Help--my Son Is So WHINY!!!

1. Don't respond so fast. Let him get REALLY furious and then quiet - yes, it really does happen. Then go in. It is physically painful (for you) at first, but it gets better quick - less than two weeks.

I had several people tell me that this is because the child loses hope of rescue - but whatever, it worked.

2. Don't nurse immediately. Give physical presence and a cup of water (not juice). Finish whatever it is you were doing in the next five minutes, then give a snack still with water. Then nurse.

3. Nogreaterjoy.org

And I really do have two of the happiest kids on the block.

S.

I wish I could give you advice or tell you what to do but I really can't. The most I can say is that my daughter went through the exact same thing. My family couldn't hold her or anything because she was so attached to me. I really think it's just a stage. I'll over you some hope by saying that it gets better from here because my daughter is now 20 months old and she probably passed that stage around 15 months. Once she learned to use her "big girl words" and tell me what she wanted like "up" or "eat" or "drink" it gets much better. It's really great when they can understand your questions and orders and tell you "yes" and "no". I think he'll probably pass through it. It's the curse of nursing babies who stay at home with mommy like mine did! haha! Just hold in there, nobody will blame you for being a little impatient sometimes. We've all been through it! Just keep your head up and know there are better days to come! Pray for patience and understanding! It will help. God bless!

I would cut out one of the naps, or at least shorten one of them so he gets more sleep at night.

In the mornings, have some board books or safe age appropriate toys in his crib that he can wake up to and play with for a while. He may hate it at first and throw everything out, but he will get use to them.

I have a 3 year old and a 1 year old as well. For me, I try to nurse when he is calm and wanting it, instead of when he is screaming and demanding it because I am trying to wean him. It is helping so far, try giving your son the meal first or even just a graham cracker to get him to chew on something before nursing.

If you can offer other comfort techniques instead of nursing, like trying to cuddle him and read a book, or blow bubbles, put on music and swing him to it (even fun dance music can snap him out of it), that may help him calm down, or at least redirect his attention and see you as something other than a constant pacifier. He is at the age where he can learn to entertain himself, maybe with blocks or learning toys and puzzles for his age so he can learn independence.

Also, when you go to the bathroom or eat, put him in his room or play yard for a few minutes so he will be safe and you can take a 5 minute break.

Eventually, he will calm down once he figures out how to entertain himself.

"Happiest Toddler on the Block" has a DVD that is exactly what you need. It is wonderful and TRULY works. The book is confusing for me, but Dr. Karp models the technique in the DVD and it makes perfect sense. No melt downs with either of my kiddos....it works.

Sounds like a pretty normal one year old to me. My second son who is 18 months whines and cries often, too. My first son didn't, but he,also, had a lot more words in his vocabulary by the time he was 18 months. I'm guessing because my second son can't communicate with me easily, then he whines to get his message across. As far as the clingy behavior, it can get to be too much sometimes, but enjoy that he wants to be close to you because he won't for very much longer. He just loves his mom!!

This sometimes happens when they are about to go through a growth spurt or hit another developmental stage. Two other thoughts are: is he getting enough food besides nursing, and is he possibly sleeping too much?

Another thought: are you spending enough time with him outside of feeding and the "mechanics" of baby care? Playing, going on walks, etc...they do go through clingy phases, and it's usually a good idea to just "double up" on the time you spend with them. That way, they see you are there for them, and they can relax and move on into the more independent phase.

Hang in there! And definitely have another one! Every child has a different temperament and personality, and it is fun to see those differences. And it's nice for children to have siblings, for many reasons (although I know there are many happy, well adjusted single children, too). Relax and realize it is a stage and will pass.

You may also want to try baby sign language. Hit the library, and half price books might have something as well. They're at a stage where they can think, but can't communicate their needs - imagine how frustrating that would be for you! Yikes! The sign language actually helps with language development in general, which is great, and should help reduce whininess. Also, if you can get him involved in the process of things that he whines about, that might help.

I haven't really gone to the bathroom by myself except at night since my son was born. This may become a good thing for potty training since he's familiar with the "process". LOL - he'll hand me toilet paper and say "wipe?".

Good luck!