How Do I Get My Son to "Poop" in the Potty???

Updated on May 19, 2006
R. asks from McKinney, TX
9 answers

My son is 2 1/2 years old and has been potty training for a few weeks now. He has done really well so far. He wears underwear everyday and he pees in the potty all the time. He never really wets his underwear anymore and he will even hold it if we are in the car until we get home. The problem? He still always poops in his pants instead of the toilet. He tells me when he does it and I get the feeling that he knows that he shouldn't but he always does anyway. I have tried to get him to the potty several times a day to get him to poop but he never does. Not long after we sit on the toilet, he goes in his underwear!!!! Does anyone have some advice that I could try that might help us get over this mess. It is getting pretty annoying and GROSS!!! I know that this is just part of training but I feel stuck. Thank you for any help that I can get.

R.

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E.C.

answers from Dallas on

I remember watching something similar on Nanny 911 or Supernanny. The mom would take the little boy into the bathroom and tell sing a poo poo song that you can just make up and then when he did go in the toilet you have like a little party maybe a little confetti a little dance and sing a I went in the potty song. What I did for my daughter was get a decorated box (they can help decorate) and fill it with toys or snacks they like and you tell them that if they go poo poo in the potty they will get to close their eyes and pick something out of the box. Hope one of these work for you !!

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K.

answers from Dallas on

We had the same problem 2 months ago when we potty trained my 2 1/2 year old son. I took him to the toy store and let him pick out 3 toys (his choice, luckily they were all under $10!). I told him he couldn't have the toys untl he went poopy in the potty, and I kept reminding him. The next day, he went in the potty, and he's has been doing awesome ever since. Congrats on this huge milestone, and good luck with it!

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N.V.

answers from Oklahoma City on

Hi R.,

I think what you are experiencing is quite common. I was fortunate enough that my son never pooped in his underwear...I guess I just kept him in pull-ups long enough b/c I didn't want to have to deal with that. But Jacob used to do the same thing as far as I knew he had to go, he would sit on the potty and would not poop. That's when I used to put a pull-up on him b/c I didn't want him to get constipated by holding it and he would go as soon as I did this. Well, one morning I gave him oatmeal for breakfast....a sure thing that I knew he would have to go and probably not be able to hold it. I knew w/o question that he had to go and when I put him on the potty he refused. As much as I didn't want to, I kept him naked and he ended up going on the floor in a corner. Sounds really gross, but this horrified him enough that he never did it again and has been putting his poop in the potty ever since. Not that this will work for every kid, but this is what worked for me. Good luck! N.

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L.S.

answers from Dallas on

I suggest having your son clean up his own mess. This is not a punishment at all and should be done with a positive attitude, but it is called 'logical consequences.' The logical consequence of pooping in your pants is that you have to take off the underwear yourself, put whatever firm poop there may be into the potty, flush it, run water over the underwear, wipe off your bottom (with wet wipes), and go put on fresh undies. And you have to do all of this immediately when you poop, which means you will have to miss whatever you're watching on TV, come in from playing with your friends outside, put away whatever toys you were playing with, etc. Of course, you will have to supervise all of this activity so you don't end up with a messy bathroom, but it will teach your son to be responsible for his own actions. Bottom line is that he's probably just not ready to poop in the potty yet.....give it a few weeks to a few months and he'll naturally be ready. But in the meantime, there is nothing wrong with allowing him to experience the consequences of his behavior.

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K.K.

answers from Dallas on

Hi R.,
Well you may not like this advice but I have worked with children of potty training age for several years...the one thing I have found that does help is to not make is so easy for him. When he does have an accident, have him help you change his soiled clothes. The more he can do the more effective. I am not suggesting in any way that this be a punishment or anything of the sort...it is just what happens when we have accidents...pee pee or poo. I stayed encouraging and positive but just explained.."I need your help with this...please take off your pants and put them in the bag (washer, etc.)" Have him use wipes to clean himself...and so on.

It is SO common for kids to do this so take it easy on yourself. Also realize that learning to pee is a different sensation than learning to poo. It is essentially like learning two different skills not one. It will come but let him be an active learner instead of you doing all the dirty work. Of course lots of handwashing and sanitizing will need to take place.

Other things to consider:
Does he go at the same time everyday? IF so, have him sit and try about that time. Set a timer if need be to keep him on the potty longer..."oh, sorry honey, the timer is not finished yet"

Maybe plan a favorite activity for just after he goes..."we can't go outside until you go potty"

Avoid power struggles...this is one of the last major things a child has control over, so if it turns into a struggle...game over.

Good luck, and hang in there.
K.

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M.H.

answers from Dallas on

Have you tried the dunk the cherrio game? It worked with my nephew. My daughter just turned 2 ansd has taken an interest in wanting to use the potty. She does good most of the time. I reward her with stickers. You could try skittles or m & ms.
Good luck

If you are in need of child care, I have an opening in my home day care. I just moved to Mckinney from Allen-we just needed more space. ###-###-####
M.

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A.N.

answers from Dallas on

I just wanted you to know you are not alone. My 3yo is the same way. However, I still am putting him in pull ups for the pooping issue. I know eventally he will get it, but it is gross. If you find anything that works, post it for all to see please! Good luck!

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K.

answers from Dallas on

Very frustrating, I know! I have read that it takes boys longer to learn how to control their bowels than little girls, sometimes over 3 years. My son knows when he has had a b.m., but I honestly don't think he knows he can control when it comes out. We go through the same thing...sitting on the potty, then, sometime afterward, he'll fill his diaper and tell me. I know he can feel it in his diaper, but I don't think, like I said, that he knows yet, how to hold it in. What I read stated that it takes longer for boys to learn to control that muscle in their bottom...just my 2 cents.

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C.H.

answers from Dallas on

We bought "poo-poo treats" for my daughter. I started out giving her a special kind of candy, but then I decided I didn't want her to have sugar every time she poops! So, I bought small toys instead. I keep them in a special location in the kitchen where she can see them at all times. That way, they're a constant reminder that she'll get to play with her new toy the next time she poops on the potty. She still has accidents, but it's definitely a good incentive for her.
Good luck!

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