Help with 21 Month Old Daughter Potty Training Issues

I would try taking her into the bathroom and not even put her on the potty. Just take some coloring books, puzzles, anything that makes her happy and make the bathroom a fun place to be. Occasionally ask if she would like to try to go potty and she will tell you when she is ready. The thing I have noticed though is that you need to decide not just when she is ready but when you are ready. Going between diapers and potty training too much can confuse the child and make it harder in the long run.

Some of the best advice I ever got while trying to potty train my daughter was that its a process. That she would go three steps forward and then two steps backwards, and its TRUE! My daughter would do fabulously for a while and then would stop and would actually go back to having accidents or even wanting to wear diapers instead of training pants. So, what you going through is normal.

Work with her. If she was having a difficult time going poop, like if she was constipated, then it may be a scary thing for her now. Keep encouraging her to go in the potty or at least to go into the bathroom when she has to go. I know you probably know this already, but don't shame her or scold her for any accidents she has.

I don't know if you want to go as far as I did, but at one point, I had to put my daughter back in diapers. She had a tantrum while on the big potty one day and fell in. Needless to say, she refused to get back on after that. Potty training stalled entirely. So, she wore diapers until she was willing to sit on her little potty again. It was frustrating and disappointing, but she did eventually get the hang of it all and seldom has accidents now.

It's perfectly normal.

We started potty training a little younger then you and went through the same thing. Our son would go back and forth on wanting to use it vs not wanting anything to do with it.

It has nothing to do with age, but with if they are ready or not (my cousin's kid was trained at 9 months). What finally did it fo my son, besides getting to wear Buzz Lightyear underware, was that his best friend at school was starting to learn too.

Patience is the key.

I'm sure you've received this advice already.... but let it go. She needs more time. I'm potty training my 5th child. Sometimes the kids feel like they are losing something of themselves if it goes down the potty. I know that sounds crazy! It can be traumatic. Give her some time, and most likely she will approach you about it when she is ready to try again. Hang in there!

Oh, i had the hardest time with potty training my first daughter. And what i found was the more i pushed the more she rebelled. Show her that the potty is still there. I would not push her though. In time she will start to want to go on her own. Or you can also show her how you go to the bathroom. I know that sounds weird, if she sees your not scared she may not be either. I ALSO HAD A REWARD JAR. EVERY TIME THEY WOULD GO TO THE BATHROOM ON THE POTTY THEY GOT A REWARD.WHAT EVER THAT MAY LOOK LIKE TO YOU.I DID M&MS AND WHEN THEY ARE FULLY POTTY TRAINED THEY GET AND M&M PARTY. I HOPE THAT HELP A LITTLE BIT.

She is very young. I can say if you do it too young then you will set yourself up for regression. My daughter potty trained at 26 mos then regressed right before she was three and then wasn't 100% until she was 39 mos. I think if I would have waited longer with her we could have been all doen before she was three.

With my son I waited for him to be ready, when he was ready it took one week, he was just three then and we were done 100% then two weeks later even at nighttime. No accidents, nothing. I think a lot is to be said for waiting for them and when they are truly really ready.

I would say don't push it, make it fun and encourage any interest but until she knows the urge, can go all night dry, can get her pants up and down by herself and truly wants to be in underwear there is nothing you can do but wait.

I am a firm believer that potty training should be done at 2, I find it is easier at this age and less of a control isuue in, but 21 months is also to young to do any real training, right know should only about introduction and the occasional pee-pee on the potty, otherwise they start to have a fear and the poop fear is normal, for some reason they don't like the "falling away" feeling and are used to it when it is closer to the body, I would put a diaper back on, and just ask if she wants to try, maybe when you are going potty and then once she hits 2 try again. I also like to let mine be naked from the bottom down and keep the potty chair close by so that they can get to it faster. Hope you get it figured out!

My advice is to not force anything. Just be casual about it. Potty training is the one thing they can control that you can't. I firmly believe that they will not be potty trained until they decide they are ready. If you are anxious and act worried, it will be stressful for your child. My oldest did the same thing. Pooping in the potty scared him. My son was almost 3 when he finally was trained, but once it happened, he never had an accident, even during the night. We were at a park with his 3 friends. They needed to use the potty, so he wanted to as well. No problems after that. I found, the more I pushed, the farther back it set us. With my next 2 daughters I learned to pay attention... when I realized they were pooping in their diapers, I would say, "oh, you are pooping! Good job! When you get bigger you can do that in the potty!" They both picked up on the getting bigger thing and decided they wanted to be bigger sooner rather than later. Also, I let my kids sit on their potty chairs even with there clothes on in front of the t.v. or while they were playing so they didn't feel like it was a scary place to be. Don't worry... it'll happen soon... I know it is frustrating changing a tiny baby's diaper, then turning around and changing a bigger kid's diaper when you know she is capable of going on the potty. She may just need to feel like she is still your baby sometimes. Hang in there!

We used a book called something like "Toilet Training in a Day". It's an older book. I have several friends that swear by it. One has used it for all 5 of her kids. It's definitely worth checking out. Most libraries have it. We love it, and it will work with 20 months or older.

My daughter will be 3 at the end of May and did the exact same thing. I asked my Dr. about it and he said that she will try again when she is ready and not to force the issue or she will be more reluctant. Of course we are a little more leanient on time with her because she was born 3 1/2 months early . I personally do not think that matters anymore but he will go potty when she is ready . She just started back to wanting to in the morning and at nigt before she goes to bed so that is a start again:)
Good luck.
R.

I bought my daugher a brand new potty chair and did the "potty trainning in a day"....it took much longer than a day. However it was a wonderful starting point and I did add my own little twist to the game. Every time she went pee she got a small piece of candy and every time she went poo she got five small pieces of candy. When she was acciedent free we gave her a princess potty party at chucky cheese. She did a wonderful job but there are set backs and they should be expected. If we were going out somewhere I would put a pull up on her and tell her that this is a "just in case" pullup. If she didn't wet her pullup she got candy for being a big girl when we got home. Currently I have a 13 month old daughter who has a harder time pooing and we stick her on the toilet when we know she has to go poo. She sits on the real toilet, hugs me and goes poo. When she is done we clapp our hands and cheer for her. When she is wiped and done we wave good bye to the poo and flush the toilet then clap and cheer again. Make potty training a fun family event that your child can be proud about and happy time. Keep it up even when it looks like they have it down. Your child will slowly lose interest in the treats when they are ready to be trained full time. I totally don't like giving my children candy and flavored drinks for health reason most of the time, but this is one time in their lives that I was a flavored drink and candy queen. I bought cherry flavored small packaged Kit Kats, they taste exactly like cherry chip cake with cherry frosting. Anyway, GOOD LUCK!!! KEEP IT FUN!!!

21 months is still pretty little. If you're still having problems with it, maybe wait a few more months and try again.

Hi! Don't give up! We had the same issues with our oldest son. We did a "poop jar" for him. We had a large jar that we fill with little dollar store toys and when he pooped in the potty he got to pick from the "poop jar" The weird thing was that the jar sat on top of the frig for about a week and a half before he decided it was worth it. I had almost given up and then it was like a light switch went on. For my daughter we did gumballs because that's "her thing".