so i have to preface this by saying i am NOT in a hurry to take my child's lovey (flannel receiving blanket) away from him. by no means! my son is 29 months. he does suck his thumb with it at naptime/bedtime, or if he's really upset which doesn't happen on a normal day. actually i can't really remember the last time he needed it except when getting ready to sleep. i think the sitter kind of discourages it during normal playtime, so he has gotten out of the habit of carrying it around with him all the time. anyway, the other night before bed, he says to me, "mommy i too big for my blanket." we had a pretty long conversation about it (for a two year old!) and he seemed convinced he was too big for it, and didn't want it. i was kind of skeptical, thinking he was just repeating something he'd heard someone say, so i put it at the foot of his bed that night just in case. sure enough, he has continued since then as if we never had the conversation. but i was wondering, is there an average age for giving this sort of thing up? i mean, without divorce, moving, new siblings, or any other kind of upheaval that can cause a child to hang onto it longer. i know that my childhood was relatively stable, and i didn't quit sucking my thumb until school. but my little brother, my parents divorced when he was young, and he reverted back to it when he was seven or so. of course we all eventually quit, and i'm not worrying about it, just curious. i was okay with him sucking his thumb, and still am, i feel it's a great way to self-soothe, and he's slept through the night since he's discovered it at 6 weeks old. so i'm NOT complaining! :) just wondering about others' experiences with it. thanks in advance, sorry for my rambling!
I didnt have a blankie, but I slept with the same stuffed animal until I moved in with my husband and now he "lives" on my dresser. I would just not make a big deal out of it and let him do his thing. :-)
Carrie, my youngest is 10, and still sleeps with his. In fact, the one that he had since he was a baby finally shredded up in the washer, so of course I had to save it in a zip lock bag for him, but now he uses another one from his baby days. He just wants to hug it when he goes to sleep, and thats OK with me. I wouldn't worry about it. Believe me there are worse things you'll have to deal with later on so a blankey is a great comforter at times.
I don't know, but I don't think there's really a typical age for giving up blankies. I do know that my 35 year-old sister and I, both stable, well-adjusted women who come from a stable family, both have our blankies still. It's not like we still suck our thumbs, but we do have them (I keep mine tucked under my pillow). It's neat to know that we've always had them, and I think my daughter likes knowing that, and knowing that if she wants to, she can keep hers forever too. And on a lighter note, I think that if more grown-ups had them and were able to carry them, we'd have lower stress levels! Imagine- a blankie on one's lap might prevent a lot of road rage!
Carrie,
If your son is ready to give it up, then let him. Believe me, it'll be a lot easier to do it now rather than wait until he's older.
My son never sucked his thumb, but took to a pacifier. When he was about 10 months, we thought we'd better start getting serious about breaking him of it. We tried various methods of doing so. At about one year old, whenever I would check on him at night, I noticed that I would find it under his bed. I would put it back in bed with him and in the morning there it would be on the floor again. I took the hint and stopped giving it to him all together. He's never wanted it again and has never missed it.
As far as your son is concerned, I understand you not wanting to give up "his" blankie. :) You can store it and give it back to him much later in life. If you quilt or know someone who does, his blankie can be sewn into it and then given to him when he has children.
Just a thought... ls
Some people never grow out of it. My hubby still has to have a "blankie" when he is not feeling good, the "blankie" is just a little bigger now is all. LOL My oldest is 3 1/2 and she is still very attached to her blanket. She is also too big for her blanket but she doesn't care. I think as long as he is not carrying it everywhere he goes, there is absolutely nothing wrong with him having a favorite blanket for as long as he wants one. You might ask him if you is ready for a new blanket and let him pick one out but don't be surprised if he still hangs on to that old flannel one.
Carrie,
Every child is different. My four year old has a favorite blanket that she likes to have at nap time and bed time. She also curls up under it when she watched movies at home on the sofa. We have to pack it and her little satin pillow anytime she spends the night at Grandmas or her cousins home. She has never taken it to daycare. If the blanket happens to be in the laundry she will go to sleep with out it, but she always wakes up and asks it it is dry yet.
I have a friend who's daughter is almost 7 and she still is attached to a ratty old blanket. It was a pink knit receiving blanket that has slowly become beige and has unraveled until it is now about 8 inches square. She still carries is around at home and on the weekends. I think her parents are waiting for it to completely unravel rather than force her to give it up.
I think every kid has something that they like to keep around that helps them feel safe. My nephew doesn't go anywhere without a dinosaur in his pocket. It sounds like your son has moved on and the blanket has served its purpose for him. However, I wouldn't be surprised if from time to time he still wants it for the next year or so.
J. N.
Carrie I slept with my blankie until 5th grade...even putting it in the bottom of my sleeping bag for sleep overs. Now my pacifier I ended up relinquishing due to peer pressure. I was at an ice skating rink and sitting on a bench with my grandmother (with the pacifier in my mouth) when a little boy sat down next to meand said, "You don't still use a pacifier do you?" And of course I pulled it out said nope and never used it again.
He may be receiving pressure from somewhere else to give it up. I think it's great that you still give him the option and let him know it's ok to use it...but frankly, a lot of kids are just in a hurry to grow up. My son quickly gave up his binkies because he was the big brother (17 mos older than daughter) and big brothers didn't use binkies...but my daughter refuse to relinquish hers until she was nearly 4 and we were hiding them right and left and HAD to take them away because they were affecting her teeth.
I would find a nice memory box (the acid free kind) wash it up and put it in there with some of his drawings, lock of baby hair, etc. so that he will have a nice look back when he's older. My daddy kept my blankie (unbeknownst to me) and it was really nice to unwrap it for X-mas and pull it out at 25. It was like seeing an old friend. I was quite touched that he took the time to save something that was so much a part of my younger life.
Hi Carrie!
My sister is 31 and still sleeps with her baby blanket.....I mean yes she gets a lot of greif for it, more like us just down right making fun of her weirdness. She doesnt care, she loves it and thinks its funny that it bothers us. We had a very normal life, she is married and has 2 babies. So I dont think there is necessarily a tramatic experience that causes a child (or a 30 year old!) to hang on to things. Every kids is different, just becaue you had a rough experience doesnt mean your little man will. I know how you feel though, there were things I was so afraid of when I was a kid and the fact that it doesnt bother my daughter is beyond me. But I have to remember, that was ME not her. I sucked my thumb until I was like 10 and my daughter never wanted anything to do with it. But I had a pretty hefty orthodontic bill! Ok hope some of this helps or even makes sense! Sorry about my rambling! ;)
Hi Carrie,
As far as the thumb sucking I am not to sure on. Neither one of my kids did it. But the blanket I wouldn't worry to much about. Both of my kids are attached to one.My daughter is just about 7 and she still has one.They even use then in kindergarten still at naptime. It is just a security thing and it makes them feel safe.I wouldn't worry to much about it.I hope this makes you feel better.
