Hi Mamas!
I know this is short notice, but I just decided I want to do something, but can't figure out what.
I am a foster mom, and one of my "kids" is a high school senior. She is a very special girl and I consider her my daughter. Before she came to stay with me, she had a baby and took care of that baby for several months. For reasons I really can't get into, she had to give her daughter up for adoption. It was the hardest and most selfless thing I have ever witnessed. It has been extremely hard for her, as the love she still has for that child is immeasurable. She did an open adoption and is blessed enough to get to see her little girl once a month.
Her daughter turns one tomorrow. She is making her a cake and got her some gifts. She even bought the adoptive parents a gift (a Willow Creek figurine). This is a very bittersweet occasion for her, and I really think I would like to get her something to commemorate the fact that one year ago tomorrow her life changed forever. I'm just really not sure what to get her.
Do any of you mama's have any ideas? Thank you in advance!
**EDIT**
Thank you all for your suggestions! Keep them coming! :)
Just to add; we gave her a scrapbook for Christmas to put pictures in (I'm a scrapbooking nut!), she has a camera already (but what a great idea!) and she has a book already that is one that a mom writes down a bunch of stuff for her daughter. She's not emotionally ready to give it to her yet.
Thank you guys so much for your help! I am going to go check out Things Remembered in the mall tonight and see what I can find! I will update tomorrow on what we chose.
Thank you all so much for your suggestions! We ended up going to Things Remembered last night and getting her a sterling silver jewelry box, engraved with "A mother's love is infinite" (She always kisses her daughter and whispers that she has infinite love for her before she leaves a visit), along with the baby girl's name and birthdate. The box plays the actual recording of "My Girl" when opened. She absolutely loved it! She was really, really excited to get it and told us it was perfect. She's going to keep little trinkets that remind her of her daughter in there. :)
Reading this brought tears to my eyes.
What about an inexpensive silver band with the date engraved? Her love for her little girl, even through the separation they have experienced, is unending like the circle/band.
What about a pandora bracelet with the little girl charm, or the February birth charm?
What ever you do get she is going to love, seeing you thought of her feelings on this day!
-You don't mention a price range, but what about a simple ring with the baby's birthstone in it or a pendant with the birthstone?
- I really like the idea of the scrapbook and/or digital camera
- something engraved with the baby's first name and date of birth (frame, charm, vase, etc)
Maybe a locket with the little girls picture? a handwritten note telling her how special she is, how proud you are of her? a photo albumn with pictures of her daughter and family?
Tell her she's amazing... and strong. That has to be very hard to go thru.
a charm bracelet with a feb. birthstone
a necklace with a feb. birthstone.
a small photo album
a book that she can write letters to her daughter in ..
I have a few ideas with a variety of budgets in mind.
1. A journal and a few nice pens.
2. A cheap digital camera (there are some great, inexpensive cameras at pawn shops or on craigslist).
3. A photo arrangement (album, framed or scrapbook) with photos from the past few years.
4. Taking her, by herself, out to lunch.
ETA: I have one last idea: I'm not sure if she enjoys arts and crafts (it seems so). I was recently introduced to felting. One of my girlfriends had a second trimester miscarriage. Needless to say, she was a wreck afterwards - physically and emotionally. In order to process, she felted a doll of her baby. It helped her work through her grief and let go. Felting supplies are fairly inexpensive and learning simple.
Alternatively, you could get her a few medium sized canvases, a few good quality oil brushes and max 2 oil paints (student grade water soluble oil paints). I would suggest getting one warm and one cool red, blue and yellow as well as white and black. I cannot tell you how much painting and art has helped me 'move through stuff' over the last ten years. I started when I was a teen and have continued since.
Good luck, I'm sure you'll find something perfect.
No matter what, telling her what you've just told us.
Oh sheesh... that put me over the emotional deep end today!
God bless her for being so selfless, and God bless you for acknowledging her and the sacrifice she made!
Not sure what your price range is, but how about one of those necklaces with a figurine of a mother cradling a baby? (They come in sterling, so that would be a less expensive option...) I mean, she did carry this child, and she apparently didn't want to have to let her go. And she does still have a relationship with the child. So I don't see any reason that it would be inappropriate to give her a keepsake like this that shows that she did bear and love this child? Emotional? Yes. But it is real.
Something like this, there are many styles...
http://www.amazon.com/Sterling-Silver-Pierced-Mother-Neck...
Best wishes to both of you. God bless...
Maybe you could get one of those hand/foot print mold kits and she (your daughter) could take it with her to see her child and they could make a keepsake for your daughter to bring home with her. I think you can by these kits at Babies r Us. Or (maybe a bit expensive) but you could hire a photographer to attend the babies birthday with your daughter so that she has great memories that are captured and everyone can take advantage of this one.
How nice of you!!! A heart necklace/bracelet with the babies’ date of birth engraved.
I would get her a heart locket for a picture of her daughter.
Not sure if this is an appropriate gift, but maybe a small locket with a picture that I'm sure she will take that day of her and the child or maybe just the child? I dont really know if thats appropriate, or something that she would want, but I was just thinking maybe something she could carry with her always and change as the child grows. Maybe start a charm bracelet with a locket on it? Sorry I couldnt offer more suggestions, but thats where I would start. Good Luck, and its also great that she has someone to support her as this time must be difficult for her.
I like Meridith's suggestion. Something she can wear with the date engraved on it. Sort of like a promise ring but this can be a "rememberance" ring or bracelet, or necklace (whatever you choose).
I hope tomorrow goes well for her.
This is so sad...
And i have a very shallow answer for you, please dont get me wrong i know this must be very upseting for her....i just really think it could actually be a good idea...
a gym membership.....i dont know if shes got her pre prego body back, but it must be important for a teenager to look good again, and maybe she will start to feel like before, at least physically and she will begin to move on?
I really dont want to sound stupid so im sorry if you think i do =) i just truly belive this is a nice present, that will help her take her mind off everyday and it wil help herself...
Wow K., what a beautiful story!
I like Ephie's idea of a really nice journal (my teenaged daughter writes VOLUMES in her journals), and some pens!
Such a pleasure to read a post like this, thank you!
Have a great day!
:)
This is such a great story!! You sound so kind and the girl sounds like she is a great mom. Sometimes to be our best is to know our limitations. I wish more young mothers had that maturity. You know her best but I think taking her out to lunch or treating her to a manicure with you so that you can have fun and also give her the chance to talk to you about her feelings about the event would be great.
A on location photo shoot with all of them and some of just her and the baby so she can make a family photo album???
I agree with the locket!
Check out personalcreations.com. They have a ton of neat gift ideas!!!
I received from my daughter actually a necklace called a prayer box, but my daughter calls it a hugs and kisses box. She will re-fill the box with hugs and kisses, so they never run out. Just another cute idea. My older daughter got me a charm bracelet with a heart locket from Things Remembered. Sounds like you are a great mom to this girl, she is very lucky to have you in her life!!!
check out redenvelope.com it has great mom gifts...i love it!!
Wow - I cried reading your question.... I love the Willow Tree figurines...and I think there are a few that you could get her. http://willowtree.info/products/figurines/all
Angel of Mine, Guardian, Healing Grace, Hope, Keepsake, Love, Remember, -the Angel collection: Angel of Grace, Guardian Angel, Remembrance
All good ones, also love the silver band or the locket ideas.
