Giving up Paci in Almost 3 Yo?

The best thing you can do is just take it away. Like at night when she is sleeping and/or not using, not even thinking about her paci. Just pick it up and through it away, she will scream, it will be hard for all of you, but for her teeth health it will be the best thing you can do. I had to do that with my daughter, she loved that paci, you would think she couldnt live without it, now my boys want nothing to do with it, so I didnt have to break them. But thats what my daughter's doctor told me to do with her, just take it and throw it away.

My parents helped mine disintegrate when I was little. They would cut pieces off and tell me that when the pacifiers had fallen apart, they would go in the trash. The just helped the process a bit. Apparently it worked because they became less and less satisfying to suck as they fell apart. Good luck!

When you're ready to give rid of the paci's for good, I am a fan of the paci fairy method. I used it for my daughter shortly after she turned 3. She decorated a cute little box and we talked for a couple of days about the paci fairy coming to take her paci's to a little baby that needs them. She liked the idea, and really felt a part of the process. Then, one afternoon, together we put all her paci's in the box and left it out on her bed for the fairy to come and get while we were at the park. When we got back home, there was a soft baby doll on her bed to comfort her to sleep. The first 2 nights were hard and I had to hold her hand until she fell asleep, but after that it was no big deal. I have found that with things like this, the anticipation for mom's is usually worse than it ends up being. Good luck!

My advice is quit giving it to her when she "needs it". If she is asking for it tell her no...you are the mom. If you do not want to go cold turkey set the rule that she can only have it at nap times or at bed time. And stick to that. Get rid of all extra ones and let her wear out the one. Plus talk up being a big girl and how big girls don't use them. One of the daycares I worked at we had a 5 year old still using it - and it was because his mom would give it to him when he asked. All day long he would go with out it but the minute he saw his mom...it was in need my paci and she would give it. If she uses it when she is nervous find something to replace it...but find what will work and stick to it! My son took a pacifier and it was affecting his speech so we quit that at a year. And we did the slow procedure...getting rid of all but one. Hope it works out.

I guess I'm the only one so far (and maybe at all) with a different perspective on the pacifier...my 3 year old still has hers. We don't let her talk with it in her mouth, and we have gotten it down to car rides, nap time and bed time or quiet time she carries them around and plays with them sometimes still, but she doesn't take them to friends or to preschool. She gets it in the store if it is close to nap time (especially if it's sams club I put a blanket in the bottom of the cart and she takes a nap while I shop.) I did at one point decide so many people were so negative about it maybe I should try the whole poke a hole thing, she just chewed on it and then there were pieces of it hanging off and she still wanted it. it isn't like she is going to go to kindergarten with it, and the whole tooth thing isn't an issue with the orthopedic pacifiers now either. I figure when she is ready she will let go. usually she falls asleep with it and then spits it out and doesn't even use it all night anymore. sometimes recently she falls asleep for naps without it too. I just think it will be a natural process and that there is no reason to fight it. If you want to get rid of it fine, work on a process but don't let other people make the decision for you, I think as mom's we have instincts about our kids and their needs. I will stand up to anyone who tells me I'm a bad mom for letting my dds still have her pacifier.
There was a dr. phil a few years ago about the same thing and his advice was to let her grow out of it in a natural stage of maturing and progression. some kids have a stuffed animal and society doesn't say take that away from the kid! how dare you let them get comfort from the bunny!! I'll probably get a lot of moms in arms about this one but really I think it is up to the mom and your kid on what you decide is best. In my situation, my dd still has her pacifier, and I know when she is ready she will let it go, it's already happening on its own...without a battle.

I was having major problems with my son's binky use; well actually it was more along the lines of a binky addiction!! My friend absolutely raved about the cut method, and all of the psychology behind it. She found it on www.bye-bye-binky.com , which is great that it was also free. We went with it and OMGosh... worked so beautifully for my son with NO tantrums, not even one! Thank you God. Five days later he did not want anything to do with his binky. What a relief it was to all of us to finally be done with those darn binkies. Highly recommended! I am also interested in others experiences.... B.

find something she really really wants and tell her that she needs to throw away her "suckie" to get it. It worked for my daughter she finally got a big girl bike, she is only 2 but she is able to sit on it. She would pick up a baby and say i want this so we would say well you gotta throw away the nuk she would put it down no i dont need it. Finally she saw a commercial with a bike and said ooh i want that so we told her the same thing she looked at us looked at her nuk and walked over to the trash and tossed it. She only asked for it for a few days but got over it quickly and now we are nuk free!!!!!!!

Hi L.!

I havent experienced this, but here's an idea that I heard. Get all of her paci's together and tell her that your going to plant a paci tree, so that more can grow. Try to get really excited about it and actually burry all of her pacis and some seeds, so that something will actually. water the seeds daily and have her check on them and watch the seeds sprout.

It takes such a long time for seeds to actually grow into something big, so maybe she'll forget about them. If you have to leave her with one Paci that's okay...just hope she looses it.

Hope it helps, but that's all I got!

He L., I am a grandmother in Pueblo West. I raised four children here in pUeblo. Two of them were addicted to the pacifier until the age of 3. My son would sneak under his sister's crib and take her pacifiers until he had gathered 8 of them. Well, I found a solution. With both the boy and the girl, it worked. One day, I thought to myself - this is enough now so lovingly I approaced the children and said. "You know, I saw some baby birds in the backyard and the mommy bird told me that her babies could sure use those pacifiers. why don't we hang them up in the tree for them..Then we will go to the store and buy a nice gift for you - since you are a big boy/girl now and that will be a thank you toy for being so nice to the little birdies." When we returned, the pacifiers of course were gone (taken away by another family member) and the children were content that they had done something good and they went on to play with their new toy.
I feel this is a positive way to handle it, rather than just taking it away and creating fits and then having to start all over again.
Good luck to you and your little ones.
Grandma Jean

L.,
Hello Denverite! I moved from there (Arvada - Lakewood - Loveland) to rural Arizona and now live in metro Salt Lake. It's a lot like Denver here but even prettier and more family-oriented. I miss home but never want to leave here!

I just plain got sick of the thing so I decided that it was time for my 3-yr-old son to give up his nuk nuk. He'd always been really responsive to the "danger tactic". Nothing weird - read on! For instance, if he didn't want to be buckled in when driving because it was uncomfortable, he would because it was dangerous not to and I loved him too much to let him get hurt. Or don't mess with the fire ants because they bite (he knew about that) or any other bug until I check it out because they might be dangerous/poisonous (we had scorpions and other lovely critters). Or don't chew and talk at the same time because it is dangerous and I loved him too much to want him to choke. He has always liked that I love him too much to want him to put himself in harm's way and I teach him how to take care of himself and he liked being a big boy and taking responsibility for himself - he'd be really proud of himself for pointing out bad bugs, or looking for cars before crossing the parking lot, or telling me to buckle him in. (By the way, I didn't teach him to be afraid of everything, just to respect things like cars and bugs and dogs and understand them - now he wants to make every bug a pet and I have to curb that!)

So with the nuk nuk, I would make a big deal out of throwing one away if it got a hole in it because once it got a hole or tear, it could start to fall apart and get caught in his throat and then he could choke on it and I loved him too much to let that happen. He still had others (we always had a lot). He would bring me one if he saw it had a tear and tell me we had to throw it away because he had the security of others. One day I just said enough and told him we would not be buying any more so as they wore out he would gradually not have any. I don't think he really got what that would mean - it wasn't a reality yet, after all - but I continued to prepare him for it. (I helped a few along once I was ready to give them up.) When we were down to the last one, we talked frequently about how he better start thinking about not having one any longer.

By the way, during this period, I only let him have them to go to sleep. When I helped the last one along with a little cut and he discovered it, he didn't volunteer it but didn't argue when I said that's it. We had a big farewell. He said bye bye and I love you to his nuk nuk, and I told him his nuk nuk loved him too. We put it on a shelf in his room where it could watch over him because it loved him so much. For a couple of days, when he went to sleep at night or for a nap, he repeated all that and told him he missed it but that was it. It was all very cute. Once he got used to it being gone, I stashed it in my dresser so if he brought it up (which he did a couple of times) I could pull it out and show him that nuk nuk was still around in a place that it decided it wanted to make its new home so it could always be here to look after him. He's long since forgotten about it and I threw it away a long time ago. What worked for him was the big send off. He had "buy-in" to the whole process, which is what works with him.

He never cried for it, just at the last couple of nights when he actually had to give it up, he told nuk nuk that he missed it and loved it and I told him that nuk nuk loved him and would miss him too and it knew that cow (his favorite stuffed animal) could handle the job of comforting him from now on.

In case you think this took forever, it didn't. This whole thing only took a couple of weeks from when I decided to get rid of all that were left to when we said bye-bye to the last one. It was all very sweet and quiet.

My son gave up his binkie when he was a little over 2 years old, and while the first 2 weeks were very rough, he doesn't think about it anymore. I replaced his binkie with stuffed animals, and yeah, he cried a lot, but I would remind him he was a big boy and he doesn't need his binkie anymore.

Binkies are so bad for their teeth. If you have her bite down, just look at the gap inbetween her top and bottom teeth in the front. That should scare you into getting the ball rolling. My son's gap is pretty bad now, but we are hoping that he is young enough that they will go back into place as he grows older.

As heart breaking as it is to hear her cry, it is soooo worth it in the end. Good luck!

Not only has it become a habit for her but you as well. She does not need it. Babies have a sucking method that is soothing for them. This should be over with by 18 mos at the latest. She is three. She depends on it. You can get her something else as a comfort, blankie, stuffed friend, but take it away.

It can cause irreversible damage to her teeth within the next year, it causes the upper part of the mouth (the roof) to form a deep pocket, right now if you get it from her it can be fine. The little boy I watched had one until he was two then he wanted this cool car set, his parents said when he threw the pacis away it was his. It was literally that simple. His mom said twice he woke up and asked for it but went right back to sleep when she reminded him. Some kids like to do it themselves but it can be a battle with others.

Take them all up if she is really dependent, throw them away. If she is going to be hysterical, do it when she isn't around. Some don't agree with the sneaky approach but at three she is not very likely to be cooperative. If she looks for them,simply say "all gone". Do not have one in the house for back up as you will cave. She won't be happy, there will be a few bad days, but so worth it.

There is no other way other then to make it a game and see if she will pack them all up herself to send to babies and get a big girl present in exchange. Like the Supernanny method of the paci fairy.
She doesn't need it!! She doesn't need it..keep saying that. It is a bad habit after the age of one. Causes teeth and speech issues. Not worth it.
It won't be easy but the end result far outweighs the bumps.
Promise.

L., I am all about quitting things cold turkey with little ones. I know that she loves it and that it is easy for you too but I think she has learned for it to become her "comfort" habit. So, throw them away, do the party of "giving the "suckies" to the new babies or the "suckie fairy!" and have her leave them in the mailbox and wait to see if the "suckie fairy" brings her a new comfort item like a new dollie, stuff bear, blanket.....

I have also learned that when you do decide to do something like this, it takes more discipline on the parent's part than it usually does on the child so...it may be a hard few days but you CANNOT give in or you have lost all sense of being the parent in control! GOOD LUCK!

My pediatric dentist was very happy we had a paci baby since we didn't have to worry about trying to quit a thumb sucking addiction. Both my kids have great teeth and gave theirs up closer to 3....Now is a great time for her to start the weaning process with a little help from you.

Cut a small hole in the tip of the paci. It will 'break' it and make it not so exciting to suck. Then progressively cut more and more of the paci away eventually she'll decide its no fun and find a way to soothe herself with something other than a paci.

We prepared my son by telling him he was sucking it to much it was going to break then a week later we cut the tips. He was confused and then said "broke" and that was the end. He had a hard time at naps and bedtime (he was 17 mo) but that only lasted about 2 days.
We also did it on a really busy week-end, I'm not sure if that helped by distracting him with family and friends but we think it did.

Good luck!

My little boy was almost 3 when he gave up his "nuk-nuk". we started out by telling him that he could only have it during naps and bedtime. HE was really interested in gum, so we told him when he turned three we had to give them to the babies in Africa (I don't know where this came from...), and then he could have gum. We told him only 3 year old's had gum. He started "practicing' to be three by using his nuk only at naps and bedtime for a bit, then we moved to only naps and taking it away at bedtime because he was tired at the end of the day. He always thought he was "practicing to be 3", so then one day he just said, "I'm ready to have gum." He gave up his nuks. He definitely cried the very first night, but it wasn't bad, and after that - nothing! Good luck. I know how tough this is, and you never know what will work! We've had other friends take their nuks to Build a Bear and put them inside an animal, so they still got to hold them when they slept. We also know kids who put them all in a bag and take them to Toys R' Us and use them as payment for a toy they choose. We also know people who have gotten them to give them up by giving them to friends with new babies. You just never know! Good Luck!!

My 2.5 yr old has a paci. At breakfast, I hold my hand out and ask if she wants to give her binky to mommy or sister. Usually she picks sister. Sister holds out her hand and my toddler spits out the binky. Sister gives it to me. I put it on top of the fridge (in a small bowl) where it stays until bedtime.

Then we eat breakfast.

When she gets hurt, she gets hugs and "I'm sorry" from the person who hurt her...and mommy hugs, too. If she cries for her binky, I say, "No, we're not going to do that now...but I can hold you. Do you want mommy to hold you?"

I do give the binky back for bedtime. and sometimes for naps. It's been about 2 months. I prolly could take it away entirely now. Sometimes she forgets all about it - even at bedtime. She sleeps with her doll now.

She's the type to steal paci's from her little sister....so I haven't taken it away entirely yet.

this might sound bad but my sisters then 3 year old did the samething. She tried everything to get her to get rid of it. One day she got mad at her daughter for having it and she said "honey that can hurt you really bad worse case stop your breathing". Her daughter said why she said because after you turn 3 they really aren't made for big kids. Her daughter ripped it so fast out of her mouth and picked up all of she had upstairs...went back to her mom and said I don't want that to happen. She tossed them all in the trash that day. Might not have been the best thing but it worked and worked fast!

I have also heard that cutting a hole in the end of the pacifier is good. One of my friends also just took the child to the trash can to throw it away and said that the trash man needs it. I just took it away from my son when he was about 2 and said that binkies are for babies and he is a big boy now. I would say that she is addicted to the pacifier and you should get it away from her before it does a lot of damage to her mouth. Once you take it, do not give it back. I saw an episode on Nanny 911 where she took the binkies away from the kids cold turkey and they cried for one night and whined a little the next and eventually went to sleep though and forgot all about them.

I told my daughter when she turned 3, she wouldn't need it anymore, but she was only using it for sleep. This might be harder on a child who uses it all of the time. Anyways, when she turned 3, a couple days after her birthday I told her it was time, and explained to her why until she understood, and she actually made the transition well, but she also has a blanket which I will let her use for as long as she wants. Does your daughter have something else that comforts her. Anyways, this is what worked for me.

I just heard something about this the other day....

Tell her there is a binkie fairy and they need to go around and collect binkies to give to new babies. Ask her if she will put it in the magic fairy box so the fairy can come get it. (decorate a box real cute and put on top of the fridge) The next day have a thank you note and a treat for her....I don't know if you like this fairytale stuff but I thought it was a neat idea. She might want it back but maybe it will teach her to be giving and make sacrifices for others.

This is a big can of worms. But I'll give you my personal opinion that comes from my personal experience. My daughter was 5 when she gave up her binki for good! I talked to many child psychologists over the span of 3 years (when she was 2-5) about it because I was torn and didn't know what to do. This is in a nutshell what I learned.
Let me back up and say I have 13 years experience as a dental hygienist so from the dental perspective it doesn't do permanent damage until permanent teeth start coming in. But boy can it do damage then!
Kids need an alternative way to sooth themselves if it's not the binki. They need to be emotionally ready to replace the soothing of a binki with another way to soothe themselves. My pesiatrician also said what's the rush, no kid goes to kindergarten with a binki. True.
At age 3 we banned the binki to her bedroom ONLY. That worked. Only after she knew we were serious. We'd pretend to flush it down the toilet when it came out of her room (then we'd throw it in the garbage). She'd have one less binki. She knew when she was down to only two she better keep it in the bedroom. So when she was hurt or upset she could go in her room & suck her binki on her bed or when she was going to sleep she could have it. Never any other time.
Then as soon as she turned 5 we started feeling like she could give it up so we talked about it a lot and explalined that no one in kindergarten sucks a binki, it's time to be big etc... and if you go without it for X number of nights you can get a hamster (what she'd been wanting for two years). When going to sleep I would lay with her & tickled her back and sang songs to her. We basically replaced the binki with a nice soothing routine and lots of praise and validation while she was transitioning. She did great and looking back I'm glad we didn't worry about it too much. She grew out of it and gave it up easily when she wanted to and was ready to.

My sister had the same problem with her daughter. She told her that they were yucky and then would cut the nipple off. She will be unset at first but she will get use to the idea with time. The first week will be hard but I bet if you do this she will be paci free in a week! You could also offer a trade for the paci a popsicle or her favorite cookie. Good luck to you.

P.S. my son had one until he was two she will forget all about it.