Help!!! I Have a Sneaky Kid!

I was going through this about a month ago with my 4 year old. Now every time I catch him I tell him (very matter of factly) that he has a choice to make here. He could go ahead and eat the ice cream in witch case I would throw away whatever he did not eat and not buy any more for 4 weeks (1 week for each year of age), or he could put the ice cream away and be able to eat some after he finishes his dinner. My son chose to eat the ice cream the first time but after a month of no ice cream and me reminding him why there was no ice cream in the house, he stopped trying to sneak it.
I beleive that one of the best things we can teach our children is patience and this is just one of the many ways to do that.
I hope this helps!
H. Stanley

They have refrigerator locks for that very reason. You have snacks for your kids LOCK them in a cupboard. He can only have a treat after he eats all his lunch/dinner...PERIOD! Be consistent...if they need snacks during the day, try fruit, roll ups (make sure they are all natural) cut the sugar. Your son needs to believe you. Next time he gets the ice cream out w/o your permission, he can't have any for 2 days! Show him there's consequences for bad behavior. Just because you want something doesn't mean you get it....life lessons.

He's five. Oh you could have so much fun with this one. Get colorful 3x5 cards and glue big googly eyes on them and write "I can still see you!" or something cute on them and stick one right on top of the ice cream. If he can read put a cost on it like "Sneaking this icecream will cost you folding 2 loads of laundry" or something clever like that. Put them on anything he tries to sneak. OR! better yet, empty the carton of ice cream into some other non see through container and put the empty ice cream carton in the freezer with the eyeball card inside that says "I'm just as sneaky as you!"

You could also start "sneaking" things of his. Like his favorite toy. Sneak it out of his room and go play with it in your room. When he finds you try to hide it from him.

OH This is a good one too.... Sneak something really bad into his dinner... like his least favorite vegetable or something, or put too much salt or something. Then when he realizes what you've done say to him, "So you would prefer that I am upfront about things with you instead of sneaking around behind your back? Me too!"

The more creative and fun the lesson is the longer he'll remember it. And the more fun you'll have teaching it!

I would remove the ice cream, fill his belly with food...he must be hungry and warn him that the next time he asks a favor of me I am not going to do it.and then I don't no matter what it is...and that can become really interesting ... as You can't predict what it might be that they need your help with.Iie: wiping a butt, assembling a toy, finding a shoe, calling a friend, home work, cutting a steak..

I do however give them a way out so they can have the favor from me, I will trade for another amends type chore from them. Like empty the diaper bin, organize all the shoes, clean the foyer mirror, brush the dog ect ect. I do this with kids as young as two ( as long as they can talk) and as long as the cunning is something along the lines of lying , stealing or being covertly mean to another.

Boy my kids really hate that... and for the next long while...they don't mess with me.

How ever if my kids ( I have five) want sweets, I usually allow it, once they have eaten a protein/ vitamin filled meal or large snack..which they dutyfully will eat because I have handed them the responsibility to nourish their bodies.. and everyone wants to become tall, strong and fast Right?

In the end, they actually eat very little of the sweet,,,as they are now too full. besides If I bought it in the first place it must mean I was okay with them eating it .right?

Love H.

Discovering sneakiness is something a lot of kids go through, I think. The thing to focus on though is whether they get stuck there or not.

Somethings that have helped our family is that my kids and I have talks occasionally on "feeling identification." We go over terminology and associating feelings as peaceful ones or not. Sneakiness eats away at their peace. They can't have long term happiness. They loose their ability to perceive if others are lying to them. A pure heart can discern a lot that a clouded or darkened one cannot.

Ironically, my 5 year old son loves ice cream too and we just recently went through this exact same thing. The motivation that has worked best for him is the one that helps him realize there is a conscience inside him and it is effected by his choices. He also has to pay for the price of the pillaged item as restitution from the chores he does.

There are a lot of good things you can do. I hope you are able to find something that works for you and your son! He is probably ready and will be eager to see how he can start earning money to save up for the things he wants. Kids like to master positive power!