Help Daughter Scared to Sleep in Her Room!!!!

My kids - 13, 10, 6 - all went through that stage, and the youngest still does on occasion. He's even scared to use the bathroom with the door closed, but only when he is in that "scared" phase. It last a week or 2. Then he's perfectly fine for several months, then it hits again. This is a normal part of development. They begin to recognize between 4-6 that they are mortal, and that bad things happen. Then their creative little brains take that to the extreme. Just find something that works for you. I find that if we have a particularly bad night, and I have taken him back to his room several times, it is ok to let him sleep on our floor or in our bed. The next night he must sleep in his own bed, so it doesn't become a habit.

i know this may sound really strnge but i have to put it out there for you. my daughter still does this and she is 6 and has been since about the same age as yours. around the time i was prgnant with her some developers found an indian burial ground about a block away from my moms house. from the time keera could walk she has "seen" things at my moms. a little boy. to the point of hyperventilation. weird i know. even at home she refuses to keep her door closed. i think it is fear that she is keeping something in. dad and i have seen something come out of her room and go towards our sons room at night to. something so solid we thought it was the dog or one of the kids. never any of them. anyway, i guess i'm trying to suggest that she may be sensitive. my step daughter was killed in november and since then it has gotten worse. keera barely sleeps, and talks alot in her sleep to the unknown. i don't mean to scare you or anything but kids are more open to things like that than we are. i hate the night light thing but try that and cracking her door if she sleeps with it closed. best of luck

We had this problem with our son, until I bought him a fish tank for his room. He loves fish, and was thrilled to have his very own aquarium, with fish he picked out himself. Plus, the light is on at night, which acts like a night light (only brighter), and the water pump kind of acts like a soothing white noise.

I hope this helps!

To ad to what another mom suggested, we used the small spray bottle with water; however, we also added a scent (a body spray that I use often and he was familiar with, or daddy's aftershave). That way he could smell the spray while he drifted off to sleep. He would spray the room with some help when needed.

We also got him a batter operated lantern (child sized) and put that in the same spot near his bed every night, so that if he is frightened he can turn that on to either guide him to our room or to the bathroom if necessary.

My son is just 4, and is beginning to outgrow it. But he started at around the same age as your daughter. He recently told me that he gets lonely in his room at night, and sometimes he just wants someone to be there with him... lonesome I guess.

When he is really frightened, to calm him down more quickly, and to not interrupt my sleep (I typically am up during the school year at 5 am to get ready for work), I will allow him in our bed. Probably not the best choice, but it works for us. He's soothed when he really needs it, he feels safe, and although interrupted, my sleep is smoother. I have a 45 minute drive to work, and being tired on that drive home is something I'd like to avoid.

Good luck!

This happened to us when our daughter (now 4.5) was nearly the exact same age. I assume your daughter was a good sleeper before this (I promise she will be again- she just has to work through it. Does she have a new room? new bed?)

If our daughter couldn't verbalize what was bothering her when we put her down, we just checked her room thoroughly, reassured her there was nothing there that wasn't there in the daytime - We even made a little song "it's the same-old window, same-old door, same-old lamp, same-old floor, etc.)

When she got up after her initial bedtime, we put her back to bed silently and firmly each time she got up. Zero conversation. We did have to start taking away privleges, bike-riding, tv shows, etc. to discourage it. (I was 8 mos. pregnant at the time and the getting up over and over was not fun.) I just think this is the age when they start to develop fears of the dark, bugs, sounds, etc. and there's no explaining it away, they just have to get through it. My daughter still sleeps great. Doesn't get up for anything- thunder, lightning, nothing.

Good luck!

I think this is pretty normal at this age. My daughter has been afraid to go to the bathroom alone, walk into the next room alone. Forget about sleeping alone.

They'll grow out of it. Maybe let her sleep on floor of your room for a while. I believe it respecting my kid's feelings. If she's scared- comfort her. She'll get through it in time.

Hi Jennifer!
I think you were reading my mind! I know that is not what you want to hear but I am having the same problems with my daughter. I hope all the Moms out there will have some helpful advice for us both. Good Luck and thanks for the question!

We have a small plastic spray bottle filled with water that I told her is monster spray. We sprayed her room, under the bed, etc until she was satisfied her room was safe. We kept the bottle on her night table, just in case she needs it. It helped a great deal. Good luck to you. I think they all go through this phase.