Forgetfulness Becoming a Problem

If I didn't make a list, I think I would forget to get up in the morning. ;} I'm 36 and a single working mom to an 8 year old son and he helps remind me of the things I forget. Kids! I do believe they sucks all the brain cells out too. I hear it only gets worse as the kiddos age. Good luck!

I totally understand how you feel... I have been increasingly forgetful for years and ever since I had a kid... forget it! (and I'm 31...)

Some days I want to laugh about it, some days I want to cry, some days I can't remember why I'm upset. :-)

I used to remember everything, little details included. Now, if it's not on my calendar or a to do list, it doesn't exist. I'm worried that in a few years I'll have to add things like "pick up the phone when it rings" to my list each day.

This started happening to me along with other signs of perimenopause, so my doc thinks it's hormone and age related. Yay me. So far I've been able to compensate by keeping more of a written schedule than I used to need. And also by letting my husband know what's going on so that, like your's, he won't think I just don't listen anymore.

Thanks for posting this so we all don't have to feel like the only ones in this boat!

I plan to check back to see what other's post as far as ideas to help manage this. That is, you guessed it, if I remember.
I plan to check back

Recently, I was diagnosed with A.A.A.D.D. -
Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder.

This is how it manifests:

I decide to water my garden. As I turn on the hose in the driveway, I look over at my car and decide it needs washing. As I start toward the garage, I notice mail on the porch table that I brought up from the mail box earlier. I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car. I lay my car keys on the table, put the junk mail in the garbage can under the table, and notice that the can is full. So, I decide to put the bills back on the table and take out the garbage first. But then I think, since I'm going to be near the mailbox when I take out the garbage anyway, I may as well pay the bills first. I take my check book off the table, and see that there is only one check left. My extra checks are in my desk in the study, so I go to my desk where I find the can of Pepsi I'd been drinking. I'm going to look for my checks, but first I need to push the Pepsi aside so that I don't accidentally knock it over. The Pepsi is getting warm, and I decide to put it in the refrigerator to keep it cold. As I head toward the kitchen with the Pepsi, a vase of flowers on the counter catches my eye--they need water. I put the Pepsi on the counter and discover my reading glasses that I've been searching for all morning. I decide I better put them back on my desk, but first I'm going to water the flowers. I set the glasses back down on the counter, fill a container with water and suddenly spot the TV remote. Someone left it on the kitchen table. I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV, I'll be looking for the remote, but I won't remember that it's on the kitchen table, so I decide to put it back in the den where it belongs, but first I'll water the flowers. I pour some water in the flowers, but quite a bit of it spills on the floor. So, I set the remote back on the table, get some towels and wipe up the spill. Then, I head down the hall trying to remember what I was planning to do.

At the end of the day:
the car isn 't washed
the bills aren't paid
there is a warm can of Pepsi sitting on the counter
the flowers don't have enough water,
there is still only 1 check in my check book,
I can't find the remote,
I can't find my glasses,
and I don't remember what I did with the car keys.
Then, when I try to figure out why nothing got done today,
I'm really baffled because I know I was busy all damn day,
and I'm really tired.
**********
My friend sent this to me. I think it hilarious...and SO true!!

.

I actually thought of posting something like this earlier this week. Last Monday, I thought I was seriously losing my mind. I forgot to send a bday card with my son when he went to a party the previous weekend. Found it Monday. I got the wrong horse feed. I forgot to send treats in to my daughter's school. I forgot to shut the door to the room the aquarium is in- my toddler dumped an entire canister of fish food in the tank. I got my son to practice late, because I forgot the start time (we are over a MONTH into the season- it's not like it was his first practice.Duh). I'm sure there' s more, because I was seriously concerned about my mental state.

I always tell people that giving birth destroys brain cells. I have 4 kids, so my IQ must be in the single digits!! . LOL! I'm considering starting some of those mind games, that help ward off dimentia. OR there's some herb (ginko?) that I might start taking. When I get to the point that I'm forgetting to cook dinner, or pick up my kids from school, I will drive myself to the nearest insane asylum. I'm close, but not quite there. .........ugh.

LOL Welcome to the age of the 40s! Seems like everyone I've ever known and still know seems to notice things different when they hit around age 40. Some are in denial, like my husband. He's 41 and denies that his bones are starting to feel more achey. I tell him he's getting older, that magic 40ish stage but he refuses and says it's his lifestyle. Well, duh! And it catches up to you at a certain point.

I'm 45. Yup, forgetfullness! I swear I've been losing my mind this last year and a half. But everyone says it's because we've had a rough last year. Yes we did. But I've had worse years in my life when I was younger and didn't have poor reactions with memory and more tired. Could it be that I'm now in my 40s and trying to deal with the BS of life? LOL Why yes, it is!

You'll find that you have to accept that you're getting older without getting out a walker and feeling bad for yourself. Just start using things to help you like more lists, labels and telling people including your husband that you ARE listening but are having more problems with memory. (This is why they came out with that came for adults to help keep your memory sharp!)

It's normal and ok! We're not 25 anymore!

K. B
mom to 5 including triplets

I have always believed, since I first had my daughter, that having children kills your brain cells. At first I thought that it was due to sleep deprivation from having an infant. Then I thought that it was tiredness from having a toddler and a new infant. Then I thought that it was because I was running after a preschooler and a toddler. Now that they are 8 and 6, I am known to my kids as "forgetful Mommy" because I never seem to remember anything. I actually have to ask them to remind me to do something, or I will completely forget.

And I'm only 29. I just hope I don't get any worse. ;-)

I even have a name for this ailment, I call it Momnesia...I think when we have multiple kids and we are multi-tasking we just can't keep track of all of the trivial and not so trivial details. I have had to treat this as a serious issue and not one I could laugh about because it was giving me serious panic attacks each time I would lose/misplace something and I was driving my family crazy. I have ONE spot that my cell phone goes in Each time I set it down, one place I ALWAYS hang my purse, one place I always hang my keys the Second I walk through the door, Not after I have put away groceries, not after I have sorted through mail or checked emails. IF I do not adhere to the strict regiments I have laid out for myself I turn into a person I do not much like, yelling and being upset and that was not teaching my kids 15, 10 and 3 to be responsible and I want to lead by example.
I put everything down on a calender in the kitchen and I put important papers in a safe spot not just stacked here or there. I feel like this helps a lot, just getting more organized and keeping up with a routine helps. Do I still lose things? Goodness yes, in fact today I had a full blown panic attack over a paper I needed to take some place VERY important ( My son's record of community service hours, which if I had lost it he would have had to re-do ALL the hours!) anyway I did not take the time to put it in a folder ( which I typically do) I had simply folded it and stuck it in my purse...what a nightmare!!! I found it but I had to search my purse several times and make one frantic phone call home in the meantime. I do not like feeling this way, I know that when I take the time to do it the right way life goes so much smoother, it is just hard to make yourself appreciate the times when things go smoothly...but we all remember how bad a panic attack feels like!
I adore FlyLady...google her she has a free site and has helped me get organized! Lots of luck = )

It happens to a degree, but it was way off the scale when I was on cholesterol medication. I actually drove down a street I lived on (still lived on) for YEARS and for 10 min I had no idea where I was.
When I quit taking the medication, my memory came back and I no longer have problems.
Besides my memory, it was killing my joints. This also cleared up when I stopped taking it.
Cholesterol be darned, but trying to keep it low with a statin was seriously impairing my quality of life. I'll never take them again.

Ummmm..what did you say again? Oh, yeah...you bet! And soon you're going to lose your near sightedness....fun stuff! I'm 48...my friend is a few years older and she went to the store went inside...came out..found her car and it was still running with the keys in...and she is fine. I take some vitamins (b12,d and calcium) try to do some yoga or walk for at least a half hour a day and laugh a lot...if all the laundry is put away and the kids (and husband) are in the right bed when I go to sleep then it is a good day. Oh, and I love those little yellow stickie things for really important things like pick up child#4 after school....Good Luck! M.

It is so hard keeping everything straight with a busy family! I used to forget/lose stuff on a daily basis and it was so frustrating, well finally I said enough is enough and made some major changes to how I do things. I used the Flylady system which I can't recommend highly enough (www.flylady.net). A few things that really helped me:

1. Decluttering. You can't find stuff when there are piles everywhere. Spend 15 minutes a day putting away/throwing away all the things that are lying around. Pretty soon you know exactly where everything is, no more searching!

2. Establish a "home" for important items. When I walk in the door, the first thing I do is put my keys in the key drawer, my phone in the charger, and the diaper bag next to the crib. Every time, no excuses. Now I always know where they are.

3. Use a wall calendar. Get one with large squares and hang it where the whole family can see it. Make a habit of writing EVERYTHING you need to remember on it, as soon as you get the information. Check the calendar every night and first thing in the morning.

I totally understand what you're going through. Go check out flylady.net, which is totally free. It is so much more peaceful around here now, in my home and inside my poor brain, now that I'm not just relying on memory anymore. Good luck!

When I was pregnant and shortly after I had my son I used to forget things all the time. Once I came home after grocery shopping and left the groceries in the cart. It was so embarassing having to go back to walmart because I left a few of the bags behind. It is better now. I would get an organizer or calender and put it where you can easily see it. Make notes of what you have to do,like appointments,birthday parties. I would also tell you to do some things which require concentration like a crossword puzzle or suduko. Play the memory game with your kids. You have so many things going on you feel overwhelmed. I am 42 so I understand about having to remember so many things. Good luck

I have felt more "stupid" this last year than ever before LOL! I don't know if it is because I have two kids, work full-time, am a wife, etc, etc or what but I don't feel you are alone. It amazes me the things I forget. I do make lists and when my husband tells me something if I don't write it down I forget. How sad is this . . . I dropped my son off at daycare one day and within 30 seconds forgot that my daughter was still in the car. I started to go to work until she said something and it was only then I realized she was still in teh car - ahh! I felt really dumb :) We Moms need more times to ourselves to unwind our brains and relax . . . ok, so it is a nice thought.

I'm a working mom, but I feel the same as you. I'm 37, and more and more I'm forgetting things. I know I'm extremely stressed out so that could be part of it. A few weeks ago, I was talking with my sister about my parents anniversary a few years ago, I don't even remember going, but she remembers it clear as can be. Then parts of it started to sound familar but more like I dreamt it, not lived through it.

I blame it on my husband, he's my big stress factor...age, and then I just say I'm losing it...You are not alone...

I'm in exactly your same boat. 40, 3 kids, and ALWAYS looking for lost stuff. Sometimes the kids "rearranged", sometimes I've lost my own keys 3 times in one day and can't remember to do stuff. I've lost my wallet putting it on top of the car 3-4 times this past year, and I dont' even remember putting it up there, so telling myself, "Don't put it up there" does no good! However, I was just talking to my good friend, age 27, mother of 1, who is having the exact same problem and losing her mind. Someone posted a question about "What stupid forgetful things do you do?" on here a while back, and it was hilarious. One mom actually left the baby in the car seat on top of the car and drove a little ways!!!!

Anyway, I think it's a hormonal mom thing. Your attention is always divided and you can't focus. I do find, if I go to bed early, get 8 hours of sleep, do a little yoga in the morning and eat well CONSISTENTLY for like a week, I start to get a lot better.

But then I slack off and chaos resumes.

LOL I could have written this I'm gonna be 34, have on DS who's 21 months and I work full time. DH pokes fun at me, but Lately I honestly just feel like an IDIOT! Its terrible! I NEVER used to be like this..... it's starting to get to me. I have to write lists and Notes for everything. BUT sadly I noticed that the notes just start to blend in with the rest of the scenery and get ignored! HAHA
SAD but you just gotta try to laugh ...........

I think this is typical behavior for most people just because of the type lifestyles we tend to live these days but I do think women tend to get it worse because we DO have so many things on our plates and expected to wear so many hats. However with that being said sometimes our memory loss can be due to certain medications or diets we follow so be sure to rule that out as well.
My mom was on a certain type of medication and she would tell me the same thing over and over again within the same 20 minute phone conversation. I would tell her "mom you already told me this" or I would be sarcastic and answer her and she would say "GASP....Well how did you know that? and I would say mom.....because you already told me this.....and she would just laugh it off and say "Yeah I'm going crazy or I'm losing my mind or I'm getting old" however once she stopped taking this particular med it did get better I wouldn't say totally but my mom has always been a bit of an airhead anyways-lol! .....But I still love that gosh darn woman to death! She leads a VERY busy lifestyle though. Works full-time for a very bust Internal Medicine practice, takes care of my grandma 3-4 times a week, while trying to take care of everything else in life-very busy so I know alot of hers has to do with all the distraction and responsability she has in her life. I ask her all the time when are you going to slow down? She says she doesn't know because she has severe back pain too -I honestly don't know how she does it but I guess when you have no choice you just do.......

Get tested just incase you have early on-set Alzheimers.

Blessings...