My son is 6 weeks old and during the day he will not sleep unless I am holding him. He will go to sleep fine as long as I am holding him but as soon as i put him down, regardless of where it is, he immediately wakes up and starts crying. He does the same thing if I put him down while he is awake. I can try putting him in his bouncy seat or swing or even on the floor and he will start crying if not immediately then very shortly after putting him down. he usually calms down pretty quickly once i pick him up. I cant get anything done and I feel like I am neglecting my 3 yr old. Anyone have any ideas on what to do?
Well since nothing but holding him works why not buy a snuggly or a sling like carrier you wear and put him in and just carry him. He'll love the snuggle time.
Check out baby wearing.... saved my life!!!!
They won't want to be held forever- hang in there.
yep, baby wearing! he needs to be close to momma! :-)
Bless your heart. Have you tried swaddling the baby? A tight wrap does make them feel more secure. They even make swaddling blankets with velcro now. There are summer weight receiving blankets too. The next time someone says they want to see the baby or do something for you, tell them to come on over and let them hold the baby so you can take a shower.
Check for acid refulx. That would be my first guess since it happens every time you try to put him down. Could be "silent" reflux. And reflux hurts like the devil.
Google 4th trimester. This is where is baby right now. Will give you invaluable tips and tricks to help soothe baby.
Swaddle (part of the 4th trimester tricks) swaddle before you want him to sleep.
Stay very, very close to him while you are trying to lay him down swaddled. Prevents that falling feeling.
Crib wedge (will help if he has some reflux) fits tightly under the sheet and all the way across the top of crib so no worries of his slipping under or between.
Mayawrap saved my life with my high needs preemie. I used it thru baby 2 and it's still like brand new. Goes from newborn to toddler. I can still carry my almost 3 year old on my back in it.
I second Beth's opinion. I like the Woombie and the Miracle Blanket as swaddle blankets.
Secondly, do you have a sling or a wrap? I had one that would NOT be put down for even a minute. Everyone told me to "let her cry it out", but she would cry for HOURS if I put her down. I had a 2 y/o and 5 y/o at the time and my husband was working late hours. I thought I was going to go mental. I couldn't even shower.
Enter my sling. Saved my life. I'd just strap her to my front or back and she'd settle and happily sleep. It wasn't the IDEAL situation, but it was a heck of a lot better than what I'd been dealing with! I did everything with her attached to me; cook, clean, bathe the other children, even defrosted the freezer. ;)
They'll probably tell you it's colic and will go away at some point. I hope it is and does. Mine wasn't colic, though, she just wanted held. Understandable, really. I was all warm and cozy and soothing. :)
Good luck, mama.
Buy a baby carrier/wrap. Something like a moby wrap. I wear my newborns. Some are needier than others. This seems pretty normal to me, though like others have said, you might want to rule out acid reflux. And the idea to make sure you're swaddling him when you lay him down is SUPER important. You especially want his arms wrapped up nice and snug so he feels safe and secure. 15 minutes after he goes to sleep, try laying him down. If you do it too soon, he'll wake up. Don't wait longer than 20 minutes. I used to never be able to lay my babies down until I learned about the 15 minute rule. It's worked great.
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have you checked for acid reflux to see if that is the issue. For my son this was an issue, it was mostly about the angle that he was at when I helpd him.
My daughter is now five months old and generally happy to play on the floor, but I did have to hold her all the time when she was younger. I even had to sleep with her on my chest.
I'm not sure when she started enjoying the toys in her baby gym, but I do know the trick that made it easier for me to put her down when she slept. Someone told me to torn a towel sideways and roll it up. Then I bent it into an upside-down "U" and placed a receiving blanket on top of it. My daughter nuzzled right in to it and was mostly content to sleep, feeling like she had arms around her. She didn't like swaddling, so this arrangement really helped me. Of course, there were still times when I couldn't put her down, but at least she would sleep with the towel around her some. She still sleeps with the towel now; I don't know when I'll try to take it away.
The others have given great suggestions, especially as regards a baby sling or other carrier; I will just chime in with some philosophy. For all of the baby's life until he was born, he was inside you where it was warm, dark, he was snuggled/held, had all his needs met, never was hungry or thirsty, never needed his diaper changed, nor had any uncomfortable thing happen. Then he was born. Not only were there immediately huge changes (bright lights, cold room, big spaces so he could stretch out, lots of strangers), but there was also changes to the one constant of being held. It is comforting to him, and some babies just don't like being away from the one person they know and love best, namely, mommy. Don't be in a huge rush to make him grow up and be by himself; biologically, we are in the "constant and close contact" type of mammals, when you look at biological markers like content of milk (fat, protein, calorie percentage), etc., comparing mammals that keep their babies close to them for most of the day (like monkeys, kangaroos, etc.) vs. mammals that leave their babies for lengthy periods of time (like lions who go out hunting).
You may also want to rule out physical causes. Many people suggested reflux, and while that's possible, it's not the only physical reason babies may fuss. If your baby had a rough birth (for instance, if the doctor applied pressure to his head and neck by pulling him out either with forceps, vacuum, or even just pulling him out by the head during a C-section), these things could hurt his poor little neck and could still be bothering him. If you have a good chiropractor (not a quack) in your area, s/he may be able to help with a few minor adjustments.
There's also the possibility that you're eating something that is bothering him through your breastmilk (if you're nursing), or that the formula (if you're formula-feeding) is upsetting his stomach.
Do you swaddle your baby? If not, give it a try. That way he feels snuggled even when he is laying by himself. We did this for my baby for the first two months or something and it works perfectly =)
Baby bjorn! That is how I survived having a 17 mo old and newborn And this time a newborn, 2.5 yo and almost 4 yo. I just let him nap in it while i cook, play with the kids, etc. Best wishes!
Oh my gosh, I just have to chime in. Someone said "this shouldn't be happening." This is totally NORMAL! Also, this is not your first child so I'm not going to patronize you by assuming you know nothing about childcare. I recently learned that at 6 weeks crying/fussiness peaks and then begins to decrease from there. My first child did not fuss hardly at all, but my daughter did. It was a shock to my husband and I...she cried for hours especially in the early evening (which not only normal, but common for most babies!) What saved me was a baby wrap, the Moby wrap specifically, but there are other brands out there. You used to could only buy the Moby online, but I saw it at Target the other day! You can google it and see videos on how to use the wrap. In "the newborn hold" the baby is basically swaddled against your body. It kept my daugter happy and it was very comfortable for me, in comparison to a Bjorn or sling. And I also used a swaddle blanket for sleeping. She would cry and fight it, but I realized that was only because she was so overstimulated already (keeping in mind ANY slight noise or light can overstimulate a newborn). Anyway, she only napped like 20 minutes at a time at 6 weeks, but I conitnued to swaddle, hold, walk around with her and with each passing week it got much better. By 3 months she was good to go! Good luck, and just remember this time will pass...it may just be a few weeks of colicky fussiness he's going through. BTW, my daughter is now 7 months and is a normal, happy healthy baby!
My son was just like this, and I had to wear him like the others have suggested. I got a cheap front pack, got it from Walmart actually, it was like $20 not too bad, but man that thing saved us. I wore him all day long, and I got everything done. I cleaned with him on me, I vacuumed, and dishes etc.
I even took naps with him in it. He loved it. I would put him in it, and if I wanted a nap, I just laid down, and it was comfortable.
Baby just wants and needs to be close to you right now, and maybe he has separation anxiety when you put him down. Does he have a binky? That always helped too.
Hang in there, it will get better, just try different things until something works for you.
