L.B.
I would go pick up a copy of Love and Logic. I'm a huge fan of it! Everytime my son was disrespectful or disobeyed I said the oh-oh song then I would sweep him up (lovingly) and put him in his room. After only a few months I can now just say oh-oh and he will either walk himself to his room or immediately say sorry and ask if he has to go to his room.
oh-oh song "Oh-Oh, so sad, looks like someone needs a little bedroom time for being disrespectful to mommy. you stay in there until your sweet again"
This really does work - I'm not a perfect mom but I've learned to put up those boundries that he needs and I have so much more fun with him. And our twos and threes have not been terrible at all.
you can go to www.loveandlogic.com to learn more or you can email me and we'll get together. It's the best thing I've ever done for myself and my child.