Dear S.,
I am going to weigh in with what I sense is an unpopular view point here, but it's one I feel strongly about and have some experience with. You are on the right track with trying to keep the big picture in mind - your son won't starve if he doesn't eat for a day or two, and ALL toddlers go through periods of eating more or less for days on end for any number of reasons. Your job as a parent is to offer your child a variety of healthy foods at regular intervals ( about once every two hours for busy toddlers) through out the day,and then relax and back off,and let him choose how much he will eat. As long as he is growing,and gaining weight there is no need to worry. If you can't help but worry,ask your doctor to recommend a good chewable multi- vitamin ,and keep a food diary noting what and how much your son eats each day for a week. You may be surprised to find how much he eats even on a fasting day! It is true toddlers often graze- meaning that they eat small amounts of food quite frequently,and this is not a problem , but I strongly recommend NOT allowing your child to eat on the run for several reasons: One, it's not safe and he could choke. Two, he is now developing the eating habits that will serve him for life, and you want to help him to develop good habits. Three, and this is most important- by insisting your son slow down, sit down, and focus, you are teaching him to tune in and listen to his body,and his hunger signals. This is SO important for young children to learn to help them avoid eating issues later in life ( either over or under-eating). On fasting days, try to offer foods you know your son really likes,and offer only a very small amount at a time,and let him ask for more ! Too much food at once can be overwhelming to toddlers. Also watch his liquid intake, and make sure he's not filling up on juice and other liquid nourishment in place of food. Hope these ideas help. I know it's not easy to let go of your worry, but if you can, it will help both you and your son to avoid a struggle around this issue. L. S