Help with Bedtime Routine!!

Have you tried filling a spray bottle with water & let the kids help you spray the Monster/Dragon Away spray. Also give them a little night light. This helped my little boy so much. I know it sounds kinda nutty, but it is an idea.

Good luck !

Hey A., I have had the same problem with my son (now 3 1/2) since he was about 2. I have done the same thing, layed down with him EVERY night until he falls asleep. I don't know the answer either, because mine is scared of the dark and shadows. I am trying my mom's technique (after trying all of my own and those aren't working) and the past two nights I have tried to whisper to him as I read books and say prayers, staying speaking SOFTLY and being gentle (instead of getting angry as I was doing after over an hour of telling him to stay in the bed and CLOSE his eyes and STOP talking!!!). I am noticing he does respond better (and I don't get my blood pressure up so much) if I just TRY to stay calm and speak soft, and distract him from his fears and whatever it is he wants to get back up to do. I still have no clue how to get him to do this ON his OWN. I can tell you that my daughter, now 8, used to be the same way, and by age 5 she was READY to be finally be a "big girl" and sleep by herself, even with the lamp OFF. So if it makes you feel any better, I feel they WILL outgrow it. I know it is so frustrating though, because I never get to spend time with hy husband at night because I usually end up falling asleep (after my son exhausting me) with him in his tiny twin bed. Just try to remember they will not be this age forever, and they just need reassurance and stuff. I know that doesn't help when you are desperately wanting them to get over this NOW so you and your husband can have time for yourself after kids go to bed. Trust me I KNOW! Pray about it and if things never go as Nanny 911 would have it, then it's not the end of the world. Kids aren't perfect and neither are parents, just do what you have to do to get some SLEEP and to get the child to sleep, and realize that this too, shall PASS. When it does, it's bitter sweet. One day we will miss them NEEDING us to sleep, I think (Hehe)...Or I have been told. Good luck and if you find a technique that works please let me know too. *Oh, I just remembered one thing I did for my daughter that worked, I got her a toy Jesus figurine at the Dollar Store (around Easter) to sleep with and told her whenever she got scared to remember that Jesus was there with her to protect her. That was very effective with her.

Hi! I have 2 year old twin boys and an 8 month old. You and your husband need to try to stick to your guns about not laying down with the girls. If you could make it one night with out doing it, then they probably would stop. My boys have started asking us to lay down, get water, go potty, etc..anything to avoid "bedtime," but I just tell them it is night-night and walk out of the room. I do have to put them back in their beds and shut the door anywhere from 2 to 10 times per night (it was about 20), but that is much easier than laying with them until they fall asleep.

Hey A.~ We had this problem with our 3 yr old. So we started to look all around the room (under the bed, in the closet) etc. To make sure there were no "bears". Then we assure him that "bears" are NOT allowed in the house. That really soothes him. Good luck!
~C.

Do you think that it is really they are scared of dragons or they just want one of you in the room with them? If it is the dragons, I suggest coming up with some sort of "monster words" to help rid the dragons. Something like: dragons leave this room you don't belong here...and continue on with something of your own to personalize it. Walk around the room as if to let the girls know that you are making sure there are no dragons anywhere i.e. the closet, under the bed, etc. Try leaving on a night light, closet light, or hall light so they can see that there are no dragons. If it is that they want one of you to lay down with them; I know it's hard but tough love is what I suggest. My son is almost 5 now and he went through a stage similar to that. He has a lava lamp in his room that gives him light but it also distracts him because he can watch the lava make balls and different shapes. Hope this helps.

when my kids had phobias of things (bad dreams) I added it to a special night time prayer that I say to my kids each night. For Instance "Lord hear my prayer....please help _____have super good dreams tonight." It has worked for my kids.
jen

A.,
Speaking of Nanny 911; Here is just ONE of her suggestions! (I have tried this and it works, it just takes time, as with anything!)
You will prob. have to do this over a period of time but what she did (Nanny) was to sit on the floor of the room for say, the first night...so they can both see you...until they fall/go to sleep; I think even if they are screaming at this point they will stop just b/c they feel/see your presence in the room...once they know you are not leaving, they should settle down and sleep consume them. The key is to move just a little bit further toward the door each night (however many this takes!) until eventually, you are out the door and they can 'barely' see you...and I guess eventually you can put them down to bed, then vamboosh, you can really leave and go do whatever you need to w/out having to sit on the floor anymore...it is like a small bite of the elephant type of thing. Does this make sense? Anyway, it worked on the show and worked in my home. Good Luck.
Let me know if you try it!

I went threw the same exact problem with my son!!! The is to put a chair in the room and sit for about ten minutes. Start out to were they can see you but tell them they have to keep thier eyes closed or you will leave the room. Every night move the chair closer to the door and eventually you will be out. It does take time to break the habit.

Well, there are 2 schools of thought on this one. One group says let them cry it out and they will learn to self-sooth. I belong to the other camp! Your child is obviously having anxiety over something. And being only 2 yrs of age, they cannot communicate clearly as we adults can. Either they saw something with dragons that has thier imaginations going crazy (which they are too small to control) OR something else is going on which has been transferred/symbolized as a dragon. Either way they need you, so dont feel guilty for soothing them in the middle of the night - thats what we parents are there for!

What you could do is get books about dragons, and get them to tell you stories about the dragon and find out where this originated. Then maybe get a stuffed one and do a little role-playing in the evenings before bed, where the dragons are friendly and will actually protect them. Let them watch movies that present dragons in a good light. But most of all, listen to what they are telling you.

Hi A.,

I am sorry it is so hard getting the babies to sleep. I have b/g twins and mine are 22 months. :) It sounds like something is really getting to them. That is a long time for them to scream at night before going to bed, so they really are wanting you in there. You could think of a new routine. We calm down and hold ours for about thirty minutes or so before we put them to bed every night. I was scared to do that at first, because I didn't want them to get used to something...but, then I realized I was always going to be there to hold them at night anyway. I don't know if that is good/bad, but they love to go to bed and they never fight it. We are together, cuddling, in another room - not where they sleep. So, maybe separating that place might help them to prepare for bedtime. We actually sit and watch Shrek - oddly enough they will sit and watch that and nothing else (never had t.v. around) - they know it is calm down time, going to bed time...plus, they are feeling secure because they have been held and calm with us for thirty minutes or so. We never really let them cry in bed - then they will hate being in there. Although, my son gets spoiled and wants to be in bed with us and gets it in his head he can cry to come back to bed...but, you get to know the differen cries too. He has had to work through that. Every child is different though! :)

I hope things start to calm down.

When my daughter asks me to lay down with her, I tell her I have to go see daddy right now but I'll come back in a few minutes to check on her. Usually within 15 min or so she falls to sleep on her own. Sometimes she will cry for me after I leave. When she does that, I ask her if she wants me to close the door. When she says no, I tell her if she wants to keep the door open she has to be quiet. (She has a nightlight in her room so there is still light for her to see.) Every once in a while she will keep on crying so I close the door for a few minutes (about 3-5) which she usually cries the whole time. When I open the door, I ask her if she will be quiet now so I can open the door. She almost always says yes and quietens down.

Here are a few ideas:
1. Get a bottle of air freshner with a nice scent. Tell the kids it is dragon repellent and spray it all over the room before bed. Let them help if you want but make sure they see you do it.

2. Repeat this chant/song "Bad dreams go away, good dreams come and stay." This works great for my kids.

3. Play soft music.

4. Leave a nightlight or other dim light on in their room. My kids both have ceiling fans that are on dimmers. The kids get to dim the light to an acceptable level. We also leave the hall light on dim.

5. Make sure they have a favorite animal or toy to sleep with. My kids are allowed to sleep with 2 "friends". However, sometimes my dgt wants a third friend to sit in a chair next to her bed and watch her sleep. I think she fels like it is protecting her.

6. Gradually move out of the room. The first night, sit next to the bed until they fall asleep. Each night, move a little closer to the door until you are out of the room. Make sure they know you are there (cough or something) if they call for you but don't talk or go back to the bed. It may take some time but it should work if you stick with it.

Good luck!