Hi I Need Help I Have a Older Sister That Was Adopted I Know Were She Was Born

If you can’t find her through free searches, you may want to take a DNA test through ancestry.com or 23andme. Lots of people find relatives that way. Best of luck!

If you know the city and state call the police department and see if they will tell you who the chief of police was 34 years ago. At least then you will have a name.
But be prepared, your sister may not have any desire to connect with you. After all you are a stranger, even if there is blood. Also what if she was never told she was adopted? Just be careful and don't only think about YOUR feelings.

You have no clue if this woman wants to be contacted. Your mother, I assume it was your mom who told you, told you and now you feel the need to search heaven and earth for her. WHY?

You need to know if your mom is okay with this. She is the one who gave her up for adoption. Did she ask you to find her? If so, great. But otherwise? I would tread lightly on this one.

You can call the city police department where you know she was born and ask for the police chief's name. You can find him on facebook, twitter, instagram, snapchat, or whatever and find out if he told his daughter (yes, she's his daughter as it doesn't take DNA to be a parent) she was adopted. You tell him who YOU are and ask if she's open to contact. if she's NOT? You respect her wishes and leave well enough alone.

P.,

Welcome to mamapedia.

You're saying that your mother had a child before you that she gave up for adoption, correct?

This other girl most likely does NOT know you exist. Does your mother know you are looking into this. WHY is this "tearing you apart"??

Start with your mother. Ask her if she has your permission to find your sister. Then you start with searches on the city and town, if you know she was adopted by the "chief of police" then you google who was the chief of police in Tulare (or wherever she was born) and then find out where that person is now...and then reach out...,use facebook, linkedin and other social media sites (Twitter) to see what you can find out.

Just know you shouldn't go walking up to her and say "Hi. I'm P. and I'm your sister." you don't know what she's been told about her birth and parents.

Good luck. I hope you get the peace you need. This shouldn't be "tearing you up". Keep in mind - maybe she doesn't want to be found either. Sorry but that can happen sometimes.

You need to do some more detective work.
Are your parents or grandparents not available to ask?
You might have to hire a private detective to get more answers.
Some dna sites might have some ideas.

Have you ever watched the show the Troy Dunn The Locator? That's what he does, google him it looks like there is a step by step guide on how to find a lost family member on amazon.

Good Luck!

Hi, when I found out my mom had given up her first child I was lucky enough to hear about a national non profit organization that helps connect adoptees with their birth families. It’s called the international soundex registry. If both birth mom and adopted child register with them they connect them!

I first asked my mom if she minded I register. She said no it was up to me. So I registered with all the info my mom had and about a month later I received a phone call from them saying that my birth sister had registered also and to make sure we wanted to connect. I said yes! I then received a call from my new sister! My mom and I flew out to visit her and it has been a wonderful experience. What was amazing was she had had a great life but about a year earlier had been thinking about a possible family out there connected to her and she decided to register with the registry. It was so cool it was less than a year later we were connected. So she didn’t need to wait long.

I think this system is wonderful as it only connects if both parties register.

Good luck!

If you don’t have permission from your mom to reach out to this sister then you need to let it go & seek counseling. My aunt gave a child up for adoption over 50 years ago. She struggles with it even to this day but her and her husband decided it was best to leave it alone. She was 18, unmarried and sent away to have the baby. She told her husband & kids years later. Birth Mom has rights and those rights need to be respected just as much as the adopted child. I think you need to go on a database like a previous poster stated and just wait to be contacted. Don’t force the issue on the adoptive person because you want it.

Contact the city police department Human Resources and ask for archives list of past police chiefs. You’ll be able to near it down based on the year of her birth.
The police department is your best bet with the most resources to help you track down your sister.