I am going crazy with my 2 1/2 yr old daughter! She is now going through a stage where she will not stay in bed. I have been expecting this to happen and it definitely seems VERY common. She is actually not too bad, although I try to prepare myself for it to get worse. I put her to bed (between 7:30-8) at night after our nightly routine and about 20 min later, she comes walking down the steps. I'm really proud of myself because I have kept my cool and not gotten mad (LOL). I just pick her up, give her a kiss put her back in bed and walk out. She does this several times and is usually asleep by the time my husband and I go to bed around 10. Last night she only got out once and fell asleep. She gets up around 4 am and comes into my room and I pick her up and put her back into bed and she falls back asleep. So far, I can deal with the nighttime. It is her nap that is driving me insane. She would always take one nap around 1:30-2, but I have moved it up to around 12-12:30 so she won't sleep as late (she sleeps for 2 hours, sometimes 2 1/2). She is now getting up constantly and not napping. It is hard to keep taking her upstairs to put her back in bed because I have a 13 month old too. I can usually get them to nap at the same time, but sometimes it doesn't work out that way. Today I am especially frustrated because my husband and I have a company christmas party to go to tonight and we won't be picking the kids up from my in-laws until around 11 pm, so my daughter will have been up from 7 am until 11 pm. My in-laws are not very good about putting them to sleep and my kids have never slept anywhere but their cribs so it is not easy for them to get them to sleep. Should I just say screw it and not worry so much about this? I have a problem letting go and accepting when things don't go my way! Am I dwelling too much on this? I will not lock my daughter in her room, I don't like that because if there is ever something really wrong, I want her to be able to get to me. Please give me some perspective!!!
Thanks so much everyone! I was just at my wits end and I needed someone to give me some perspective, and to share advice and experiences. Liz A is absolutely right about me getting upset at things not going exactly the way I want them to. It is something I try to work on everyday because I know how unrealistic it is, especially with a 2 yr old. I will try the baby gate thing. I know this will pass and then it's on to the next phase! Thanks again everyone and have blessed holidays!
Workinmom echoed my feelings as well. Put a baby gate up outside her room. Can she climb the gate? Fine, put two gates up...one over the other. You'll know if something is really wrong, but she's not going anywhere.
I would do a baby gate. She can still yell for you, and you can even put a monitor in there, but she will stay in her room.
As far as tonight, I would relax with that one, screwed up nights happen and it is easier to just go with the flow.
Also, 2.5 is definitely a time that they test all boundaries, and for a couple weeks there, I thought my son was going to give up his nap, but we kept putting him down for it, and making him rest, and he is now back to his schedule.
Just keep doing what you're doing. Right now, she's getting up because she can but it won't last forever. Remember to be consistent- don't let her snuggle in or she'll never get out!
I agree with you about not locking her in the room, but you could put a baby gate across the door at night so that she can't get out without an adult.
> Should I just say screw it and not worry so much about this?
What is the worrying doing anyway? How does it help?
As far as your daughter's sleep, is she acting like she is sleep deprived? My son didn't sleep as much as he was "supposed to" but he acted well rested, so I let it go.
> I have a problem letting go and accepting when things don't go my way!
In all kindness, I would work on this more than the nap part. Kids can be done with naps at 3 yrs old, and the ability to let go of things that aren't important will serve you for decades to come. When you look back on their childhood, what do you want to remember, you worrying? you not letting go? or you enjoying their childhood?
I agree with the other mamas--you're doing the right thing by walking her straight back to bed at night. As far as naps go--some kids drop their naps earlier than others. You might just try "rest time" and tell her that she needs to stay in her room until you tell her she can come out. That you hope she naps, but if she doesn't feel like it, then she needs to have quiet time looking at books and laying in bed. I also think the baby gate is a great idea. For the days she doesn't actually nap, I'd get her to bed earlier. And maybe dropping her nap and getting to bed earlier would decrease the number of times she'll get up at night. She'll most likely be too tired and fall to sleep quicker and with less struggle. Good luck!! Have fun at your husband's Christmas party!
Your night time route is exactly what I would suggest, and I would advise the same thing for nap time. I know it is hard with two but park the 13 month old some where safe so you can take big sister back to bed. She will get the hang of it, she is just testing her limits but just be consistant. As for tonight, just treat it as a fun night, don't worry that she will be up so late. If she gets tired enough she will crash out anywhere. Just let your in laws know about her nap from today when you drop her off. I'm sure she will have tons of fun playing with Grandma and Grandpa. Have a great evening out.
Hi, J.:
Are you worried about how the children will sleep at the grandparent's house?
or Are you worried about how the children will sleep at your house?
I am confused about what you are asking for?
You already stated what you think the problem is but what do you need from me?
Just want to know.
D.
I think you are doing everything right. I absolutely would not impose a 'consequence' for coming to your room. You want her to come if she is hurt, sick, has a nightmare and is scared, smells fire, etc. Rest or quiet time is a great idea if some days she does not nap.
D.
Don't sweat the night she'll be off schedule with in laws.
In general, don't leave it up to her how many times she gets up. Our kids got one walk back to bed and a warning that the next time would be a consequence. They knew it was true by that age, so they stayed in bed from the start. You're not giving her any reason to stop doing this. Explain what will happen, make it firm, and follow through if you need to (if she still gets up-which she will at first not knowing you're serious). She'll soon learn not to get out of bed.
I wouldn't sweat the naps. She may drop that. But be sure she knows she's not allowed to get out of bed at night.
