Recently, my 10 month old son has started hitting himself. Not hard, but if he doesn't get his way, he hits at his ear/side of his face. Any suggestions on how to curb this type of behavior? I don't want him to develop a propensity for hitting which could turn into something worse when he's older. I'm trying not to stress over something that could be minor (or maybe not), so if anyone has suggestions and/or has some experience with this, I welcome hearing from you.
Thanks everyone for your great suggestions. You've certainly given me enough to consider. I have decided to ignore the behavior, at least for now - a couple of weeks to see if the hitting stops. I've been ignoring the hitting, which he immediately stops after a couple of swats at his ear/side of face. He seems to only do it when he has been told "no". When he does it he looks at me for a reaction - so far so good, I haven't reacted and he stops. If it continues or gets worse, I will follow the other suggestion and that's to hold his hand firmly and tell him no. He's only 10 months, so I'm not sure how much of it he really understands, although, kids are much smarter and perceptive than we think.
Thanks again!
P.
My 20 month old was doing that too around 1 year! it was really troubling - sometimes he would do it really hard you could hear the SMACK! the dr. said to ignore it and it would stop - it was REALLY hard to do but we ignored it for a few days and before we knew it he stopped! Its instinct to react but try giving no response at all and see if it stops
A. Haddigan
www.BabysitEase.com
My son tried this too a couple of times. Whenever you see him doing it, get on his level and firmly tell him no, while holding his hands. Tell him it is not okay for him to hurt himself. Do it everytime you see him hitting himself, and he will stop shortly. I also would hug my son and tell him I did not want him to be hurt, and that seemed to help. Good luck!
my son also started displaying similar behavior around 10 months old. It seemed to be a temporary experiment with a way of showing some frustration or unhappiness. He banged his head around a little bit, too.
But we never paid the behavior much attention. Instead, we tried to offer something to distract him, or tried to figure out what he was asking for. He seemed to appreciate when we could respond a little better to his very limited communication skills.
So that's my advice - just let him vent his frustration and continue to try to communicate with him in a positive way. As he develops his language and pointing skills, he'll eventually move on to other ways to express himself.
BTW, our son is now 19 months old. the stage where he was hitting himself and other things passed a long time ago. Now he's moved on to much BIGGER behavioral challenges. lol
Gently press his hands down to his side, look into his eyes, and firmly say "no." Stay calm.
Completely normal! The best thing to do is pretend like it doesn't concern you at all. Ignore it, or ask him...does that feel good? You are only hurting yourself! They grow out of it even though it seems like they won't! Good luck, and be glad he isn't potty training yet! haha!
Thank you for posting this question. My now almost 3yr old son smacks hisself, upside his head usually. He does it when he is mad or frustrated. I always just figured it was frustration, but thought in the back of my head about what if its a sign of something bad or what if he is hurting himself or what if this turns into something more destructive.
So its nice to hear that its "normal". It happens less frequently now, but I will be sure to just hold his hand and let him know its not nice to hit himself and help him find the patience and words to let us know what he needs to say. Goodluck to you too.
This is a really normal phase. At this age their frustration and inability to communicate their feelings translate into hitting. Despite what some people think, this is pure instinct. It's really the only way he knows to show you he's upset and/or frustrated. We as humans are born very emotionally immature compared to other species. The human psyche is a delicate thing that takes decades of guidance to reach full maturity. Just keep in mind that he doesn't have the words yet. If he's able to indicate affirmative or negative to a question (yes or no in some fashion, my littlest one at this age said "good" for yes and "not" for no) then I would suggest getting on his level and trying through gentle, simple questioning to help him figure out why he's upset. Do this every time and you will be building a foundation for him of talking through his difficulties instead of reacting physically. Eventually, when his vocabulary starts to catch up to his needs, he'll be able to tell you about his feelings instead of displaying them in a physical fashion. Gentle guidance is the key. Show him through example and through walking him through it himself just what the best ways to deal with frustration and anger are.
I had a rule for my children: You may not hurt yourself, others or things. I would tell the child he is not allowed to hurt others by hitting. If he does so, stop him with hugs. Be consistent. Babies understand more than what we may think they do. AF
At 10 months, I wouldn't worry about this becoming 'something worse'. It sounds like he's frustrated and with limited verbal skills, kids tend to act out their frustrations. I would offer a very limited explanation, like, "no, baby, don't hit yourself" then distract him. He'll likely forget all about hitting or whatever upset him in the first place.
