Have a Week to Get Baby Sleeping

If he did not like the rice cereal in the formula, try making it thinner or thicker or try a different nipple. I had to try several different ones and finally modify them myself to get it so my kids would like it. You might also try giving him thin rice cereal by spoon. They usually grow out of the thrusting reflex with their tongue around this point. Both of my kids slept longer with a little something more substantial in their stomachs, and the second one was not a great sleeper. My husband and I never did the CIO method. It works for a lot of people, but it was just not for us. Good luck!

Ferberize him... CIO is not cruel if it is done correctly. Get the book from the library and follow the method and don't make your husband the "bad guy" for suggesting it.

Your son needs to learn to soothe himself when he wakes at night. Right now you and your boob are serving that function. This is a life-long skill that he will need. You will NOT always be there to physically comfort him. Developing a child who is secure in knowing that you can support him without having to be right next to him will serve him well.

He knows he's loved... he also knows that you will come immediately if he cries. People who are opposed to CIO haven't done the research or the reading. It works.

You know -you can do amended CIO! He's waking up so much because he wants your attention and comfort and he hasn't learned to self-soothe. I was never a fan of complete CIO, but this is what I did with both of my children, and it worked like a charm:

It sounds like the amended Ferber got him going to bed okay! So, when he wakes (and keep in mind -twice a night is perfectly normal at his age), feed him and change him if needed. Do this TWICE per his feeding schedule. Put him back in his crib. Whenever else he gets up and it's not time to eat or he's not dirty, gently talk to him, reassure him and touch him and walk away. When he cries, give it a few minutes. I'm not talking 10 or 15 or 30 -just a few minutes. If he isn't starting to settle, go in, pick him up and hug him and tell him -"It's time to go back to sleep." Put him back down and if he cries -let it go a little longer -up to 5 minutes. If he seriously is not getting calmed down, go in and pick him up again -repeat. I've never had to do this more than 3 times in the beginning. It's okay if he's fussing -leave him alone! He's just getting himself calmed down. Don't go back in there unless he's full-force screaming and it's escalating! It may take a week or so, but things will start changing. Make sure he has a "lovey." This isn't necessarily a stuffed animal. Many companies, especially Carters, make extremely soft loveys with stuffed animal heads and small blanket bodies or else get a really soft and very small stuffed animal -something too small to keep over his face, but that he can touch to help soothe him. It's incredible how soothing babies and toddlers find stroking a soft item to be! He won't grow up with a terrible attachment either. The lovey slowly fades into the background as the toddler years slip by. The loveys have been invaluable with my kids as well! You may have to listen to a little crying. I'm no fan of the ultimate -let the cry themselves to sleep method, but if you want to stop getting up 6 times a night, you're going to have to let him learn to soothe himself.

Another thing I did with both of mine, who are allergy free and completely healthy, is to start putting rice cereal in their bottles around this age. I breast fed my first longer than my second, but you can mix it with breast milk. People freak out over rice cereal now like they do about everything else they overanalyze to death, but it's fine. Every kid and adult I know has been on it, and it does help them sleep. When it comes to parenting, just remember -if you're completely against something or dead set on doing things a certain way, and it's doing nothing but making everyone miserable -maybe it's time to change!

***In response to your update -NO, 5 months isn't too young to teach self-soothing. Babies who suck their thumbs are self-soothing and my youngest has been doing that since birth. It's not that he's "spoiled" but that he is solely relying on you for all comfort and not realizing that he can provide himself with comfort. Right now he has no idea that anything other than you and your breast can be comforting to him -so he needs to find out that other things are comforting and he can access them. If you leave him alone -he WILL discover a lovey, his pacifier, something that makes him feel calm and more like going to sleep. As long as you rush in every time he cries, he will never have the need to seek anything like that out.

Bayley,
Does he use a pacifier? Have you tried one? Maybe that will help. Every child and every parent is different. I had my son sleeping with us until he was a little older and that way we all slept well. At 20 months he was already in his room because I had his brother :) who also slept with us until he was 18 months because I had their sister :) and she slep with us for a little while :) I would let them lay down with me until they fell asleep and then put them in their cribs (which was in my room). When they turn 1 yr. we did the toddler bed in my room and then moved them to their room respectively. I think you soon learn what's best for you and your family and you work with that.
Don't just try to do things that worked for others, but do what works for you.
Enjoy your baby, they grow very quick :)
Blessings

What are you feeding him? Just a breastmilk or formula? If so, how much?

I suggest increasing his amount and adding some rice cereal to at least his night time feeding (not in the formula but actually by spoon). We had to do that w/ my 2 week old (per doctor's orders) because he was taking 8 ounces every two hours and wanted more...couldn't get enough.

Has he been checked for reflux? Even if he's not spitting up he could still be having stomach acid creep up into his throat causing him to wake up. This happened with my daughter, every time I would lay her down she would sleep for 30-40 mintues sometimes less and then wake up screaming. She only slept for long period of times if she was upright or at an angle like in a bouncy seat, swing or carseat. She had silent reflux. We inclined her crib matress and truthfully she slept in her carseat right next to our bed for five months because it was the only thing that worked. Some kids need medication. Mine grew out of it around 6-7 months.

You do NOT have to do ANY version of CIO despite what many people have made you believe. I have never let my children CIO and NEVER will. We prefer to co-sleep. We have the crib "side cared" on our bed. We did this by removing one side of the crib and then attaching it to our bed with bungy cords. My son still has his own space but when he wakes for nursing I can just bring him next to me and nurse without really waking up.

If co-sleeping isn't for you then try room sharing. Just put the crib in YOUR room. Just being close to you will help soothe your child in the night. Also, check into the more gentle sleep "training" (I HATE this word you train a dog NOT a child. You TEACH a child) books. The No Cry Sleep Solution, Happiest Baby on the Block and the Dr. Sears Sleep Book. Dr. Sears also has a web-site. Here is what he has to say about babies and helping them sleep better...

http://www.askdrsears.com/html/7/t070300.asp

I agree..he's waking up because he's been taught he'll get his "reward" if he does. Next week, have hubby get up, hold, sooth & rock him--no feeding (unless it's a time when he *really* is hungry). If he can get him back to sleep without picking him up--even better.
Hubby can nap during the day and you can get some sleep!

My now 7 month old was the same way!!! But around a month ago I decided no more. lol She was sleeping thru the night (8 hrs) until we started giving her food at 3 months.... Then she was up every few hours... Not really to nurse, but just wanting to suck... I'd tuck her in bed with me, latch her on and she'd be asleep in a few minutes.... So one night I decided to be tough... I still tucked her into bed with me, but I gave her a pacifier to suck on... (which she would never accept before)... She was cuddled right with me and conked out.... Slept all night, well, from 2-7am.... :-) Since then we started putting her in her crib and not nursing her to sleep... Nurse her down stairs, then take her upstairs to her crib (light sleeper wakes up when ever moved)... Then she puts herself to sleep with out the pacifier... Yes, there are times she sleeps from 8:30 -7am... There are other nights she wakes at around 1am... And then she falls back to sleep in my bed.

Just keep trying! Something will work... I would not try so hard to have him nap... Perhaps he is OVER sleeping... Try keeping track of exactly how long he's asleep in a 24 hr period......

Well... if you're not for crying it out (me neither, my daughter still wakes in the middle of the night occasionally and she's two. We would have what would be considered awful sleeping habits! But we do what we can- we both work and have to sleep too).

So if you have tried it all under the sun, you might just have a kiddo that needs more attenion which equals you never sleeping.

I'm so sorry I don't have any ideas for you- just support! I know what its like!! catch naps on the weekend, drink lots of coffee, and take turns with your hubby.

GOOD LUCK! :)

Whatever you do, do it consistently. And the environment needs to be the same when he wakes, as it was when he fell asleep, if you want him to go back to sleep. It is a bit disorienting to wake up and discover your pillow has fallen off the bed. Imagine, if you fell asleep in mama's arms and woke up alone in your bed, how disorienting, and even alarming, that would be! So put him down drowsy, but not sound asleep. Even nudge him a bit, so he stirs just a little, when you put him down, so he's aware that he is being put to bed.

We did Ferber. Not quite the traditional CIO, you do go in for visits. I see you know a little about that, but definately buy the book. And do it every time he wakes up not needing a feeding (you already know he doesn't NEED the breast at certain times - he just WANTS it), and for naps, too. It should take about three days, if done consistently. The first day is going to be hard. Day two will be icky, day three will be uncomfortable, and day four will be amazing.

Read it especially for the chapter on sleep cycles. We all naturally wake every hour and a half to three hours (your son's 2.5 is right on track - it takes babies a while to get onto that 90-minute cycle). Adults have the ability to roll over and go back to sleep, usually without even waking completely. Children sometimes cry out before rolling over and going back to sleep. Do you spring up as soon as you hear a noise? Don't. Give him a minute to see if he's fully awake, or just between cycles.

My husband has started using the 90-minute cycle theory on himself. Made it a whole lot easier for him to get up in the mornings, when he figured out that he couldn't set his alarm for 8 hours - 7.5 or 9 is more natural for the sleep cycles!

Hang in there, mama. You'll be all right. (And so will your little one!)

I used Babywise (which I know a lot of people hate, but it worked for us). The main theme is to establish an eat, wake, sleep pattern during the day and it will help him/her sleep through the night.

We started when my DD was 3 weeks old. She didn't start sleeping through the night as quickly as the author said she would but by 4 - 5 months she was sleeping 9-12 hour stretches-- and she was doing that before we started her on rice cereal.

We use CIO (in the beginning I would cry too because it hurt so much to hear her protests.) For naps I let her cry 10 minutes and then pick her up and console her. Then let her cry another 10 minutes, repeat cycle. I never had to do it more the two cycles in the beginning. Now she fusses for about 5 minutes when I put her down and goes to sleep. At bedtime I nurse her until she falls asleep.

I stopped waking her to feed because it never seemed to help. We just fed her at 7:00 and put her down for the night. Whenever she woke up, we would feed her. Slowly she started sleeping longer until she slept all night.

I hope you can find a solution that works for your family. It is tough to be sleep deprived. Good luck to you. : )

I guess I used CIO without knowing it many years ago. Honestly, what you are asking is, how do I get the child to learn to do something without any frustration for him at all? Sometimes, that is not possible. If you know that your son is not hungry, not in pain, and safe, then you are just doing what you will do many times in your life as a parent, which is watch as they learn something that is good for them, even though they don't like learning it very much. If you don't do these things for your kids (letting them learn to self soothe, deal with frustration, be disapointed, lose, or not be the center of the universe) you will be sorry...it is one of the universal parts of being a parent that is the hardest...doing something for the good of your kid that is not so much fun right at the time you do it, and resisting the temptation to intervene for temporary happiness for right now. It only gets bigger and harder from here...

I hope you get some sleep soon.

In the mean time, try the pacifier, try a seat that inclines him, and speak to your doctor about silent reflux if that works. If you have done all that, grit your teeth, and let him learn something he will use every day for the rest of his life...
M.

Either you do CIO--which is not evil like it is made out to be---and get some sleep. Or you choose that the method is not for you and you continue to get up. You can't have your cake and eat it too. The child needs to be soothed to fall asleep. CIO involves teaching him to self-soothe so you don't have to do this 4-6 times a night. If you choose to soothe him yourself then he'll be getting up for as long as you let him. Honestly I think what you are doing now is more cruel because it is confusing. A baby can not understand why you come get him some times at night and not at others. Have you read Weissbluth's book? It is about sleep training, is very effective, and in no way is it cruel. You are not talking about leaving your child to scream him head off for hours. I don't really see how there is another option for sleep training besides sleep training. The other option is not sleep training. This is even more obvious after you did a half-way type of sleep training and now your son is only sleeping 2-3 hours at a time. Kids, babies, and adults need sleep to grow and function, and more than 2 hours at a time. I think it is cruel that you are not allowing this. Its your choice and your baby. You have to do what you can live with.