Help! I Can't Nurse Anymore.

He is plenty old enough to ween, just help him find other ways to comfort. He may be mad at first, but he is old enough to understand the word no now, so just tell him no, that mommy's boobs no longer work and big boys drink milk from a cup.

you've made it this long breat feeding CONGRATULATIONS!! i only went 4 months cause i had to go back to work. my daughter didn't have a hard time in the transition from breast to formula milk, but that was the only choice she had, cause i was done, and dried up FAST after i decided enough (plus i wasn't pumping in the girls bathroom at walmart to relieve myself either GROSS!! so i had more modivation to quit than continue.

at 20 months, he can definitely be weaned off! To make yourself feel better, just remind yourself that you gave him TWENTY MONTHS worth of breast milk. congratulations on making it that long! You can remind your husband that 12 months is the "normal" weaning age... maybe clamp some clothespins on HIS nipples for about 20 minutes, then see if he still wants to tell you what you need to do! lol. I'm sorry that I can't give you any weaning tips though, since my DD is only 6 1/2 months old and no where near ready to wean. lol. The only thing I can think of would be to try pumping and giving that to him in a sippy cup?

He is probably feeding so much because since he got sick it has become more of a comfort thing than a hungry thing. Try if you are willing to give him bottles of milk instead. And up his regular food amount. Nursing takes a big toll on your body, and men just dont understand, you do what you feel you need to. Like you said its your body and you have to deal with it.

I recently weaned my son at 22 months. I'm pregnant and nursing became VERY uncomfortable for me. I was worried that it was going to be a traumatic experience for both of us, but to my surprise it was pretty easy. I almost always nursed him in the same chair so, for starters, I stopped sitting in that chair for any reason. I hid the boppy pillow so that he couldn't bring it to me and escort me to "our" chair! Then when he would beg me to sit down in that chair I would suggest other things we could do together. Like play outside or I would push him on his airplane. Something that he really liked doing, but didn't get to do too often. He won't drink cows milk so that wasn't an option for me. The first few days were a little difficult, but it actually went pretty smoothly. He was a comfort nurser and he still need some part of me for comfort. He now uses my arm as his comfort. He will hug it and rub his face on it and even snuggle up with it when he's sleepy. Sounds kinda weird, but it really isn't!!

first of all, get this idea out of your head that you are his servant. you are his mother!!!! being a mother IS to serve someone else other than yourself, but that doesnt mean you are his servant; you are his mother and you are bound by nature to fulfill the needs of your child!

that being said, theres nothing wrong with wanting your body back. im AMAZED and THRILLED that you have such a supportive husband. that is amazing, most women dont have that, so feel VERY lucky here.

i would just take it day by day. dont ask him to nurse, and dont refuse him when he asks. rearrange the furnature or whatever to maybe minimize the familiarity of a place you normally sit to nurse, and distract him as much as possible during the normal times when he wants to nurse. ALWAYS replace a nursing session with a bonding activity. only focus on dropping one session at a time.

if your nipples are sore, perhaps hes not latching right? make sure hes getting enough of the breast into his mouth, not just the nipple, but much of the colored part should be in as well. its easy to get sloppy with a more active older nurser!!

other than that, i want to congratulate you and thank you for breastfeeding this long! :) :) you are an amazing mom!!! :)

You need to wean, not just stop cold turkey. It's not fair to your toddler who is just too young to understand why you are suddenly taking his comfort away for no reason at all.

Start by taking sessions away and replacing them with sippy cups of water, juice, or water...or a snack or activity. Once you take a session away, do not give it back. Yes, you can start making excuses by saying, "Mommy's milk is sleeping..." whatever comes to mind. Stop wearing shirts that make your breasts easy to get at and begin making new routines to make up for the sessions you take a way. Think of this as a distraction for your son. Usually the first thing in the morning and last day sessions are the last ones to eliminate. Begin by taking all the other sessions in between away. Good luck.

I also started weaning my son around 20 months. We took it slow and he was completely weaned by 24 months. One thing I found really helpful was to change some of the routines we had fallen into. For example, at naptime we would read a book and then nurse. I changed that so after reading, instead of nursing, I would sing him a couple songs. I also changed the location where we did the naptime routine. So, instead of sitting together and reading/nursing in the rocker, he would just sit on my lap on the floor. By changing some of the routines, he seemed more likely to forget to ask to nurse. If he asked during the day, I'd also try to distract him with something that he really liked to do. I'd say something like 'Do you want to read a story?' or 'Do you want to play with your trains?' He'd forget all about nursing because he got excited about the fun thing we were going to do together. Hope this helps give you some ideas! Don't feel guilty about weaning your son. You have done a great job in continuing for so long and if it is no longer working for you, then it's totally fine to begin weaning.

BFing for 20 months is an amazing feat. You get a big gold star! =)

Give yourself a pat on the back and feel no guilt if you decide to start down the weaning path.

Ever thought your baby might be trying to tell you something by pushing so fiercely at the BFing limits? He might actually be saying he is ready for a change too.

That is totally an appropriate reason to wean, especially at 20 months. You should feel very good about what you were able to give him. I weaned my youngest at almost 30 months (the only reason we went so long is I was hoping to be pregnant--which normally makes me hormonally anxious--and breastfeeding makes me VERY calm) because after trying for 8 months we still weren't pregnant. (I got pregnant the month we were completely done.) I thought he would be traumatized...I thought it would be horrible...I thought he would freak because he got weaned to make way for Baby...none of which happened. He was nursing 4-5 times a day at Christmas, we cut him down to morning, night and before nap in December, morning and night in January, night in February, and in March, we were done (we cut back every time I got my period). Now I'm 8 months along and he thinks nursing is for babies. He still LOVES my boobs, but I'm ok with that. I nursed my first for 13 months, and I can't even tell you how good it feels to be 100% in possession of your own body! Even though I'm planning to breastfeed #3, I'm ALREADY eagerly looking forward to being done with babies and nursing--even at the same time that I'm looking forward to meeting my baby!! If you're ready to be done, it's ok.

Every time you feel bad... think of my son :) And others like me who wanted to nurse and either couldn't at all... or like myself in particular... got infections / had to go in for surgery / chemo / take meds / died / got deployed ... and our kids weren't as lucky as to get a full 20 months. Some didn't get any time at all, some only had a few months. Your son has gotten TWENTY! That rocks.

OR think about how much money you've saved! My son was a huge eater... when I had to stop nursing at 9ish mo I had to spend over $20 a day on formula for over 4 months... and then $10 a day on formula for the next year. $2400 for 4 months, $3650 for the next 12 (apx). If I could have kept nursing for 20mo... it would have saved me about $6,000.

I don't have weaning tricks for you, because we didn't have a choice. It was "Dang! Right now??? Okay, we'll make this work."

Wait to wean him until he's feeling better. He's nursing a lot because he's sick and this is what he knows will comfort him - not to mention the incredible antibodies your milk contains. I just had to wean my 25 month old DD and it was sad (for me!), but I'm 7 months pregnant and I knew that tandem nursing wouldn't work for us. What I did might sound a little harsh but it was actually a gentle way to wean in the long run. I told my DD often one day that "Mommy's babas are All Gone" while shrugging my shoulders (our sign for all gone). Then when I went to put her down for her nap, I put a little bit of apple cider vinegar on both nipples. We sat down in the nursing rocker and I gave her a sippy cup of milk and said "babas are all gone." I let her lift my shirt and then she could smell the vinegar and looked at me and I repeated "all gone." She tasted them a little bit and then drank her sippy cup. She asked a couple of times the next day, but was not upset, and by the third day she was saying "babas all gone" and shrugging her shoulders.

I actually was more sad to have to wean than she was :) She only nursed twice a day except when she was sick and then would do the same marathon sessions as your son. But that made me really glad to be a SAHM. If I could of, I would have let her self-wean (or until 3 years), but that's just me.

You've done 20 months, that's awesome! Just stop. Tell him the boobs are broke (in his language of course). Take him to the store and let him pick out some new sippy cups..... and that's all he gets from now on. He'll be fine in just a few days.
Congrats on the 20 mos. You will miss it tho on occasion.... :)

You can either just quit, or you can wean him down to once or twice a day. You've done awesome breastfeeding for so long. I tend to nurse for two years so if that's what you're wanting, then go for it. Just cut it down to bed time only or something like that.

I agree that you get a big gold star for BFing for 20 months! If you are ready to stop, then I suggest cutting out one session a week, ending with the night session. Find other ways to comfort him, if that's why he's recently nursing more. Once you cut off a session, don't let him have it back! Even if you wanted to try to make it to 24 months, you could only BF before bed.

(and just to clarify, it's now recommended to BF to at least 24 months, not 12. "The World Health Organization emphasizes the importance of nursing up to two years of age or beyond (WHO 1993, WHO 2002)." -- http://www.kellymom.com/bf/bfextended/ebf-benefits.html#l...)

***I'm not trying to discourage you from stopping if that's what you want (I think it's best for you and your LO if you are ready to wean now, so please don't feel this is to make you feel guilty...you should be *proud* for nursing for 20 months!!!!). I'm just trying to clarify what is recommended.

I know it's hard but he doesn't need you anymore. It just is a habit and a comfort. Mommy I don't feel good it makes me feel so calm when I nurse give it to me. My 18 month old has for the most part self weened...I am so blessed I know but he really struggled to lose the daytime nap nursing. As hard as it was I had to just lay him on the floor when he was ready to crash and let him cry. All he would do is paw at me and pull my shirt up or try to pop out my breasts to help himself. Cover up as much as you can. I was wearing nursing tank tops to self service was easy. Now it's cold out so I have layers which makes the temptation less. He'll cry and you'll want to give in because you know how to stop his misery but he'll get the idea in a couple days. My son still cries at nap and still pulls on my shirt but he's out in 5 minutes if I lay him down. We are now down to once a day. We nurse between dinner and bedtime. Offer lots of water or milk when he would otherwise nurse. Offer a snack shortly before he would want to nurse. My trick was just to keep him as full as possible since he tends to prefer my milk because it's the quick easy right there snack. If I'd give in he'd nurse multiple times a day. I love nursing and don't really mind most of the time. I have days where I feel like you. My biggest reason is I'm beginning to plan my next pregnancy so It would be ideal to not be nursing then. I know I can but if I'm not feeling well the last thing I want is to let him cling on my tender breasts. Hope this helps. Whenever possible have daddy take him. That's how we cut the night time nursings. Daddy had to go get him. When daddy was out of town mommy would go snuggle but would roll onto her belly so he couldn't access the goods.

Oh as I read other responses yes bonding activities are great. If he will let me hold him when he throws his I want it so bad momma fit he will often be content to hold my breast. Sounds wierd yes but he is so used to snuggling against them to nurse it just makes him feel better. He will often crawl up on my lap reach in and just be happy there with his sippy in the other hand.