. She felt silly and hurt, but was strong...I still gave them valentine, but she'll always be my baby.

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So What Happened?

yea I still love valentines day, I told her how sweet she is ,and to never change and not to grow up too quickly, I'ts her sweet spirit that makes us all happy to be around her, and maybe her friends didn't think about it and just plain felt awkward for not getting her one, but she made them very happy... I always try to stress the not growing up too fast thing, she's only been around 12 out of 100 years! take the time to be a kid. thanks everyone...

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M.B.

answers from Denver on

Have her stick to close friends. Ask about a wk ahead of time hey wanna do something fun just us for V-day? See how it goes! I had something similar happen to me. I will say NO MORE valentines that ya get as a young kid to hand out at school.
Good Luck and Good Job for her being so strong!

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A.H.

answers from Grand Junction on

Encourage her to buy valentines forever, and start with the story of what Valentine's day is. I read a wonderful more secularized version in Teacher's Friend Idea Book, isbn ###-###-####. It's short, and ends with

"As years went by, the phrase "From Your Valentine" became known as a symbol of love, friendship and affection. St. Valentine is remembered by young and old alike for his devotion and giving nature each year on February 14th."

Although for peers for a while, the gesture of the cards will seem quaint, even child-like, but it will always have significance and importance to your daughter.

It's never about the Valentines you get, but about the Valentines you give.

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J.L.

answers from Billings on

How sweet of your daughter and good for her for being strong. I don't think she is too old for Valentine's. I am 33 and still give/receive cards, etc. from my family and friends. I think our kids are growing up too fast and it is fun to see the fun sayings and things people write on the cards. How unfortunate that her feelings were hurt.

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A.S.

answers from Denver on

My daughter is also in 7th grade and she and her friends exchanged valentines. The group did not include boys, maybe that was the difference??!! I have four kids from 17 to 6 years of age (3 boys 1 girl)and they will never be to old to receive a valentine from their mom and dad! Like you said, she will always be your baby.

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T.B.

answers from Salt Lake City on

Never too old......

My daughter is 15 and still does them, it is how they are presented, haha. She has confidence that they are cute and "cool" and it let's her friends know she cares.

As they get older, maybe she wants to do just her friends, not the whole class........
Also, my daughters high school does a fun thing where it is $1- and goes towards the school. you can send a Valentine Gram to a friend, It is basically a little card and a piece of chocolate.
They do this for eachother, again, friends only, not the whole shabang.

Tell your daughter, these things happen, one day she will give a Christmas gift and there won't be one in return, it is ok, it is about having fun and giving. We are all people here on this earth and she did a wonderful thing by sharing a bit of her "sunshine" with the class! Too bad the other kids are feeling they need to "grow up quickly" and not particpate, or look at it in ad odd way.

She did a fun thing and as long as she has confidence in that it shouldn't shake her, I say........." Do it again next year girl!"Put a smile on your face and deliver some love and sunshine to this world.

xoxo
T. B.

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C.M.

answers from Pocatello on

A.,

You can let your daughter know that I am 38 and a grandmother :) I STILL buy Valentine's for people that mean something to me and that I'm grateful to have in my life.

It is one day out of the year that we celebrate and recognize everyone that touches our life in a positive way.

Please tell her to NEVER quit giving Valentines to people. There is no shame in saying that you care for one another. As these classmates mature they will realize you can "like" someone without being in love with them.

I'm proud of her for staying strong and holding her own. What a special famiy you must have !Obviously, you are raising a womderful girl and apparently doing a great job at it.

BTW... Happy Valentine's Day

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L.B.

answers from Colorado Springs on

I just read your note and the part where you said your daughter's friends didn't give Valentine's back to her and she felt hurt really struck a note for me. My daughter is 14 and she is learning that it is better to give than to recieve. Our girls have big hearts and will give to their friends because they are special in their lives. I think giving the message to our daughters that giving with no strings attached is the best advice with can give them. Give just to give and because you want to give regardless of what any one thinks or what you don't get back in return. This is definately a tough age to convince them that's a good thing, but eventually they will get it and want to continue to give with no expectations in return. By the way, my daughter still gives Valentine's but she only gives to her closest and dearest friends now. It makes her feel good to make someone's day. Simple as that. Thanks for sharing your story.

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H.

answers from Provo on

Sorry your daughter had to go through that... as for you giving them valentines- Never too old for a valentine from mom!! I still get them from my mom :)

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M.R.

answers from Fort Collins on

My daughter's in 8th grade this year. I asked if she was going to give valentines this year. She said Mom, kids aren't the same anymore. I would be just wasting your money. So I bought her a heart bracelet & necklace and told her that no matter how old she gets, she'll me my valentine too and their loss.

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