Feels like Discrimination--Boulder Moms and Others-Tell Me What the Deal Is

Updated on September 29, 2010
E.M. asks from Boulder, CO
18 answers

Ok, so I've posted tons of questions on here about my ADHD, very bright, challenging, creative, social almost 5 year old. She misses the kindergarten cut off by about 2 weeks which is fine. One more year of preschool will be good for her. In the next few months, open enrollment starts in Boulder. Our default preschool is probably my LAST choice for her (it is our public school district school though many open enrollment/charter schools are much closer to us). Anyway, I've started researching schools and have found some really incredible schools nearby that I'd love to open enroll her in. Open enrollment means we would get in or not based on a lottery systerm. I've talked to different women in the school system who have told me that if your child has an IEP or learning disability the school has the choice to deny you based on whether or not "they feel they can meet your child's needs." This sounds a little fishy to me and it feels a lot like discrimiation. My child doesn't get the same choices as others? The school district "prefers" that kids with IEPs go to the district public schools??? Am I right in feeling a little ticked off about this or is this par for the course from now on?
**I should add, I have NOTHING against her going to a district school. I do not want her to go to this particular district school. There are great school district schools in Boulder (property values are affected by which school district you are in) and we are in the WORST one. It is a crappy school, trust me. If I had the choice of just sending her to my choice of district schools, it would be great. I have to send her to this particular school based on our address.

What can I do next?

  • Add yourAnswer own comment
  • Ask your own question Add Question
  • Join the Mamapedia community Mamapedia
  • as inappropriate
  • this with your friends

So What Happened?

Thank you everyone! I am learning a ton! We are starting the process soon and it is a daunting task because I want what is best for my daughter and things are so different from when/where I grew in small town Vermont! Everyone went to one school and that was it. It was almost easier. The schools I am talking about are not private schools--they are one charter and two regular open enrollment and I confess I don't understand it all yet. All I know is that there is no tuition. That is one reason that I posted the question--choosing the best school would already be a huge responsibility but having an IEP for ADHD makes it even tougher. That is why it is nice to have a huge pool of knowledge to draw on from all of you. Thanks! And please keep the answers coming everyone--I need all the info I can get.
P.S. Oh, Denise, if moving to another school district were that easy I do it! But the real estate in Boulder is SO EXPENSIVE that it it isn't an option--especially for the schools we would want/need. :) If we had the $$, we'd be there already!

More Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

C.C.

answers from Springfield on

I totally understand that you want to make sure your child has the best school and every opportunity. You are a good advocate for your child.

I enrolled my child in a prestigious daycare where she excelled more than we could have dreamed. When we went to sign her up for the K program, we were told it was going to be hard on my child as she was not reading and half the kids were. The teacher told us within 4 weeks they would be doing 1st grade reading and my child would be one struggling.

I was offended and not about to let them keep my daughter from the best K program in town. She struggled all year, her confidence shrunk, and she had a bad experience(as did half the class who also could not read).
All the parents of the struggling kids all agree we should have put our kids in regular K where they would have been challenged and successful, not over their heads. Plus, the teacher did not like the kids who could not keep up.

I taught at a private school that truly allowed anyone to attend. This included kids expelled for assaulting teachers, children with serious behavior problems, and children who had IEPs from other schools.

Eventually all the kids with IEPs left. Why? Their needs were not and could not be met at this school. The teachers did not have the training or any desire to get trained. The one girl in my class actually regressed in her social and academic skills. I was very dedicated and gave up any breaks to work one on one with her. I talked with her parent, social worker, special education teacher from the previous year, and her therapist. I did every thing they said.

Still, it was not in her best interest to attend this school.
I told the mom before she enrolled that her current school was superior to ours at meeting her child's needs. Like me, she wanted "the best" school for her child. I believe the girl lasted 6 months before the specialists convinced her mom to return her.

Can you call the district from a payphone and inquire about the particulars?
I believe if you do try the charter school and it does not work out, you can easily transfer out. Transferring in seems to be near impossible.

3 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.S.

answers from Denver on

Don't look at it from the negative...my DS has delayed speech. The preschool he went to, very nice one, could not accommodate a speech therapist for him. He went to the public school and thrived. His speech is now where it's supposed to be. If he would have stayed at the other school, he'd be struggling and frustrated as his speech would have continued to be delayed.

Charter schools are set up to provide a specific type of education. They hire based on that criteria. If your DD can cope in their environment, then most likely she'll be in. If the teachers they've hired aren't set up to deal with her IEP, it won't be a good fit and everyone- her, the other kids, the teachers, you and the administration will suffer for it. She won't thrive, the other kids will be disturbed, the teacher will be beyond their scope, you'll be frustrated and the administration will be trying to appease everyone.

So, although on the surface the school may seem like a good fit, once you dig deeper, it may not be. So try and see the positive, that although the curriculum may not be exactly what you want, the teachers helping her succeed will be exactly what you're looking for. HTH.

3 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

T.S.

answers from Sacramento on

That's correct. School districts are required to provide a "free and appropriate public education" to every child, but it would be unreasonable for them to offer every service at every site. Staffing needs and physical resources alone would make that impractical.

The district won't stop you from open-enrolling her into one of the other schools, HOWEVER, if the services your daughter qualifies for aren't available there, you'd have to decline services (or transport her to your home school to get the services) to send her. If you want the services, you have to go to a building that has those services (like anything else in life... you can't show up at the ice cream shop and order pizza :-/ )

HTH
T.

3 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.B.

answers from Denver on

I'm an advocate for families with children with special needs, based in Denver, and your info is correct - in CO, having an IEP puts you in a different category for schools of choice. Since your child is so young, she would qualify in CO as a "preschooler with a disability" which has looser requirements. When she turns 6, she will have to be reassessed to see if she has an eligible disability that impacts her ability to access her educations. That can include ADHD according to federal law, but often a 504 plan, which provides accommodations for kids who need support but not active special education interventions such as occupational therapy or assistance with math or reading or writing. You can read a clear description of IEPs vs 504 plans, and the different diagnoses that are covered at www.wrightslaw.com , which is the best special education legal issues website. Feel free to contact me privately if you want to ask more questions.
take care, S.

2 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

C.S.

answers from Las Vegas on

McK4, it wouldn't be fair to your child to place her in a school that she would struggle to keep up. If her case of ADHD is very mild, perhaps you can work with her and teach her how to focus and overcome her disability. That is possible.

My cousin has adopted two children and the little girl came with a handful of problems. She was diagnosed ADHD (or possibly ADD) and she was medicated. My cousin worked with her and had her in therapy, as well tutors and after five years of having her, providing her stable living conditions, and a lot of hard work, she is now on the honor roll and med free. Anytime I went to the house during the week, their were tutors or speech therapists working with the children.

Does your district offer a Head Start program? Here, they work with the children at preschool ages and assist them in the areas they need extra help, through the school district. Why don't you contact your school district and ask if they offer any programs for her.

Best wishes for you.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.R.

answers from Columbus on

If you are talking about private schools, they can do what you are talking about. They take no federal funding, so they are not requried to follow IDEA guidelines, and can limit who they serve. However, unless the ADHD is very severe, you will probably be able to get into preschool.

What you are going to find is that if you find a school that takes kids with signaificant disablities, you are going to pay a huge premium, and in some of the schools who take kids with disablities, the typical kids may be getting a discount to be peers. The child who learns anyway they decide to teach and who is above average is covered by multiple choices, multiple places, and if your child does not, you are limited, and your choices are either public, extrememly limited, and/or very expensive. It is that way everywhere, not just Boulder.

You are right to be ticked off, but it is not discrimination, not in the law suit sense. It is a kind of discrimination, they choose who they want to serve. The public school can't do that, and if they did, it would be discrimination. For ADA, to be discrimninatory, the action has to deny the child admission to something that they would otherwise qualify for, based only on disablity. They could be said to be doing that, but they skate by on the "need' issue. They can't meet the childs needs, so they deny admission because the child cannot access learning the way that they provide it, and that is the standard that they decide admission upon. If, on the other hand, admision was soley based on IQ, say 145 or above, and your child had that, and they denied admission based on disablity, you might have a case, just like making a sports team based on skill, they could not deny admision once they found out the child had a disablity. But, they can limit admision based on criteria that the disabled child cannot meet, including the assumption that they have needs that they just don't want to put up with, and not violate anything.

Frustrating, but reality.

M.

Edit: Please stop questioning the early ADHD diagnosis. The I have read to diagnostic criteria, and there is an onset limit, meaning that it must manifest by a certain age, but there is nothing in the criteria that requires that the child be a certain age prior to diagnosis. The cause of ADHD is a disfunciton of the neurotransmitters or the nuerotransmitter receptors in the brain, which has no limit on age. That the child must have behavior that is out of the typical range is the limiting factor, but children can have atypical behavior that is clinically significant much earlier than most lay people realize. A qualified Developmental Pediatrician or child psychiatrist can make the ADHD diagnosis much earlier than most people realize, and this is extreemly beneficial to the child who can then begin the needed therapy to help them be more typical as they age. Early evaluation and therapy should be encouraged! This is a popular myth that just will not go away. MR

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.K.

answers from Denver on

Call the district school you want her to go to and find out when you can fill out a choice application. I am sure it might be different for each district, but in Denver the choice process starts in January. Ask them what your odds might be to get her in and make sure you apply for several options. I have seen many a parent cry because they did not have a plan B or C. Good Luck.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.S.

answers from Boise on

It all comes down to No Child Left Behind Act. Yeah the Act has a great name, but that's it. When they passed it, I just about fell over with the regulations that are placed on the schools which in turn are placed on the teacher. I taught at a school that they placed all the fault on the teacher and if one single child was not at grade level, the teacher was fired. I was not fired, I left, but I had 8 different education levels in my classroom alone, and the only way to get them all at grade level, which I did, was to level them. That did not make the school happy, because of the Inclusion Act.
Enough venting, therefore, the schools have the right to deny your child a place because they have to have the funding for the type of learning disability a child may have. A school will not turn down your child just because she has ADHD, so you should have nothing to worry about there. If she is smart and brite and just cannot sit still and pay attention, she should not be put on an IEP and she should not be pulled from classes or placed in special classes. IEP's are for students who have a learning disability, such as: Autism, Torrets, Not being able to comprehend grade level work, English as a Second Language Learners, etc.
I think public schools are good, but my children will not grace their doors.

1 mom found this helpful

S.P.

answers from Los Angeles on

I am grateful that there are so many programs in the school districts
to attempt to meet the needs of all the children.
When I was a child, there was pretty much just a one-size-fits-all
kind of system. We've come a long way.
I am curious.
Two of the moms who responded here closed with "HTH".
Would someone please tell me what this means.
Thank you.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.M.

answers from Dallas on

It sounds like she has not been denied enrollment yet. Try enrolling her and see if she is accepted first - if she isn't, then start looking around. As Thea said, not all schools have the ability to handle all types of issues. Although, since ADHD is so common these days, I would be surprised if she was denied.

I say enroll her in the school you want, see what happens, then go from there...try not to worry until there is something to worry to about :)

Like Jenny said - I would also question the diagnosis of ADHD - that is a very young age to already have that diagnosis.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.P.

answers from Denver on

It is not discrimination if they do not have the staff, training or other resourses needed to help your child learn they are not the right school for your daughter any way. If they are a private school they have the right to refuse service, more so if they do not feel like they have adiquate resourses to do a quality job. I thought Colorado had schools of choice meaning if you could provide transportation they could go to any school with in your district is there an other school in you districe she could attend? You may use the same argument against them find a school you want her to attend and point out the resourses they have that your daughter needs, they may let her attend a school outside her district if there is a special need that is not met with in you district.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.A.

answers from Denver on

Yup this is one of the many drawbacks of letting your child be labled. It will follow her always...

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.W.

answers from Boise on

I just wanted to let you know, not to worry too much. If she has an IEP for some delay or more assistance due to her ADHD, it shouldn't be aproblem for any shcool to meet her needs. Some kids have severe issues and require tons of help. Since the school has the option of choosing, which is just insane to me, they can deny those kids with complex IEPs. I wouldn't imagine your daughter to have a comlex IEP whatsoever.
Any public school has to meet the needs of the IEP, they get paid based on the IEP to provide the assistance needed.
So, chin up and try it. Worse they could say is no, but in your case I doubt that she would not be allowed in due to her IEP.
Good lucK!

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

R.J.

answers from Seattle on

It is, BUT you can use that to your advantage. :) :) :) Talk with the specific teachers/ spec ed/ gifted people in your schools who do the adhd stuff. Get a relationship going with them, and be the all excited/happy mum with the teachers in the programs (and principal if you get a chance to meet them)... and then when your daughter's name comes up at their school it doesn't get struck as an unknown, but "Oh yeah, Melissa will do great.".

Yes, it's politicking, and yes, it's a pain.

We homeschool our adhd kiddo (so much fun!), but our school district is similar (lottery), and this is what my friends of adhd and aspie kids have to do in order not to end up getting bussed into a lousy school 45 minutes away.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

D.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Why not move to a better district?

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.P.

answers from Salt Lake City on

Many children who are diagnosed with ADHD are misdiagnosed. Most of the time the children are allergic to milk products. There is a test you can do to determine if she really is ADHD. In the morning before eating anything, have her write her name. If she writes, it should be her best. Then, after breakfast, (if she has milk) wait about 30 minutes and have her write her name again. If she has a milk intolerant, she will not be able to write it as well as the first time. I know of several people also that said because of their "ADHD" they were able to learn quicker than their peers. They are hands on learners, right brained, and have to see and touch everything around them. Most teachers prefer to have children who are left brained because they can sit still and learn quietly. Hopefully you can find a teacher who understands both types of learning and makes things easier for your daughter.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

G.B.

answers from Boise on

Why not just give her the best school in the area and home school her!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.C.

answers from Denver on

It is quite unfortunate that charter schools are like that....they just aren't set up for teaching different levels of learning. I reside in the Adams 12 school district and from what I've heard around is that most of the charter schools don't hire certified teachers, which is why they only allow certain kids in. Think of this way, if you have a classroom of kids all on the same learning level....much easier to teach right? In the public schools, its more challenging for teachers because they have all sorts of different learning levels to teach, therefore they have certain standards to meet by the state and the district. I totally understand your not wanting your child in a certain school, if you're able to drive to another side of town and enroll there,then do it....as for Boulder, I'm not sure if what you're being told is correct, but it very well could be, and if that's the case, be prepared to deal with some really snotty people who think their kids are perfect! lol

For Updates and Special Promotions
Follow Us

Related Questions