For Moms Who Stopped Breastfeeding After One Year

I took a 4 day weekend to visit my mother out of state and left dh with the kids. We were only doing a handful of feedings at that point (maybe 3/dy). When I got back, he didn't ask and I didn't offer.

I started the weaning process by pumping all my daughters feedings and then giving them in a bottle instead of actual breastfeeding. I think I started this at about 11 months and she would only breastfeed in the middle of the night which was pretty much everynight until a bit after we completely switched to whole milk. Maybe we are just one of the lucky ones but my daughter was completely weaned before 13 months and she was fine with it. For a few weeks we had to get into the habit of making her a bottle in the middle of the night but she quickly decided that sleep was nicer than to wake up and have to wait for a bottle. I did have a bit of a moment though when I realized that I wasnt going to be breastfeeding her anymore
Good Luck

I had to remove guilt, shame, and obligation from the equation.

I had to quiet "the committee" in my mind, and listen to my deepest heart. "What is right? Is it time? What do *I* get from nursing/not nursing. What does my daughter get from nursing/not nursing."

I started weaning at 14 months and my daughter took her last drink at 15 months. It was a sweet winter morning and we took a shower. When we were dried off I sat down and rocked her and let her drink. Light was coming in soft and grey through the window. She closed her eyes, and was gently sucking.

I thought, this has been wonderful. And now, my indecision is affecting you. You don't know if it's going to happen, or not going to happen. It's time for M. to be consistent. And now, this phase is over.

When she was finished, I kissed her, and laid that chapter to rest.

Something that had worked, wasn't working anymore. It was time for M. to reclaim my body. She was physically ready, and emotionally capable. So that was our last time.

Before that, I gently cut out one feed at a time. We started with pre nap/bed sessions, worked our way out of nighttime feeds, and then, finally, stopped with a morning and afternoon feeding.

It was gentle, and slow, and hard to let go of. But I knew, in my deep heart, that it was time.

So I approached it that way. I didn't feel I *took* it away from her. Rather, we moved into her development. And MY development.

When we're done, is a very personal decision. And, do what is in your deep heart. If you're done, you're done. If you're not done, embrace your choice and keep feeding that baby. Either way, do what's right for you and your baby.

Good luck!

I would seriously consider not changing anything (the feeding on demand aspect) until much later. Keeping him on breastmilk as his main source of 'milk' is beneficial to everyone due to his being in daycare. Daycares and children are walking germs... your son is less germy due to the daily intake of antibodies and lactoferrin he consumes from your breastmilk. If he didn't need and want the breast, milk and your closeness - he wouldn't ask for it. If he asked for his lovey, would you remove it from him and put it high up for him to see but not gain comfort from? Probably not... Your child doesn't need a lovey - an inanimate item to bring comfort and safety - because he has you, his Mother.

I don't understand why you think you HAVE to wean him sometime soon... many Mothers practice extended nursing or child led weaning. www.kellymom.com and the le leche league site has a lot of information about those 2 types of groups. I"m personally in the child led weaning group and my daughter couldn't be more intelligent, healthy, loving, friendly, independent and happy with her breastfeeding experience than if she was genetically designed.

My second self-weaned at 17 or 18 months because I was pregnant with my 3rd, who I weaned fully at 27 months. The last one was hard, but we were both ready. He was old enough that after the last time, the next time he asked I just said "you're a big boy now like your brothers and it's time to just drink from a cup - let's go get some juice" and that was pretty-much it, but he was much older than your little guy.

If it still works for you and him, there's no need to give it up now or any time this year. Keep going as long as you're both still comfortable with it, be it another few months or beyond age 2.

Dear Mom,
First of all, congrats on breastfeeding for this long. I breastfed both of my kids until they were 2 years old. I felt guilty with both about going for so long. Then when I had a doctors visit, the nurses congratulated M. on continuing for 2 years and said that was the best thing to do! So, I don't think you should feel like you need to stop in a couple of months. I really feel it is a very personal thing between the mother and child when to quit. I will also say though that, unfortunately, you will probably have to initiate the quitting when you're ready because the child will not voluntarily stop. You can do this by cutting out feedings gradually and offering something else when the baby wants your milk. The last feeding the baby usually gives up is the one before bedtime. I would try to quit the middle of the night one first because this can disrupt yours and the childs sleep. What I did was to gently shorten each night feeding by unlatching my baby and then eventually I would say "The milk is in the sky" or " There isn't any milk tonight" or even say "M. is tired" and offer to just snuggle instead.

I think you might be feeling emotional because you just aren't ready to stop breastfeeding yet. That's O.K. I was defintitely pressured by my spouse and mother in law to quit, but luckily I didn't let it change my mind. When I did quit, I didn't feel too emotional because after 2 years I was definitely ready to quit! So, hang in there and try to enjoy this special time in your life.

Sincerely,
A fellow breastfeeding mom :)

To drop feedings, I used distraction techniques. Like, OK, we can nurse right after we go for a walk/do this puzzle/have a snack. Usually he would forget about it, especially if I left a sippy cup of water or milk nearby while we were doing the other activity. Even if he still wanted to nurse at the end of the activity, it would at least delay the session, so we were able to spread out the sessions this way so he got used to a longer stretch without nursing.

For the feedings he really didn't want to let go, I cut them down by time -- so if you're typically nursing for 30 minutes, go to 20, then 10, then 5, then 2, then 1, then literally 30 seconds (I let him nurse at each length of time for a few days before halving again). He would squirm and try to fight his way back on in the beginning but eventually adapted and then one day it was just over.

I kept the bedtime feeding longest -- that was the last to go. Good luck!

I weaned my son. At 12 months I think he was nursing 6 times a day. I just picked one feeding to drop first (the breakfast one ws first to go, I think). I'd feed him food, then quickly give him a toy or play with him so he'd forget about nursing and be distracted with the toy. The last feeding to go dried up on it's own (the bedtime feeding). The boy nursed and got upset when he didn't get any milk. I started giving him milk in a sippy before bed, while I held him.

That's what worked for M.. It sounds like your kiddo wants that bonding time and loving pacifier that you give him. I say do what works for you and your kid. But weaning helped my boobs not become engorged. I took out one feeding each week. He was completely weaned by 15 months.

what worked for M. was getting it down to 2 feedings /day, one in the morning and one at night just before bed. My daughter is 3.5 and we still do the one just before bed, it's part of her routine that she LOVES, I do too. It certainly is emotional, for Mom and baby, especially when you don't really want the BF relationship to end. That's why I've decided to let her self wean, it takes the weight of the decision off of M., because I was never ready to stop! Although, I can tell both of us are now getting close to the end, we talk about it sometimes, I tell her she'll have more time to read books etc.. so I am preparing her (and myself!) One suggestion for you though, is when you get him home from daycare, just change up the routine, distract, and just tell him, "no nursing (or what ever he calls it) until bed-time", be consistent, give him something fun to do, like help you with laundry or something he can feel like a big boy, let him help make his sippy etc... Main thing, is not to give in, he'll get it after a few days. It may be a little tough for those few days, but you have to make it work for the BOTH of you, that means YOU too Momma ;)) Good luck!

I breastfed my first until l she was about 26 months. When she turned 2, I decided to seriously wean from "M. milk." At that age we could talk about what we were doing and why. I started by eliminating the middle of the night feedings unless she was sick. I told her before we went to bed that if she wanted “mommy milk” she needed to drink some before bed because she wasn’t getting any until morning. A couple of weeks later (adjustment time) I eliminated her afternoon/after school feedings by giving her a snack and distracting her with playtime. If she asked for milk I would just tell her she could have some before bed. The morning feedings were next (after a couple of weeks) replaced with breakfast time. The night feedings were the hardest, but by then my milk was drying up and she actually wean herself the rest of the way. We talked about how she was not a baby anymore and didn’t need “mommy milk.” I then distract her with something else =) Through each transition there were moments when she took it really well and those where she would cry so it wasn’t a smooth road but she started to understand toward the end that she really wasn’t a baby anymore and didn’t need it. I, of course, always offered extra snuggles to replace those snuggles that I was missing out on.

In the grand scheme of things, those close moments with your child is just a fraction of yours and her life – at least that’s how I saw it. Yes, I was tired. Yes, I wanted my body back. Would I change how I did it – not in the least.

I had to be very firm and never give in, which was really hard because I was engorged and it would relieve both baby and myself. Baby would cry, I would leak. Baby would cry, I would want to. Yes, it was difficult. But it helped to offer other liquids in the sippy to get them to like and look for the sippy. I had just had to be firm, say no, and offer the cup. Over and over. It didn't take but a few days, but those were pretty emotional days for everybody involved.

I do not think I have much help for you my son weaned himself at 13 months ... I would reccomend what some have done, put bandaids on your nipples and tell him that they are hurt/broken etc to stop him from nursing to see if that helps.

At fifteen months I started only nursing my son beforebhis nap in the afternoon and before bed. When he wanted to nurse in the late morning I started distracting him. We would read books or play. It was a lot of work, but it became a new routine quickly. We ended up going cold turkey at twenty one months due to a miscarriage. I didn't know how to stop until I had no choice. Distraction worked great though!

Break up the routine around the feeding you want to get rid of. For example, when you get home from daycare do something you would never normally do, like put him in the stroller and take a walk, or go outside and play. Try distracting him with something else. At his age it shouldn't take more than 1 or 2 days before he's forgotten he ever nursed at that time. For the morning feeding, start by giving him breakfast first, then nursing after for a couple of days. Then when you're ready to drop that feeding, instead of nursing him after, whisk him away somewhere. Do something different. Babies under 18 months are easy to fool; older than that and they're more likely to remember they're missing a feeding! If you ever go on vacation, those are the best times to drop feedings, since they're so overwhelmed by the change in routine and the new things they're seeing, they completely forget.

I am pretty much doing the same you are with my 15month old. My first one I nursed until almost 20 month. My second one I stopped at 12 month. This is my third and last one and I am very emotional about stopping. I know that she doesn't really need it anymore and it would be wonderful to sleep through the night. But, I am not ready to stop and that's just fine. In a couple month I may be ready. Just enjoy that special time for now.

Congratulations!!!! I have Breastfed for 19months, my daughter never tasted formula and never drank from a bottle. I loved it and i lvoed being close to my daughter. Honestly, at times it was exusting. I felt like a walking buffet. After the 12th month I only bf mornings and nights for the comfort for most part. Weaned the mornings and then nights. As for boobs, wear the bra pads. It took about two weeks for the discomfort, not the pain to go away.

Both my kids just stopped one day. My oldest was 14 months old. One day I put her on my lap to nurse her. She took one sip, looked at M. kinda annoyed, slapped my boob then hopped off and played with her toys. That was that. We never nursed again. My little one stopped herself when was she 11 months old. Nursing took time away from keeping up with her sister. She wanted to be a big girl and go sippy cup style like sissy : )

It your case it's rare (or maybe not ; ) that both mom and kiddo want to keep things going. Kudo's for you mama. I think you are torn and that happens. Hey if my kids didn't stop themselves I may have gone on until they were two. Just mentally prepare yourself and gradually try and stop if that's what you want to do. Doesn't look like your son is there yet however. Each child is different. Don't let anyone make you feel one way or another if you keep going. You'll know, and it will work itself out : )

No, I did the happy skippy dance when I turned in my breast pump. But, breast feeding was a HUGE struggle for M.. I never really did produce enough milk to keep my daughter satisfied and there were long periods where she would eat every hour, so hard on M.. Still I slogged through, and at about six months my period came back and knocked my already low milk production even lower. I fought and fought, but finally gave up at eight months. Not ONCE did I ever get engorged or have any sort of discomfort when I stopped, and I just stopped. I didn't slowly ease myself off of it or anything. My body just was done.

Now, if I had actually produced a lot and it wasn't a source of constant frustration, then I might have been sadder about it.