Easing Child Out of Parents' Bed

I have an 11 month old that I just moved out of our bed. The first night was kinda rough but the rest have been ok. The first night I put her in her crib, she was sooo sleepy she did not wake up immediately. However, she woke up 30 minutes later. She refused to lay down so I let her cry for 5 minutes then I went back to lay her down. She refused again so I let her cry for 10 minutes. She went to sleep within that 10 minutes. I hated hearing her cry but I was sooooo sleep deprived from her being in our bed since birth that I went through with the crying. Miraculously she slept all night. The following nights were different. But I think she learned that her crib was a place for her to sleep. The second and remaining nights, when I laid her down, she let me rub and pat her back while she looked at me through the rails (no tears!!!). I stayed with her until she fell asleep (couldn't bear letting her cry again). She fell asleep in about 5 minutes. She woke up the fourth night a few times but I didn't take her out of the crib. I just sat down next to her (on the floor) and rubbed her back. I believe that "crying it out" doesn't work for every parent or every baby and is not necessary for a successful transition. However, in my case, I think it taught my DD that the crib was a comfortable place for her to sleep. And when I am with her, rubbing her back and looking at her, she falls asleep pretty quickly. Also, you may want to start a routine before bed that somehow ends with him going in the crib. We have been doing the same routine since she was like 3 or 4 months so she knows bedtime is coming up. We actually finish the routine in her room now (with her in her crib) since she sleeps in the crib (rather than our bed). I hope this helps. Good luck!

I read that after about 4 months of age babies will remember where they fell asleep and if they wake up somewhere else it throws them off. Our ped. advised putting the baby in the crib to sleep while they are still awake but sleepy and not letting him fall asleep in your arms. I think the advice about putting him down for naps in the crib so he gets used to it is a good one! I am sure the first few nights will be hard but then he will probably realize how comfortable he is in the crib. good luck!

We went through this with my first son. Definately worked to work on naps during the day first, then later bed time. That way if he cries all through nap, at least you are not losing sleep.

If he all ready naps in crib during day, then you are going to have to bite the bullet, and start putting him down in his crib sleepy, but awake. He will likely fuss and scream etc. Different strategies for how to deal with this, but in general the experts all agree that it takes 3-5 days to break of the habit, but after that it does get easier.

I liked Goodnight Sleeptight, by the Sleep Lady. Also No Cry sleep solutions is a good one.

Good luck.

You could try a transitional stage between your bed and the crib. You could put a futon or matress on the floor next to your bed. I'd like to know if that works for you

Don't put him down while he's still asleep. He needs a very gradual but consistent transition to his crib and the "rude awakening" of being put down onto that new, cold mattress from your arms isn't a happy one for him! You want him to associate the crib with good things. I agree, start with his naps for a while, with him still in your bed at night. Then start the nighttime transition too, putting him down sleepy but not totally asleep. Sit down on the floor or in a chair next to the crib and lay a hand lightly on him as he falls asleep, and lift it gently once he's asleep. This routine may seem dull for a while but it does reaassure him that you're nearby. But don't take him back to your bed because you feel sorry for him. I do not believe in "cry it out" at all, but I'd stay with him and soothe him while he remains in the crib rather than taking him to your bed some nights and not others -- that would confuse him.

It's good to get him out of your bed now rather than later; I know some parents just love co-sleeping but I knew one couple who let their son run the show and he was still in their bed at nearly 5 years old. Need I say that the parents weren't very pleased with that arrangement?.....

As the previous poster wrote, make sure there is a blanket between you. Not only will he not notice the temp difference so much but you can use the blanket to lift and lower him. Let him fall asleep in your bed with a blanket beneath him and use that to pick him up instead of touching his body which seems to immediately wake them up!

Try starting him on naps in his crib. He'll get used to it enough to start his night there, instead of starting his night in your bed and being moved to the crib.

when you pick him up, make sure there is a blanket between you and him. then when you lay him down he won't feel the temp difference.