Unfortunately, I recently had to remove myself from a toxic friendship like this. I've known this girl for 20 years and have never really understood her. I've often felt sorry for her because men leave her, friends talk about her behind her back, and she even lost custody of her daughter a few years ago. We were work acquaintances. However, when we began hanging around each other outside of work, I started to notice something. She was the most negative, harsh person I'd ever met. She can find negative in even the most joyful things and seems to thrive on being miserable. I read a cartoon one time that I've always associated with this friend. It was two angels talking to each other up in Heaven. There was a "Complaint Box" sitting on a table on a cloud. One angel was saying to the other angel "well...because some people just aren't truly happy unless they're complaining". I thought, "Man! That sounds just like ......".
I recently became engaged and sent out a little note telling all my friends. Everyone was so excited for me....except, you guessed it. She wrote back with the snottiest note about how my last marriage didn't work and how I swore I'd never fall in love again. She said she couldn't believe I'd even consider marrying a man with small children because mine are grown and I finally had it easy. And on and on and on. I read it to my fiance. He's never met her (and never will). He was like "Geez! You called her a friend? She's horrible!" And with that, I did not answer her at all. I deleted her email from my address book, and I blocked her email address from coming through. Maya Angelou says "When people show you who they are ....Believe them." I believe that my so-called friend is a hateful, jealous person and I do not have time in my busy life to baby her fragile ego and emotions. She is very immature and I'm done. She's 43, it's time to grow up. Good luck!